VIDEO GAMES
section by: Justin Clark and SCOTT!
SUPER STREET FIGHTER IV
CLICK HERE TO BUY IT!
Capcom
360, PS3
4/27
MSRP: $39.99
Street Fighter IV didn’t reinvent the wheel, but it was a wonderfully polished, deep, rewarding fighter that managed to let anyone of any skill level or familiarity with the series to enjoy, which is the factor that has prevented stuff like BlazBlue and Guilty Gear from achieving true greatness. Well, that and the hair metal. And the character design straight out of Yoshitaka Amano’s septic tank. Nevertheless, if there was room for improvement in that game, Super SF IV has got it all covered, from the 10 new characters, the completely revamped online multiplayer, the new Super move system, and a veritable wheelbarrow of bonuses features. The game isn’t even full price, which is exactly the way to do this kind of release.
Capcom loves you. What will make you believe me?
NIER
CLICK HERE TO BUY IT!
Square Enix
360, PS3
4/27
MSRP: $59.99
The often-awesome Yahtzee of Zero Punctuation fame once said of Ninja Gaiden II, which was developed specifically to appeal to Western audiences much like Nier, “I’m not sure if this says more about them, or us.” Nier doesn’t go as far off the blood n’ guts deep end as NGII, but it does seem to suffer from the same Japanese tendency of guessing what an American audience will go head over heels for instead of not giving a shit and doing their own thing with typically Western tropes*. In Nier‘s case, it apparently makes an attempt to be all things to all gamers of all genres, and failing at most. Which, I guess, could be some sort of commentary on how the Japanese see American games.
*–This means, get started on a next gen Parasite Eve, like NOW, assholes.
DEAD TO RIGHTS: RETRIBUTION
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Namco Bandai
360, PS3
MSRP: $59.99
You know that old chestnut about the cop who gets killed 2 days from retirement? Imagine that cop gets shot, let’s say the face and neck, but lives. He can’t run, can’t speak, breathes and eats from a tube, and right now, for some bizarre reason, that guy needs to shoot his way up a 53-story skyscraper to save a kidnapped Malia Obama from a pack of mutant ninjas who all have acid for blood.
That guy is what releasing another Dead To Rights is in the current game climate. It is failure.
Other Games Of Interest
2010 FIFA World Cup South Africa (360, PS3, Wii, PSP; 4/27)
Splinter Cell Conviction (PC; 4/27)
OOOH: ON THE DLC TIP
DANTE’S INFERNO: TRIALS OF ST. LUCIA
XBL, PSN
4/29
$9.99/800 MS pts
Dante’s Inferno, even used, still hasn’t hit that magical $30 price point that would make it attractive and worthwhile in a world post-God of War III, but when it does, this DLC pack will definitely sweeten the deal. You get a new character, which isn’t terribly exciting, except for the fact that it also adds online co-op, a new trial mode which includes 40 EA created challenge stages, as well as a fairly robust engine to actually create and upload your own. Cue griping about why this wasn’t in the game to begin with and all that, but regardless, that’s pretty damned cool.
TECMO BOWL THROWBACK
XBL
4/28
800 MS pts
It’s a remake of the only football game that has ever mattered. Aside from not having the NFL license, the gameplay has not been altered, except to give it an optional coat of HD paint.
Fuck John Madden.
ROCK BAND TUESDAY
Busted – Thunderbirds Are Go!
Flyleaf – Again
Silverchair – Tomorrow
(Individual tracks are $1.99/160 MS pts)
That Busted track not being in Lego Rock Band is puzzling, since short of being 7 years old, that Busted track isn’t fit for human consumption.
Evanescence and Lacuna Coil are in the game now, Flyleaf. Your services are no longer required.
Silverchair grew up into an objectively great band. Tomorrow is an objectively mediocre song. If you were a teenager in the 90s, both these facts are overridden. You’re buying this track. You know you sang it at some point. Don’t even lie to me. You know that’s going to be a hit at whatever lameass party you play it during. You know you’ll be singing it for hours afterward. And you’ll have a ball. Just buy it. No one will judge you. It’s okay. I’m here. Do you need a hug? Fuck you, no hug. You’re buying the song. Suck it up. Take your cheap Aussie grunge injection like a man.