I interviewed Haley Joel Osment for Second Hand Lions back in 2003 and it was obvious that this kid was about done. He wasn’t cute anymore. He wasn’t hitting the later teen years in an appealing way. His only hope, I figured, was to lay low through the difficult phase and try to come back out when he had grown up.
That time seems to have come, and Osment is asserting his newfound adulthood by playing… a virgin. In a raunchy, awful sounding sex comedy. Here’s the pitch, according to Hollywood Reporter: Osment plays “a college graduate who dreams of teaching high school Algebra but due to budget restraints, ends up teaching sexual education, despite being a virgin. He discovers an unlikely mentor in a blues bar, a ruthless enemy in the local PTA, and a gorgeous Polish girl for whom English is a distant second language.”
So we have a nerdy virgin, a magical negro, an evil soccer mom and a tit-flashing girl with almost no lines and lots of jokes about her being stupid. And they said the spirit of Porkys died.
The film is called Sex Ed, and it’s written and directed by guys you probably never heard of (I hadn’t). I’m doubting this is going to get a major theatrical release.