A
Nice Hard Slap is dead. My blog is taking a new shape, though I don’t
assume it’ll get any smarter or more worth a link in your interoffice
email forward list because of the change.What
I promise is simple, frank, and oftentimes annoying opinion. I’ll
probably contradict myself and seem like a dick, burn bridges
[preferably Beau], and further ostracize myself from the middle but
what the hell. Life’s too short.

The Paper Wiight.

Fuck Nintendo.

That’s
not a bold statement by me as anyone who reads my shit knows I’m a huge
critic of the way Nintendo does business. I feel that they take
advantage of a somewhat blindly loyal fan base, releasing an inordinate
amount of shit products without repercussions. They make terrific
hardware and a few of their first-party titles are phenomenal, but they
never seem able to get to the point where they’re a true alternative to
Sony and Microsoft’s products but rather a curious diversion.

The
DS is a huge success on many levels and there are a diverse and classic
games on the system. Additionally, the “gimmick” of the two-screen
touch-based interface has been erased. It is a legitimate system, and
Nintendo’s grasp of the handheld market is not in dispute.

The
Wii, however… is a joke. It’s a toy for adults, a fun gimmick that
simply does not have the follow-through on its ambition. For all the
cool stuff, there are dozens of horrible products and after the initial
joy of things like Wii Sports and the like wears off it’s just
something to break out when the in-laws are around or when I want to
occupy a few kids without risking anything valuable getting broken.

Is that the legacy of the Wii? Is it just for kids, old-timers, and Nintendo automatons? It is just Retard-VR?

Yes. Yes it is.

Today’s Moments:

  • We
    played Monopoly: Mega Edition last night at the shop after closing and
    it’s going to take some getting used to but is rather interesting. 12
    more properties, a new utility. You can build skyscrapers and train
    depots. All in all a nice complement to regular Monopoly, which I play
    in one form or another at least once a day.

  • It looks like you’re stuck with Devin and I here at CHUD for a good, long while.
  • Steve
    Murphy has an incredible ability to ingest beer. Not as good as Will
    Mason or Mike Emunson, but close. Of the oddball choices we picked up
    yesterday, the best beer is by far the Stone Smoked Porter.

  • My shoulder will never heal without surgery.
  • I have only two films to watch before finalizing my Top 15 list.