One more time around might do it. One more time around might make it. MS had the impressive tech, lacked for games. Sony had games, but lacked at tech (and totally failed on the Vita front). Who the Christ knows what Nintendo’s doing at this point. Let’s find out together.

10:10–I…stand corrected. They closed on another walk through of Nintendoland. I can’t even finish my sandwich now. It tastes too much like failure.

10:09–Anybody else see the irony of Nintendo using all this new media to allow people to explore the company’s offerings deeper, and yet they still don’t know how to make online integrated in any sort of intuitive way?

10:08–WiiU launching this holiday? So, this year? Goddammit, I keep forgetting we don’t even have a release date or a price for this fucker.

10:06–It’s okay, they’ll pull out Zelda or Metroid or Starfox as a closer, and everyone will unconsciously leave their wallets on their seats, everyone’ll be fine.

10:05–This guy is basically reading the entire instruction manual for this game. This basically means you’ve failed at being casual if your game needs this much preface.

10:03–Right now, what I’m seeing is Nintendo making every single mistake they made on the Wii all over again. But with a bigger controller. You didn’t pee yourself, Reggie. It’s called potential. And it’s leaking.

10:02–Stop trying to make “Asymmetric Game Play” happen, Gretchen!

10:01Nintendoland. An open world amusement park with 12 different Nintendo universes as attraction. But, really, it’s a franchise centric WiiPlay.

9:57–They seriously stuck an ad for, in the middle of their presentation. I’m  dying inside.

9:56–More Ubi stuff available everywhere else coming to WiiU. Eh.


9:54ZombiU. Using the WiiU for Inventory, sniper rifle, X-Ray scanner. That’s LITERALLY all they showed. Congrats, Capcom. RE6 looks better now.

9:53–“Being the Puppetmaster is kinda like running Nintendo of America” CREEPY REGGIE IS CREEPY.

9:51–Another Just Dance. I’m gonna go get a sandwich. Call me if Usher shows up again.

9:46Lego City. Dude. It’s LEGO GTA. Looks like a ton of fun.

9:45–3rd party 3DS stuff. That new Castlevania is 2.5D. Cool. New Epic Mickey. Scribblenauts. Kingdom Hearts. Aaand….that’s it?

9:43–New Luigi’s Mansion, like they promised last year. FINALLY.

9:42Paper Mario: Sticker Star. 3D’s gonna look great, at least.

9:41New Super Mario Bros 2. August 19th. Did they seriously make a game where Mario LITERALLY prints money?!

9:39–There’s going to be a full hour of 3DS stuff tomorrow. What’s the point of this show, precisely?

9:38–“A couple minutes? Where’s the love?” MY GOD. IT’S FULL OF AWKWARD.

9:36Sing. They do realize the music genre’s been on the decline the last two years, right? That reminds me: Is Rock Band Blitz making an appearance here?


9:33–Music and fitness. Ah, Jesus.

9:32–They do realize everyone HATED Ninja Gaiden 3, right?

9:30–And now, montages of games WE CAN ALREADY PLAY ON SYSTEMS WE ALREADY OWN.

9:29Scribblenauts Unlimited for WiiU. SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY.

9:26-That seems the very OPPOSITE of immersive, if all you’ve got is the ability to  select explosives, and a new powerup ability.

9:24–Sefton Hill from Rocksteady. Quick, somebody call him a bitch for no reason!

9:23–I love Harley Quinn with the heat of a thousand suns, but this gimmick on top of the shitty DLC last week, good lord this has NOT been a good year for her.

9:22–It’s Mario. Of course it looks fun as hell. Love the Van Goghish backgrounds a lot.

9:21-Super Mario Bros. U. Mario, but with social networking. Sigh.


9:19–Miiverse. So, basically, it’s a yet-even-more-confusing and cluttered Playstation Home. Gotcha.

9:18–Confused applause. Not a good sign, guys.

9:17–They’re seriously explaining how a controller works. Jesus.

9:16–Are we really cheering about two-player?

9:14–“To understand WiiU, you’re going to have to devote more time.” If going to Twitter, Facebook, and the main site is REQUIRED to understand this thing, the general public, especially parents, are going to go Scanners.

9:11–The Fro Arrives.


9:09–“At a time when people are moving toward lighter games…” BECAUSE OF YOU GUYS, LEST YOU FORGET.

9:08–I’d play the shit out of a Pikmin game drawn in the same style as that concept art. It’ll happen on a cold day in hell, but still.

9:05–Yup. New Pikmin. Still the only game of its type I actually really enjoyed. I’m down.

9:04–WiiU controller. OK, looks way smaller in person. Like an oversized PSP.

9:03–That guy in the blue shirt in the middle is NOT AMUSED.

9:02–No matter what I might say about Nintendo today or in the future, that man’s a treasure.

9:00am PST–I gotta admit: this is EXACTLY what I think Miyamoto’s house is like. Just Pikmin EVERYWHERE.