I was talking to the wife today about one of my pet peeves. I hate hypocrites and I hate people who don’t know they are hypocrites even worse because that just makes them stupid.

What started this conversation was my memories of working at a pizza joint back in the early 90s. I will preface this by reminding people that I am a Christian. Now, I have not been to a church service since around 1989, so Sundays were a day that I was usually scheduled to work. Sundays around noon-thirty, the church crowd would start to drift in the doors. The suits and dresses and little kids dressed up to look like mini-me adults. I know all about this time of the day. When I went to church, we would leave church and head straight to one of the buffet places to eat lunch. My pastor used to make jokes that he would let us out 5 minutes early to beat the Baptists to the buffet line.

Well, the church people would drift into the pizza joint I worked at and then treat us like lower class humans. “You aren’t supposed to work on the Sabbath” they would tell me. “You know you are breaking one of the commandments” other narrow minded Christians would tell me. As an employee who worked to pay rent, I had to keep my job so I kept my comments to myself. Now that I no longer work on Sundays, and as a bartender don’t have to worry about holier-than-thou Christians to pay my bills, I have no problem responding to these people face-to-face.

Some scripture for Chud on this fine St. Patrick’s Day:

Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days shalt thou labor, and do all thy work; But the seventh day is the Sabbath or the Lord thy God; in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates; For in six days the Lord made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day; wherefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day, and hallowed it.

Let me break that down for you. As a Christian, you are not supposed to work on the Sabbath day. That is the only part these hypocrites seemed to get right. See that part in the scripture about not making your manservant or maidservant or any stranger work as well? By eating at a restaurant on the Sabbath day, they are sinning just as much as every person that is cooking their pizza, serving their pizza and cleaning up the god awful mess their kids leave all over the floor after they leave. Every one of these people looking down on you because you are not living up to their standards needs to step back and look long and hard at themselves. What’s that other scripture in the Bible where Jesus tells the crowd that those without sin should cast the first stones?

Assholes.

Speaking of assholes, I also have a problem with people who come to the bar I work at, order a dozen beers throughout the night and never leave me a single tip. I actually had someone sitting at the bar the other night watch this and they made a rude comment toward a person who never tipped. The person just looked at them and said I made enough money. I made the off-handed comment that bartenders at our casino made $2.15 an hour, the state’s server minimum wage. He said that wasn’t his problem and that I should get a better job. I held my tongue, but my new favorite customer did not. “He should find a better job,” she said. “Then you won’t drink here anymore because if all the bartenders you stiff find better jobs, there won’t be bartenders left.” The guy ignored her and walked off. If I remember right, that guy might have gotten cut off. It is legally the bartender’s decision when they have drank too much.

I love people who say that server wage employees (between $2 and $3 an hour plus tips) should find better jobs if they can’t live without their tips. Those are the same people that go and eat at a nice fancy restaurant. Yeah, let all the server wage employees go and find better jobs. Then there won’t be any waiters left to serve your ass. Go to McDonalds or a buffet and serve yourself, because you’re too stupid to deserve good service anywhere else. If you are someone who is known to never, ever tip don’t expect quick refills on your drinks or quality service. And pizza delivery drivers remember addresses. Your pizza might hit a few bumps on the way to your house, when it eventually shows up.

And before anyone goes off and starts ripping on Christians in general, remember this. A person who makes fun of a believer for being a believer is the exact same as a person who goes door-to-door and tells you if you don’t join their religion you will go to hell. It’s both sides of the same coin. I won’t push my beliefs on anyone but if someone ridicules me because I am a Christian, they deserve every Jehovah’s Witness in their town to pester them for the next week. It’s called hypocrisy and if you are willing to dish it out you better be willing to have it shoved back in your face.