Have you been sitting in your home afraid to turn on the television, read the paper, or log onto the internet in fear of missing out on additional doses of sweaty nakedness and gory combat in your cable television diet?

Fear not, Spartacus is returning.

When the star of the show Andy Whitfield encountered his second, more aggressive form of cancer the show’s future was seriously in doubt. They made a prequel show, but the show that has become Starz’s flagship was in limbo. The folks in charge have seen enough to know the show must go on and a new Spartacus that “is not a household name, but potentially have a built-in fanbase” will replace the chiseled and charismatic Whitfield.I wonder if that means an actor known for another genre show or some crossover fellow from the music or reality television world.

All I know is that the person would have to look pretty damn fit and tough to fill the sandals of Whitfield. That guy looked like he interrupted his workouts with workouts and slept vertically in an elliptical.

So, tons of sex and impaling is in your somewhat near future, Starz subscribers. I think that’s a load off… your mind.

Plus, one of my oldest friends and favorite people in the universe is a writer on the show and he promises that the writers will “melt eyes this next season“.