GiJoe2-1Sheet-online-jpg_185046The lead-up to G.I. Joe: Retaliation is a long story of hilarious miscalculations and bad decisions, most especially the one by which they wrote out their lead star who was about to break with three hits in a row. This led to reshoots as they ostensibly tried to sneak the guy back into the movie under the cover of a 3D conversion and a hefty delay.

Well once again we’re starting to edge close to the release of this thing, so it’s time for the trailer/character poster/TV spot/etc. cycle to reboot itself and start all over again. To start we have a brand new trailer with lots more action, some extra finished effects, and a healthy dollop of ole Magic Mike himself alongside new star, The Rock.

So yeah, pretty standard trailer save for a few key things…

• The dig on North Korea is cartoonishly dickish and so apropos of nothing that one hopes the entire movie is built on humor like it.

• This might contain the most fetishistic and detailed obliteration of a city ever. In most disaster porn effects shots you get individual buildings or a more episodic sense of desctruction that kind of obfuscates how many people must be dying at any moment, or presents the illusions that some evacuation was possible. Ole Joe says “fuck that” and presents a ground-up London apocalypse that probably contains at least a few million dying people in frame.

• Finally, is that the bad guys mega-weapon and ultimate plot device fucking blowing up in the trailer?! I mean, we all know how this plays out guys, but damn.

The film is set for March 29th, 2013.