Fifteen years in Hollywood, and I’ve been on a set or three. But never a Star Wars set of course; and definitely never a porn set. So what’s one supposed to do when he has the opportunity to visit the Star Wars XXX: A Porn Parody set? One shuts up, doesn’t ask questions and one goes of course. For this visit, I headed into the underworld of Downtown LA, to an industrial section of town, not knowing just what the hell I was in for.
The project is at the heart of the latest trend in adult entertainment: the higher-quality parody that was highlighted recently by Batman XXX: A Porn Parody. The director of that film is the director of this one: Axel Braun. Braun is a guy whose credentials read like anything but a porn director. Born and raised in Italy, speaks five languages, honest-to-God MENSA member, graduate of film school and holder of a friggin’ Ph.D in Psychology. So here’s a guy who could essentially headshrink exactly why you love porn, tie it in to your disturbing fascination with The Andalusian Dog, and make you feel really stupid about the whole thing… in a different language every day for almost a week.
Director Axel Braun
Star Wars XXX stars porn legends Lexington Steele as Darth Vader and Tom Byron as Obi-Wan Kenobi, with Seth Gamble as Luke Skywalker, Rocco Reed as Han Solo, Alex Knight as Chewbacca and Allie Haze as Princess Leia. Haze and Steele weren’t on set the day I visited, but I did get some face time with Braun, Byron, Gamble and Reed, which I’ll be doling out over the next few days. In those interviews, there’s the inevitable “who shot first” joke and lightsaber double entendre. All the gentlemen were very accommodating, as was my contact, a guy named Shylar. If you were to see him, Shylar is almost a dead ringer for a young Donald Sutherland, a fact which I noted to him. Forget a Star Wars set, I felt like I was there for the shooting of Kelly’s Heroes…
The first question you may have is: Was I on set during…well…you know. And the answer is no. And I’m not sure how I would have reacted had I been. Sure, I’ve perused the occasional blue movie. But for the most part, in the privacy of my own home. Not live and not with a bunch of strangers (not counting freshman year in the dorm of course). Plus, it might have been a bit difficult conducting interviews with a stiff one. So it probably all worked out for the best. As Braun explained to me, they do the sex scenes early in the day so that the rest of the day’s shooting can concentrate on the non-carnal stuff they need to get. But the scene that I was there for was the Cantina Scene. And as soon as I walked into the studio, it looked like I was on a certain Frank Darabont set, due to the air being thick with studio smoke. And as the pictures below will attest, there was the expected wide variety of alien and human characters afoot. I’ve got to say, for a production that knows exactly what it is and for what it’s going, the set and the atmosphere looked pretty damn good. If the rest of the movie is done with as much detail, Braun should definitely have another successful title on his hands.
Tom Byron, Seth Gamble, Rocco Reed
So I’ve compiled some of the pics I was able to get over at Guy.com, which wasn’t easy on set due to the lighting, the haze and my substandard camera. But there are some good ones in there, particularly a candid behind-the-scenes shot with a certain Wookiee. And FYI, there are a couple that are NSFW. If I make it back onto the set for Empire XXX, I’m going to make damn sure I’ve got a better picture-taking device handy. So thanks to Axel Braun, Shylar, Tom Byron, Seth Gamble, Rocco Reed, the cast and crew of Star Wars XXX: A Porn Parody and Jackie, our contact at Vivid. It was some experience.