STEADY LEAK: A MAN’S 007 RANKING LIST

Number 1

Goldfinger – Entertainment Weekly
From Russia with Love – Nick Nunziata
From Russia with Love – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Nothing to complain about here. More often than not, it’s these two films that are mentioned when the best of the 007 films are mentioned. You really can’t go wrong.

You Only Live Twice – Entertainment Weekly
The Living Daylights – Nick Nunziata
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Some divergent thinking here. I think The Living Daylights is the most eloquent and somewhat true to the books of the films (Casino Royale obviously takes that path as well). I think Dalton was a very suave yet brutal Bond and though this film sometimes drags, most of the Bond films have about fifteen minutes of fat. I don’t agree with Steve, as Lazenby makes me fall asleep in ways that only Natalie Merchant’s music can compete. As for You Only Live Twice getting this high a spot, i have to call EW’s bluff.

Live and Let Die – Entertainment Weekly
Goldfinger – Nick Nunziata
Casino Royale – Steve Murphy

Commentary: I’ve now seen Casino Royale twice, which is the true test for a Bond film. Most of them become really ridden with holes the second viewing after the big set pieces and punchines are gone. Steve’s inclusion makes sense. Live and Let Die? Are they nuts? Great song, but not a great flick.

Thunderball – Entertainment Weekly
Casino Royale – Nick Nunziata
Goldfinger – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Thunderball is another cure for insomnia. It’s not a horrendous choice at #4 but it ain’t great.

Commentary: Whatever.

Dr. No – Entertainment Weekly
You Only Live Twice – Nick Nunziata
The Living Daylights – Steve Murphy

Commentary: No complaints.

GoldenEye – Entertainment Weekly
Dr. No – Nick Nunziata
You Only Live Twice– Steve Murphy

Commentary: No complaints.

From Russia With Love – Entertainment Weekly
The Spy Who Loved Me – Nick Nunziata
GoldenEye – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Continued lack of complaints.

The Spy Who Loved Me – Entertainment Weekly
Thunderball – Nick Nunziata
License to Kill – Steve Murphy

Commentary: I like Steve coming to the defense of the criminally abused License to Kill, which isn’t a formula Bond flick but it has tons of merit [not the least of which is exploding Anthony Zerbe, an action figure I crave].

For Your Eyes Only– Entertainment Weekly
For Your Eyes Only – Nick Nunziata
The Spy Who Loved Me – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Wow, I agree with the rag for once!

Diamond Are Forever– Entertainment Weekly
Tomorrow Never Dies – Nick Nunziata
Thunderball – Steve Murphy

Commentary: A lot of people hate on Tomorrow Never Dies, but I think it’s a pretty solid flick and it has Michelle Yeoh doing some much needed heavy lifting in the action department. Jonathan Pryce is a piss poor villain, but he gets help from some really sharp filmmaking and good little moments. Vincent Schiavelli, we miss you. Diamonds are Forever has aged like a cock left in the cold.

Die Another Day – Entertainment Weekly
Live and Let Die – Nick Nunziata
For Your Eyes Only – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Fuck you, EW. That movie is the worst thing since Uncle Jake gave me the business end of his manpower.

Moonraker – Entertainment Weekly
License to Kill – Nick Nunziata
Tomorrow Never Dies – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Speaking of Uncle Jake… Moonraker.

Tomorrow Never Dies – Entertainment Weekly
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service – Nick Nunziata
Diamonds Are Forever – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Fair enough, and though some purists will hate on me for placing Boringby this low, they can go to the convention he’s signing autographs for $15 at and blow him. Just leave me out of the equation.

A View to a Kill – Entertainment Weekly
The World is Not Enough – Nick Nunziata
Live and Let Die – Steve Murphy

Commentary: It’s hard to muster much hate or love for anything in the 15 hole.

The Living Daylights – Entertainment Weekly
Moonraker – Nick Nunziata
Octopussy – Steve Murphy

Commentary: EW’s Dalton hate is palpable. I hate it.

The Man With The Golden Gun – Entertainment Weekly
Diamonds are Forever – Nick Nunziata
The Man With the Golden Gun – Steve Murphy

Commentary: I think Steve would rather shake hands with a terrorist than agree with EW, yet here it is…

Octopussy – Entertainment Weekly
Octopussy – Nick Nunziata
The World is Not Enough – Steve Murphy

License to Kill – Entertainment Weekly
The Man With the Golden Gun – Nick Nunziata
A View to a Kill – Steve Murphy

Commentary: Dalton hate surfaces again.

The World is Not Enough – Entertainment Weekly
A View to a Kill – Nick Nunziata
Moonraker – Steve Murphy

Commentary: No winners here.