We’re
entering a new age here at CHUD, with a refreshed stable of writers, a
re-energized concentration of efforts, and a focus on consistent,
knowledge-backed fun. To ring in this new era for the site we wanted to
bring you a truly special, truly memorable, truly incredible list that
characterizes what CHUD is about, and we think we’ve cooked up just the
thing.

BODILY FUNCTION JUNCTION
The 25 Grossest, Most Execrable Moments in Film.

We’re
here to explore the most depraved, flinch-worthy, vomit-inducing (or
vomit-involving) moments ever put to film. We’re not interested in
simple gore and viscera here… We’re looking for the shittiest, pusiest,
cummiest, pukeiest, piss-filled scenes in the history of
motion-pictures. Some will be huge, some will be small, but they’ll all
be gross. We’ve also put an unprecedented amount of effort into
pre-planning, scheduling, and dividing the effort for this list, so
expect it to hit you every one of the next 25 weekdays (with a number of
special surprises planned for the weekends!).

So without further
ado, grab your nearest complimentary airsick bag (or maybe just a whole
trashcan) and jump into CHUD’s newest list.

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DAY 18
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THE MOVIE?

Thriller – en grym film (1974)
aka Thriller: A Cruel Picture
aka They Call Her One Eye

Thriller – A Cruel Picture was one of several films that Tarantino mined for his Kill Bill saga. The film was a Eurotrash take on the revenge movie craze that was sweeping America. Given its Swedish origins, director Bo A. Vibenius felt the need to include some heavy sexual situations. That’s right, people. You get to see some fucking. Those hardcore penetration shots were omitted from the American release which was re-dubbed They Call Her One Eye.

The shots are pedestrian and the entire script falls apart upon heavy inspection. But, that’s not why you watch flicks like this. You watch flicks this to see that one scene that all of your film junkie friends talk about forever. The eye-gouging sequence from Thriller is one of those moments.

THE GROSS?

Young Frigga was sexually assault as a child. The shock rendered her mute, which made it easier for a Swede pimp to trick her into the whore’s life. After getting her hooked on smack, the pimp renames her Madeleine and schedules several ass-pounding sessions. When the young girl rebels, Tony the Pimp stabs her in the eye.

WHO DOES IT COMES OUT OF?

The left eye of a smack addicted teenage whore. A medical cadaver was used for a stand-in scalpel target.

OUR VICTIM

Frigga starts the film as a young girl who gets molested before the first reel ends. While attempting to cure her mute state, Frigga heads out to the big city as a teenager. A local pimp kidnaps her, then gets her hooked on heroin. Frigga now dubbed Madeleine works her lady junk to get another hit of Sweet Lady H. When she has an aggressive client who pushes a little too hard, the pimp has teach her lesson. In Sweden, this means that you’ve got to take a scalpel to the eye.

We treat our whores better in America. If you step up to Frenchie, you might get a tooth knocked out. Hell…you’ll probably just get your weave knocked out by a strong backhand. There’s something a little fucked up about eye gouging. All I have to say is that the pimp had the decency to give her an eye patch. In Thailand, they’d probably let you fuck her in the eyehole.

OUR AGGRESSOR

The guy in the above screenshot is a pimp named Tony. I don’t pretend to know the economics of selling hot bitches, but Tony has an odd way of going about things. I’m not going to argue with the guy’s results, but he’s fucking hardcore. Who works up the ability to stab a woman in the eye? Sean Connery might slap a lady, but he won’t stab her in the eye. There’s something so uncouth that comes from holding someone down and giving them an ocular jab. Also, how weak do you have to be to not fight it off?

LIFE WITH ONE EYE


She spends the next 20-30 minutes of the film getting stuffed. She takes it in the meat locker, she takes it up the poopshoot and sometimes she just gets man-handled by a lesbian. Having only one eye must make you quite the fetching whore, as her clientele shoots up like a rocket post-gouging. After some time, she snaps and goes on a rip-roaring rampage of revenge. 

WHERE DOES IT GO?

In her fucking eye, stupid.

WHAT MAKES THIS ALL GO DOWN?

Neil Young said he saw the needle take another man. I saw the needle go into a young girl and make her pop that pussy. The killer of Cobain, Joplin and Hedberg is not something to be taken lightly. The one thing that left me scratching my head is how easily she went cold turkey. By the end of the film, she’s shooting guys like she was never hopped up on the shit.

While she’s actively taken the opiate of the rock star, she’s limp and unresponsive. Everyone flips her around and pounds her junk. The only time she doesn’t act like a ragdoll is when she’s finally got time to get a cock out of her hand.

(FUN FACT: Scenes from this movie were featured in the opening credits of Bitch Slap. Watching Bitch Slap is about as much fun as jabbing a scalpel in your eye.)

ANY CASUALTIES?

Frigga probably suffers from intense heroin addiction. There’s also the mental scarring from being molested as a child coupled with her kidnapping. By the end of the film, I’m willing to say that she can’t get naked without crying.

HOW GROSS IS IT:

The stand-in for the eye gouge was a corpse that the crew found via a local morgue. There’s something to be said for seeing the scene in motion, as the poorly lit sequence tends to rob you off the clear juices and crunch of popping the lens. The first time I saw it, I couldn’t wear contacts for a month. It’s weird, but there’s something unnatural about jabbing yourself in the eye with anything. Your mouth opens like you’re trying to scream. Your eyes water and you body seems to tell you stop. But, if we listened to our common sense…we wouldn’t have movies like this.

Today’s installment was written by Troy Anderson.


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