Movie Reviews

We’re a hotheaded group of individuals. We crave a pull quote like anyone else, but it’s not about that. It’s only about you the reader. We love you. We want to take you home and cuddle with you. The following reviews are the opinions of the editors of CHUD.com and are by most accounts bang on.

REVIEW: SYRIANA

Syriana is like the coolest social studies class you ever had. It’s fascinating, and it feels completely real and true, but in the end it’s also a touch academic. Stephen Gaghan won an Academy Award for his script to Traffic, so it’s no surprise that Syriana feels in many ways like Traffic 2: What Else … Continue reading

REVIEW: RENT

Chris Columbus’ film adaptation of Rent begins perfectly, with the cast lined up on a dark stage, singing the show’s signature number, Seasons of Love. The song has been moved from its spot on stage, and here it creates an ideal portal through which to enter the story. It’s also the most stylized moment of … Continue reading

SCRIPT REVIEW: N00bz

The video game industry rakes in billions and billions of dollars, but it seems like Hollywood hasn’t really exploited it properly. Sure, we’ve seen a bunch of video game adaptations, but not only are they uniformly bad, they’re sort of missing the point. There’s this huge subculture of gamers whose pockets seemed to be stuffed … Continue reading

REVIEW: WALK THE LINE

You should know that if, after seeing Walk the Line, you want to buy Johnny Cash albums you’ll have to go to the country section of your local record store. I say that because as I left the screening of the biopic I realized most of the movie had tried to keep Cash as far … Continue reading

REVIEW: BREAKFAST ON PLUTO

Cillian Murphy looks good in a dress. He has the body to pull it off – all sinew and bone, with a waist that makes you wonder how he manages to eat a Reese’s Peanut Butter cup without causing ridges in his belly. He’s what they call passable, and I think that’s the word I … Continue reading

REVIEW: DERAILED

If you want an object lesson in miscasting, look no further than Derailed. The two leads are playing roles they aren’t suited for, and what’s worse is that the only chemistry between them is what happens when an acid and a base meet. The soggy thriller is set in Chicago, except that no one seems … Continue reading

REVIEW: ZATHURA

I hate The Goonies. I tend to hate the genre that the film exemplifies: the screaming kids genre. That sort of film is typically just a series of set pieces that young actors scream their way through. It gives me a headache. But I love Zathura, and that’s certainly part of the screaming kids genre. … Continue reading

REVIEW: BEE SEASON

Here’s a spelling word for you: fatuous. Bee Season is a terrible and smug film, a movie that made me actually angry. If that was the effect it was going for I would call it a masterpiece, but since I am pretty sure that inchoate rage is the exact opposite of what the filmmakers are … Continue reading

REVIEW: GET RICH OR DIE TRYIN’

Jim Sheridan’s new film, Get Rich or Die Tryin’ has one huge, obvious flaw, and it’s fatal. His star, 50 Cent, aka Curtis Jackson, is painfully bad at acting. This is especially tragic as 50 is playing a character who is based completely on him, and whose life is based on his own. 50’s performance … Continue reading