http://chud.com/nextraimages/johncarpentergothic.jpgFor many, the notion that John Carpenter is actually going to direct his first feature in seven years will come as a huge surprise; for me, the only shock is that he’s going to shoot it during the NBA Playoffs. Fucker must really like this script.

According to ShockTillYouDrop.com, John Carpenter’s return to ‘Scope* is called L.A. Gothic, and it’s from the pipin’ hot writing team of Jim Agnew and Sean Keller (the guys who just landed Dario Argento for the Giallo homage sneakily titled Giallo). The premise goes a little something like this: "Five interwoven stories of high-octane horror centering on a vengeful ex-priest’s efforts to protect his teenage daughter from the supernatural evils of L.A.’s dark side."

So it’s five stories about a girl applying for an entry-level position at CAA? Spooky.

I haven’t the slightest as to how you build an anthology film out of that, but Agnew and Keller just struck deals with Argento and Carpenter in the same week; clearly, they’re doing something right. Josh Keselman and Danny Sherman are producing the film for Principal Entertainment, and they’re currently eyeing a March start date (giving Carpenter a decent head start on the playoffs, but he’s bound to miss at least a month of the Lakers’ postseason – if they last that long). The report doesn’t mention where L.A. Gothic will shoot. Unleashing Carpenter on the seedy streets of Los Angeles would be a wonderful thing; however, depending on the budget, it would also be a prohibitively expensive thing, too.

Carpenter is still slated to direct "Skin and Bones" (by Drew McWeeny and Scott Swan) for the NBC series Fear Itself, but that’s contingent on the WGA Strike getting settled. L.A. Gothic will apparently happen first.

*Wishful speculation.