THE WEEK OF APRIL 13th 2010

GROUP EDITED by: TROY ANDERSON

DVD/BR SECTION by: Troy Anderson

PIRATE RADIO
Director: Richard Curtis
Universal

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Special Features

  • Commentary
  • Featurettes
  • Deleted Scenes
  • and more!


Pirate Radio was manhandled by Universal’s marketing department during its theatrical run. A couple of name changes, some schedule bumping and a simple twist of fate lead to a limited screen dump. While the British heavy cast might scare away the American mainstream, those that love musical fan wank will dig it. Nick Frost, Branagh, Hoffman and Nighy turn in admirable performances.

THE SLAMMIN’ SALMON
d. Kevin Heffernan

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Special Features

  • Commentaries
  • Featurette

The Slammin’ Salmon is not the best Broken Lizard movie. That honor still belongs to Super Troopers. Mixing the usual humor with a dash of Glengarry Glen Ross offers something different than usual for the comedy troupe. But, it misses the focused direction of the Indian guy. I know that it’s terrible to refer to Jay Chandrasekhar as the Indian guy, but that’s how the average fan identifies him. Broken Lizard should rely on their default Gilliam and let the guy’s directing talents prosper. Olivia Munn also stars, but there’s no nudity.

THE GREAT MOUSE DETECTIVE
d. Ron Clements and John Musker

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Special Features

  • Game
  • Featurettes
  • Sing-Along

The Great Mouse Detective didn’t reinvent the wheel. But, it helped to introduce computer animation to Disney. Vincent Price offers up admirable voice work for what turned into the directorial debut of Disney powerhouses Musker and Clements. There’s a lack of focus, too short of a running time and it’s humbled by a weak hero. It’s considered to be one of the lost Disney classics, as most fans tend to black out that period between The Rescuers and The Little Mermaid.

2010 WINTER OLYMPICS VANCOUVER HIGHLIGHTS
c. Shaun White, Apolo Ohno, Johnny Weir, and Lindsey Vonn

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Special Features

  • Behind-the-Scenes footage

The Spring is such an odd time for DVD releases. You’ll hit patches where the major studios and the indies just leave open. There’ll be a few biggie reissues, classic revisits and major dumps that litter the store shelves. It’s all an effort to help the major titles from Q1 to sale at top dollar before Q2 starts. This NBC highlight reel for the Winter Olympics is being considered a major release this week. Will it get a Blu-Ray offering? Not really. Do you actually get to see all of the choice moments? Nope. But, the average consumer will pick it up and try to use it as reference material. I hate this time of year and I desperately wait for the better titles to start trickling out next week and through June.

NETFLIX INSTANT VIEW (POURING THE DIRT INTO BLOCKBUSTER’S GRAVE)

New movies to watch instantly
New TV to watch instantly

VIDEO GAMES

section by: Justin Clark and SCOTT!


SPLINTER CELL CONVICTION
360, PC, DS
4/13
$59.99
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Splinter Cell‘s possibly the most frustrating series on the market right now. On paper, you have Michael Ironside growling while snapping necks for 7 hours for the good of the nation. In reality, it’s 7 hours of snail-pacing your way through narrrow corridors, waiting 30 minutes for a kill that probably triggers some sort of alarm, forcing you to start levels over, and possibly the player kicking a small animal across a room in frustration. With Conviction, Ubi Soft seems to finally get the hint that fun might be a good thing to add, and has set out to make a dynamic, fast-paced, cinematic experience that has Sam Fisher actually able to stalk and hunt his enemies, not live in constant, plodding fear of them. Comparisons have been made between this and 24. In terms of video games, let’s hope that’s where the comparison ends.

OOOH: ON THE DLC TIP

GTA IV: EPISODES FROM LIBERTY CITY
PS3, PSN, PC
$19.99 each as DLC; $39.99 Retail
4/13

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Better late than never, I suppose. Not to disparage the actual Episodes themselves–I’ve yet to hear an unkind word about Ballad of Gay Tony, and Lost and Damned completely obliterates the need for a Sons of Anarchy game–but if the fat stack of copies of GTA IV I’ve witnessed at multiple Gamestops these past two months are any indication, we may be past the point where PS3 gamers care. Rockstar did themselves a favor though: The retail disc doesn’t require the original game. Which is equally awesome since downloading from the PSN is like watching turtles fuck.

FINAL FIGHT: DOUBLE IMPACT
XBL, PSN
$9.99/800 MS points
4/14 360, 4/15 PS3


Among some circles, I could be hanged for saying this may very well be my release of the month. To those bastards, I say I regret that I have but one live to give for old school beat ’em ups. Final Fight‘s still an immense amount of fun after all these years, and the DLC release not only including a metric ton of bonuses and goodies (though the fantastic arranged soundtrack from the Sega CD port doesn’t seem to be among them, sadly), but online co-op and obscure arcade gem Magic Sword thrown up for the hell of it should make a damn strong case when you flip off the first guy who gives that quizzical puppy dog “Baroo?” look when you explain why you’re not playing Splinter Cell.


ROCK BAND TUESDAY

Serj Tankian – Empty Walls
Serj Tankian – Sky is Over +
Smash Mouth – All Star +

The Used Pack 01 ($5.49/440 MS points)

  • Blood on My Hands
  • Born to Quit
  • The Taste of Ink

($1.99/160 MS points per track)

+–Available in Lego Rock Band

Serj Tankian solo: Tastes great, less crazy. What i wouldn’t give for Harmonix to cut to the chase and give us that first amazing System of a Down album as DLC, but Tankian on his own has put out solid, thoughful stuff. Not sure if its stuff worth downloading and playing, though, considering I haven’t touched Beethoven’s Cunt since it came out, and yes, I immediately regret phrasing it that way. 

I’m sure the Used pack will make someone’s 14 year old brother very happy.

If you know someone with All Star on their hard drive….beat them.
 
That is all.


MUSIC

section by: Jeb Delia

EMOTION & COMMOTION

Jeff Beck


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Rock musicians who branch off into jazz or classical music often go aground due to a lack of chops, or of vision: their great inspiration will turn out to be something that Mahler or Miles Davis or The Moody Blues were doing before they were born. That kind of thing has never been a problem for Beck: his muscular playing runs over any contradictions through sheer force of will, and he’s no more likely to defer to a 60-piece orchestra than he was to Rod Stewart. His take on “Nessun Dorma” won’t make you forget “Beck’s Bolero,” but “Elegy For Dunkirk” makes you think you might have underestimated the score from Atonement. The new original tunes aren’t particularly memorable, but there’s enough musical inventiveness in the adaptations to carry you through. In addition, Beck’s always been a great accompanist when it suits him, and he gives solid support to the female lead vocals here (including Joss Stone on a surprisingly unmannered “I Put A Spell On You”). And thanks to Jeff, there is now a bit more wah-wah in a world that could use it.


LEAVE YOUR SLEEP

Natalie Merchant

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If I tell you that Natalie Merchant has decided to record an album of flowery, sensitive poetry over lush, sensitive arrangements, you’d probably ask what the hell was new. Ah, but what if I told you she used poems from the 19th and 20th centuries, and did it over two entire CD’s? Thirty songs’ worth, with lyrics drawn from such English lit stalwarts as Charles Manley Hopkins, Edward Lear, and Robert Louis Stevenson. The tunes are invariably well-crafted, the musical settings leavened with a bit of Celtic, a taste of Cajun, some hot jazz, a touch of chamber strings, even something that imagines itself to be reggae. But it’s certainly easy-listenable, Merchant’s voice hasn’t lost anything in the six years since her last recording, and if she ever played siren to your particular musical sensibilities, this should draw you like a doomed sailor (a Poetry 101 allusion seems appropriate here). And I might just keep the CD for the cover picture alone.

ACHIN’ AND SHAKIN’

Laura Bell Bundy

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