See?  My excerpt didn’t lie. There she is. She wants you to read this.

And girls / gay men, I didn’t forget you.   I know I didn’t have to lure you in (we all kind of want to read about Gerard Butler on some level), so look for your skin pic at the bottom.

Despite all the promise of Mavericks, I knew Gerard Butler had another awkward rom-com up his sleeve. I knew it was called Playing the Field. I just kind of hoped hey, if I don’t report it, he’ll keep surfing. He’ll have to.  You have to have a lot of training to play a convincing surf mentor.

I was wrong. Variety reports that Playing the Field has what it needs to go ahead: Ladies.  Uma Thurman and Jessica Biel, respectively.

Playing the Field has Butler playing a former pro soccer player who agrees to coach his son’s youth team in an effort to reconnect with his kid and ex-wife. But oh no! All the soccer moms saw 300 and want that well-chiseled butt in their beds, so his plans get all crazy and complicated. What is a studly Scotsman to do, anyway?

Biel will play his ex-wife, and Thurman will play a fellow parent. I think that translates to “lusty single mom”,  actually. Gabriele Muccino is directing.   There will be a thousand stories speculating Butler, Biel, or Thurman have hooked up, possibly in one giant three-way, and it will be ten times more eye-rolling than all that giggly gossip of The Bounty Hunter.

I’m honestly not sure if this is Butler glibly poking fun at his  Don Juan persona, or completely buying into it.   The fact that he’s also the film’s producer does nothing to clear up that mystery.   Oh, Butler. I miss the old you that played broken men in things like The Jury and Dear Frankie, and not the 21st century Warren Beatty.

Still, I guess you can’t blame him.  He looks good.

Look at that! I catered to everyone with this post!  Can Playing the Field do the same?