I figured in addition to the large List of Dumb columns that run a couple of times a month it’d be good to give folks a
daily dose, since there’s absolutely no shortage of dumb shit out there in the world. Help keep this thing going by sending your DUMBS to me
through THIS LINK. Also, please spread the word through your Tweets and Facebook and MySpace updates.

Though CHUD.com’s not for everyone, stuff like this is!
 
03/29 – Too young to see, just old enough to commission an ad.


Photo by Clay Young.

Anti-Abortion ads do not employ the subtle approach. You never see a “Please consider forgetting you have free will” plastered on the side of a bus. You also never see Pro-Abortion ads.

Recently driving through Florida I was astounded how many anti-abortion billboards there are. I mean, at least twenty between the Georgia border and Orlando. You know why, right? They need to ensure the next wave of Walt Disney World patrons. Or better yet, what if this is viral marketing for some new theme park…

All these ads give you facts about the little fellas brewin’.

“My heart is beating at blahblahblah days…”
“I have fingernails at blahblahblah weeks…”
“I can direct Jason Mewes at blahblahblah months…”

All trying to play on the gross-out factor. None of them just use simple logic:

“Kids can be great, even if you weren’t planning on one.”
“Give it a shot or maybe provide one to a family without one”
“Wanna use the HOV lane?”

But however you slice it, you should really not put words in the mouths of an 18 day-old embryo. Or your dick. Don’t put that in their mouths either.


* Trademark, Andrea Rothe.