Because nothing sells tickets like a poet and his friends getting stinking drunk for two hours, here comes The Best Time Of Our Lives, the biopic of celebrated Welsh optimist and drinker Dylan Thomas. If he can get his schnozz out of the tumbler for at least a scene, you might recognize Matthew Rhys from Titus (Shakespeare, not Fox) as Thomas. Opposite as the husband of his childhood friend is Cillian Murphy, with Kiera Knightley as said friend. Dylan Thomas and his wife weren’t exactly known for thier fidelity to one another, so expect some poet/pirate shagging.

And I’ve been putting off typing this, but Lindsay Lohan is currently cast as the poet’s wife, Caitlin, whom Thomas famously met by placing his soused head in her lap and proposing. I’m hoping that Lohan will fail out of rehab again and be replaced by a cinderblock. Those things have two big holes in them, so it’s probable that no one will notice the difference.

Directing is John Maybury, whose last known feature crammed Adrian Brody, still smelling vaguely of Oscar, into both a little box and a really goddamn ugly (The) Jacket. Consider my confidence inspired! Then again, watching The Jacket made me want to drink for at least two hours, so maybe this is a perfect pairing.