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The motion picture studios send us vermillions of DVD releases for the purpose of review. More titles than you can shake a stick at, unless you have a lot of time and a particularly sturdy stick. Unlike most sites [and weirdly a source of nitpicking from some detractors who we’ve discovered are dumb and lonely asexual prick assholes], we review everything we’re sent. Even the gay vampire program Lair (from the makers of Dante’s Cove). We have a wide array of reviewers, all with functioning nervous systems and all ready to entertain YOU with their puns and prose. You. Are. Welcome.

DVD REVIEW: HOWL’S MOVING CASTLE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: DisneyMSRP: $29.99RATED: PGRUNNING TIME: 119 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• "Behind the Microphone" featurette• Interview with Pixar Animation Studios Director, Pete Docter• "Hayao Miyazaki Visits Pixar Animation Studios" featurette• TV spots and trailers• Feature-length storyboard sequence The Pitch "East meets West in a colossal battle for cinema magic and coherency! Everybody loses!" … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: THEY SHOOT MOVIES, DON’T THEY?

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner Bros.MSRP: $19.98RATED: UnratedRUNNING TIME: 87 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Director’s Commentary Track• "Top Secret" Commentary Track The Pitch "It’s American Movie, but not as good and, well, it’s fake." The Humans Jerry Feifer, Adele Baughn, Tom Paul Wilson The Nutshell Tom Paulson was a baseball star with plans to go … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: DOMINO

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: New LineMSRP: $27.97RATED: RRUNNING TIME: 127 min.SPECIAL FEATURES:• Commentaries• Featurettes• Deleted Scenes A recurring theme in Domino is the titular bounty hunter’s reliance on a coin flip in determining fate. Which is strangely fitting, since Domino ends up being approximately half a decent movie. Heads, you get petite stunner … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: WHO’S THAT GIRL

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner Bros.MSRP: $14.98RATED: PGRUNNING TIME: 94 min.SPECIAL FEATURES: Theatrical Trailer The Pitch “Bringing Up Baby meets 1987… and kicks its ass.“ The Humans Madonna (Bloodhounds of Broadway), Griffin Dunne (After Hours), Haviland Morris (Sixteen Candles), Sir John Mills (Hobson’s Choice) Courtney Love? The Nutshell Louden Trott (Dunne) is one … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: FRISCO KID, THE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner Bros.MSRP: $14.98RATED: PGRUNNING TIME: 119 min.SPECIAL FEATURES: Theatrical Trailer Avram, a young Polish rabbi (Gene Wilder), arrives in 1850s Philadelphia intending to travel to San Francisco*, where a synagogue and an arranged marriage await him. He is almost immediately double-crossed and robbed, and left farblondzhet in the American … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: MY BIG FAT INDEPENDENT MOVIE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE! STUDIO: Anchor BayMSRP: $17.99RATED: RRUNNING TIME: 80 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Audio commentary from Director Philip Zlotorynski and Writer/Producer Chris Gore• The Making of My Big Fat Independent Movie• Theatrical trailer• Set of 7 Collectable Postcards spoofing better Independent movies The Pitch “Does anyone want to fund my spoof on determinately … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: CIMARRON

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE! STUDIO: RKO PicturesMSRP: $14.99RATED: NR RUNNING TIME: 123 Minutes SPECIAL FEATURES:• Vintage Short – “The Devil’s Cabaret”• Classic Cartoon – “Red-Headed Baby”Westerns have had a tough sell, being the wholly American genre that produced greats and downright loathsome ones. As is the case of famed playwright Edna Ferber’s (Giant, … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: MAGIC

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Dark Sky FilmsPRICE: $19.98RATED: RRUNNING TIME: 107 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Fats & Friends Featurette• Cinematographer Victor J. Kemper Interview• Anthony Hopkins Interview• Anthony Hopkins Radio Interview• Ann-Margret Make-up Test• Theatrical Trailer, TV Spots, Radio Spots• Photo Gallery The really good directors – the ones who are artists as well as … Continue reading

THE SPECIAL EDITION – 3.14.06

The bridge to get you from here to there is usually filled with bombs, horrendous puns, and thoroughly awful wordplay. However, this week I’m going very short-and-scrappy on y’all. Let’s get down to it. Oi! Russell Crowe David Cronenberg’s massive cinematic tsunami of A History of Violence was one of my favorite films of last … Continue reading