Today was supposed to be Indy day.  It was the day we were all going to rediscover our inner eight-year-olds and, therefore, surrender our ability to ejaculate.  There would’ve been benefits to this.  But Warner Brothers had other plans.  They weren’t about to lay down for a sixty-five-year-old man smashing through windshields with his cast-iron hips, not when they had a completed trailer for summer 2008’s most estrogen-soaked movie.  So they did what any other studio would do.  They gave us the Pants.

Yes, Pants-fans, they’re all back:  Bridget (Blake Lively), Lena (Alexis Bledel), Tibby (Amber Tamblyn) and Carmen (America Ferrera)!  And they’re headed to Greece for all-nude adventures!  Love on the beach, lust in the dust, sex in the city, orgies at the American embassy, and a free-diving competition between two childhood friends that somehow involves Rosanna Arquette.  It’s art, it’s entertainment, and it’s gonna scorch the seat off your Wranglers! 

Because I have nothing of substance to say about The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2: Stick It Anywhere, I’ll conclude this meaningless news item with these thoughts:

Alexis Bledel:  Yes
Blake Lively:  Oh, you know it.
Amber Tamblyn:  Who’s going to know?
America Ferrera:  Turn it off!  Turn it off!  TURN IT OFF!!!