365 days of Sci-Fi (Archive)

From the mind behind the mega-hit Syfy show you’ve probably never heard of (EUREKA) comes a tribute to all those no-budget Syfy original movies and the “so bad, they’re good” films that inspired them. Move over Roger Corman, step back Ed Wood, make way on your weekend programming schedule Mr. Stern, because here comes Andrew Cosby’s 365 DAYS OF SCI-FI.

And it’s all happening here! Each day, your friends at CHUD will bring you a brand new bad movie pitch — the best of the worst title Cosby can come up with, no matter where he’s at or what he’s doing, rain or shine, drunk or sober. That’s a whole year of the quality concepts you’ve come to expect from the network that brought you MANSQUITO and SHARKTOPUS.

Day 1Day 2Day3Day 4Day 5Day 6Day 7Day 8Day 9Day 10

And now… DAY ELEVEN:

I’ve always been surprised that Syfy (or some other network) never tried to take better advantage of the whole Harry Potter craze with their own low-budget version the wayward youth turned wizard formula.If they had, I like to think it might have gone a little something like this...

– Andy Cosby

It’s not the size of the wand, it’s how you use it.

Pitch:

In days of old, heroes performed valiant feats: slaying dragons,saving damsels, and defeating the forces of darkness at every turn. Their exploits were legendary, as were those few brave souls daring enough to undertake such perilous quests.  Since then, times have changed, and so have the heroes…  Meet Zack, a twenty-something slacker who doesn’t really believe in anything, least of all something as silly as magic.  But when the grandfather he never knew passes away, Zack finds he’s inherited more than just a run-down Victorian,he’s inherited his destiny.  And so a new quest begins, not with the sounding of trumpets, but with the arrival of a solitary key, crafted by long dead gods to unlock the secrets of Zack’s new home — and a world beyond his wildest imagination.  You see, his dearly departed granddad wasn’t just an eccentric millionaire.  He was Magis Imperious, a master sorcerer charged with protecting the Earth from all manner of otherworldly intruders.  Now that duty falls to Zack, his sole surviving heir and the last in a long line of powerful magicians dating all the way back to Merlin himself.  Which unfortunately means the delicate balance of power in the universe suddenly rests in the hands of someone who can’t even balance his own checkbook.  Taking up residence in a mansion with a mind of its own, Zack reluctantly begins his arcane studies under the watchful eye of his mentor and protector, Zamir, who works tirelessly to hone Zack’s mind and body, teaching him to wield each as a deadly weapon.  Joining Zack in this never-ending battle are some unlikely allies, including a feline familiar turned femme fatale, an eccentric museum curator, a cagey Hindu mystic, and a feisty college co-ed.  In a time when evil comes draped in Armani and real wizards work on Wall Street, Zack embarks on a modern-day hero’s journey, fighting to bring light to the darkness and hope to the hopeless.  This is his calling.  This is his destiny.  This is the world of SPELLBOUND.

Nick Says: This is as good (or bad) as the monsters are. The goal would be to avoid ‘Charmed with a penis’ and to invest in it a lot of Harryhausen-style mayhem to avoid the cheap and tired genre stuff permeating all corners. Great monsters, a playful old school vibe, I’ll bite.

Disclaimer:

This article series is in no way affiliated with SyFy. This is a creative experiment and ongoing test of nerves that is perpetrated by a few insane people and should be construed as such. If for some reason these people actually make one of these as a feature it must be chalked up to their own lunacy. These are the intellectual property of Mr. Andrew Cosby and not the property of CHUD.com or SyFy.