Slaves and Masters & The Condemned Woman (Twin Peaks, S2 eps. 15 & 16)

Windom Earle: “Now, Dale. Listen carefully: It’s your move.”

Forward movement – that’s something that’s been missing in the wake of Leland Palmer’s death. Despite the presence of some fine acting, some intriguing plot points, and some decent cinematography Season 2, post-Leland, has been largely an exercise in the spinning of wheels. This week’s episodes start correcting that problem, and while there’s still plenty of groan-worthy stuff here there’s also a sense that events are beginning to roll ahead again on the narrative and character levels.

That’s good, because Twin Peaks has slowly been losing my interest for a few weeks now. When Lost & Found began I proposed that you, my much-appreciated and quite-attractive reading audience, should vote on whether to keep me watching and writing about the show every two weeks. That option was eliminated due to popular demand, but the stretch of Season 2 we’ve been slogging through had me kinda-sorta wishing that option was still around. Not to say that the show’s turned sour for me or anything, but it’s been dragging more than I’d like and it’s grown harder to engage with a blank page each week to write these episodes up. Unlike earlier in Season 2, where Harold (aka Martin Short 2.0) and his storyline were godawful-yet-leavened-with-Laura-Palmer-related-spooky-shenanigans, there’s not enough counterbalancing storyline anymore to make up for the meandering mess of Random Ass (a division of Random House, all rights reserved, etc etc) plotlines that now make up the majority of this show. I’ve been kind to Twin Peaks in the wake of Leland Palmer’s death, but that kindness isn’t fully earned. This is a show that’s struggling to find its overall voice after solving its biggest mystery and that’s clearer to me than ever, given how languorous and “WACKY” it’s become.

But there’s some light at the end of the non-existent tunnel now: the show feels as if it’s starting to move beyond some of its most achingly-dull citizens and storylines. Lingering pain remains in both of this week’s episodes, but it’s a receding pain. I’m excited to write again, and I’m glad you’re still reading.

Thoughts on Slaves and Masters:

• The words “Directed by Diane Keaton” may be the strangest thing that appears in this episode. When her credit flashed up on the screen I half-assumed that it must be some other Diane Keaton, and not Kay Adams from the Godfather films. I half-assumed wrongly. Diane Keaton directed this episode of Twin Peaks. And she does a decent job of it.

I say decent, because while she seems to instinctively get the visual aesthetic of the show – seems to understand the sort of elegant/sinister directorial choices that help the show overall – she’s markedly less deft when it comes to shepherding some of the actors and in recognizing the difference between good quirk and bad quirk. There’s a broadness to some scenes that isn’t out of place, per se, but still ends up feeling “off” much of the time. Mirroring this is a kind of flatness in other scenes, and again there’s the sense of a show that’s being steered in the right general direction with a flat tire and a succession of drivers of varying skill levels behind the wheel.

• I’d thought us free at last from the slow-death-cranial-asphyxiation that is the Evelyn Marsh/James Hurley storyline, but it turns out that, like some terrible, shambling B-Movie monster, it’s not so easy to kill. Slaves and Masters spends waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much time wrapping up this low-rent subplot, and the episode as a whole suffers as a result. Whether we’re witnessing Evelyn wrestling with regret, or watching as Donna tries to help James, the whole thing’s capital-A Awful.

Good quirk: Three policemen tramp their way out of the Marsh house in a weirdly-crunched, single-file line. Six apparent-Postmen sit at a bar smoking identical cigars and looking off to the right without apparent reason.

Bobby and Shelly continue being not-particularly-interesting, yet not-overwhelmingly-dull. It’s a hell of a balancing act. While I’m growing bored of these characters (sorry, Madchen Amick – you’re still a knock-out, though) I am happy to see them pushing the narrative forward. Bobby finally gets around to mentioning that he saw Hank shoot Leo, which gives Truman a means to potentially put Hank away for a long time. This, in turn, means that Norma and Big Ed might finally find real happiness with each other.

Albert: “My invite back to Twin Peaks. Direct orders from Gordon Cole. As he so succinctly put it: ‘I’M WORRIED ABOUT COOP.’”

Albert Rosenfeld returns to Twin Peaks after a brief time away, and I’m happy as always to see his sour mug pop up again. The experience he shared with Cooper and Truman in witnessing Leland’s possession seems to have changed his whole attitude toward Truman, whom he basically bearhugs on sight. It’s odd to see affection between them after all of Albert’s acidic bon mots but it’s also oddly fitting. Unfortunately, Albert’s not back just to hug it out with Truman. He’s been sent to assist Cooper with Windom Earle, and he brings disturbing news: Earle’s been mailing packages designed to look like letter bombs, but containing pieces of Caroline’s wedding outfit. The distribution of these packages seems to form a horseshoe shape on the map that we’re shown, but the locations don’t mean anything to me at the moment. Do any of you have thoughts on why Earle would send packages to those specific locations? Just because he’s freakin’ crazy?

Windom Earle: “‘Domestic violence.’ I’m partial to that.”

• Kenneth Welsh, who plays the role of Windom Earle, is the very definition of “working actor.” With 190 acting credits listed on IMDB, Welsh has popped up in everything from The Aviator to Rise of the Silver Surfer to Smallville to The Exorcism of Emily Rose to The Day After Tomorrow to Miracle to Witchblade to Eerie Indiana to The X-Files (essaying the memorable role of Simon Gates) to Legends of the Fall to Timecop and on and on and on. I have a lot of respect for folks like Welsh. Theirs is not a career marked by the ability to take their pick of scripts or to command six-figure salaries; they don’t have much, if any, name/face recognition among the larger populace; they pop up over and again in roles like “Drunk Santa” or “Cop #2” or “Dr. Johnson” in between more substantive roles; they are, with sincere respect intended, blue collar artists.

I can see how some folks would be put off by Welsh’s portrayal of Windom Earle, based on the performance he gives in this week’s episodes. There is, in fact, a “Batman villain-esque” quality to some of his line readings. In moments, he resembles Frank Gorshin’s Riddler, and that’s a choice that can easily be disliked. But I don’t dislike it (so far). I kinda like it (so far). There are elements here that don’t work for me but aside from his penchant for fake Eye-talian mustaches and occasionally prancing ‘round in his skivvies whilst tooting away on a flute like some grimy, murderous Piper At The Gates Of Dawn he’s proving himself to be quite watchable (….so far).

• I’m not sure where Twin Peaks is going with this whole “Leo as Frankenstein in an electric shock collar” thing (guaranteed to be the only time in my life where I string that set of words together) but I can’t say that I’m bored by it. Maybe it’s just a partially-buried desire to see Eric Da Re (uggghhh) ride the lightning?

Nadine: Got all the way to the District Finals at Knife River only to find out the airplane slam is illegal. I was disqualified. Second Place. What a drag.

• Great jumpin’ hornytoads! Is it possible? Is it actually possible that the Norma/Hank/Nadine/Big Ed storyline is finally going to…go somewhere? Ed and Norma sleep together and resolve not to sacrifice their shared love for their responsibilities any longer. Nadine walks in on them in bed together and essentially gives them her blessing, telling Ed about her crush on Mike. There’s no way that Ed and Norma can actually end up together, right? I mean, the sheer fact of their talking at length about how its time to face the future and finally be together typically means that one of them is going to (a) die in a fire, (b) be killed off by malevolent spirits, (c) be caught in some compromising position that creates a second false separation between them, (d) fall victim to a roving band of cannibalistic clowns, right? This is Hollywood after all – the land where functional marriage is typically viewed as anti-drama.

• This isn’t the only storyline to get a swift kick to the keister, either. Josie’s Bore-a-thon shows signs of incipient life as well. Truman is forced to investigate her involvement in Andrew Packard’s death and the shooting of Cooper (remember that? Back in Season 1?), and the resultant emotional fall out is actually interesting/emotionally involving to some degree. Color me tickled pink or, more accurately, color me a slightly lighter shade of total indifference.

Bad Quirk: Cooper “struggling” under the improbable weight of Catherine’s dry cleaning.

• Hey, guess what? Ben’s still mad as a hatter. But, like most other plotlines in this episode, his character moves forward and seems to push past the inexplicable Civil War fetishism he’s developed over the past few episodes. The phrase “inexplicable Civil War fetishism” isn’t one you come across too often. I doubt I’ll ever string those particular words together in that particular way ever again. Savor this moment, folks.

• I don’t like you, Evelyn Marsh. Not because you’re a gold digging murderer, but because you’re a terrible, terrible dramatic character. In the script for this episode that’s available online, Donna has a line that I can’t remember hearing in the episode itself: “You make everything sound so pointless and stupid.”

If that’s not a pithy/perfect summation of this entire plotline then I don’t know what is. STOP MAKING THIS SHOW SPOTTILY UNBEARABLE, EVELYN MARSH. Lines like “I wanted you here for me. For the good and honest way you taste” make me want to pierce my eardrums with toothpicks. Luckily for all of us, the Evelyn/James “plot” finally seems to come to a close here. I’d tell you more about the resolution if any of it had anything to do with anything on this show, but none of it does. It’s a painful, pointless exercise in wasting valuable minutes of our lives and it deserves to slink away without further attention.

Pete: “I owe it all to the immortal Master: Jose Raoul Capablanca. If there’s chessboards in heaven, you’ll find Jose sittin’ across from the Lord.”

• Making Pete Martell a Chess wizard is clever, and having him serve as Cooper’s surrogate in the game between Coop and Windom Earle seems to promise more involvement from the character in general. That’s fine by me, since Pete makes for good company on this show. Here’s hoping that Pete’s signature brand of cockeyed weirdness gets further integrated into the police proceedings on the show.

• Amazingly, Shelly’s storyline pushes forward somewhat as well. We watch as she approaches Norma about getting her job at the Double R back, and I’m pleased to see her in that location again. Shelly’s always worked best as a semi-backgrounded character, and it’s my hope that we’re now through watching her stand around in her half-completed house, a stranded character in search of something – anything – interesting to do.

Eckhardt: “I must confess I received your invitation with some surprise.”

• It’s always nice to see David Warner pop up – even if it’s to act as a supporting player in Josie’s plotline. I find it amusing how both Eckhardt and Catherine refer to Josie as if she’s not even there during their scene together, something that seems fitting given how little there is to her character, other than her apparent propensity for off-camera murder and for falling, fawn-like, into Truman’s arms. Apropos of nothing in particular, I just want to mention how odd it is that Andrew Packard is an old man. I don’t have a memory of how many years have passed since his death, but he’s clearly old enough to be Josie’s dad, and that adds an extra layer of creepy icing to a humdrum cake.

Windom Earle: “Pretty words for pretty girls. Which one will be my Queen?”

• There’s a method to Earle’s madness – a calculating intelligence that’s hidden by his sometimes Riddler-esque demeanor. That, I think, is what keeps me interested in the character. There’s an element of goofiness to Welsh’s performance in the role, sure, but it doesn’t obfuscate the cold mania that’s present in the man’s eyes, or the simple, effective steps he’s taking to plot his “game.” Having Leo pen his “love poems” to Shelly, Donna and Audrey in order to cover his tracks is smart. Using an electric collar to subjugate a dain-bramaged brute to his will is waaaaaaay over the top, but it’s also smart. Earle now has a henchman, and we’re shown both Earle’s sadism and a strange sort of tenderness firsthand in his dealings with FrankenLeo.

• The episode ends with Cooper discovering Caroline’s “death mask” lying on his pillow. Earle (in a pretty terrible disguise) has broken into his room and left the mask there for Cooper to find, along with a taunting recording. Earle may not be much when it comes to wearing a convincing moustache, but he’s aces when it comes to creeping Cooper out. That’s good enough for me (for now).

WATCH JOSIE LITERALLY BECOME WOODEN…AFTER THE PAGE BREAK!