section by: Justin Clark and SCOTT!
ALPHA PROTOCOL
Sega/Obsidian
360, PS3, PC
6/1
MSRP: $59.99
CLICK TO ORDER FROM AMAZON!
Right idea, wrong studio. Oh, what Bioware would’ve done for this concept. Unfortunately, we’ll never know, as the poor, insufferable bastards behind KOTOR II developed this one, which means we can probably expect wonderfully well-written dialogue and plot, decent production values, and a list of klutzy design decisions that could line I-95 from Portland to Orlando, and still have enough to use as toilet paper every time you stop at Waffle House.
OTHER GAMES OF INTEREST
Backbreaker (505 Games; 360, PS3, PC; 6/1)
OOOOHH: ON THE DLC TIP
CALL OF DUTY: MODERN WARFARE 2 – RESURGENCE PACK
Xbox Live
5/3
1200 MS pts
Awesome, more overpriced maps that will bring XBox Live crashing to the ground while every 13 year old in the country tries to download it all at once. Sorry, that’s probably unfair. I’m probably bitter because I tend to loathe when the balance of any game series I love starts to shift in favor of the multiplayer, and don’t understand why the Valve model (create an awesome multiplayer experience that doesn’t completely abandon storytelling and character) hasn’t become standard, but mostly, I’m pretty sure I just fucking hate teenagers.
ROCK BAND TUESDAY
Spoon Pack 01 ($6.99/560 MS pts)
• Trouble Comes Running
• Don’t You Evah
• Turn My Camera On
• Got Nuffin
P.O.D. – Alive
$1.99/160 MS pts per track
Not much to be said about the Spoon pack. It’s just four songs from a pretty amazing band that will probably be a blast for guitarists and vocalists. That said, guys, I’d initialize Project Testicle Retraction to prepare for Turn My Camera On today if I were you.
If you’re excited for that P.O.D. song, just do me a favor: Don’t breed.