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Yeah, my Prom photo’s not like
most people’s, but it looks really nice on the
mantle next to my Homecoming picture of me and
my date, Vietnam.
Is Owen becoming the 3,485th
member of The Nation’s Punched™
or the 32,909th inductee into The Squadron
of the Police Pumped®? You decide.
“My mom always said never
to talk to strangers who are puppeteering a
hollowed-out Suzy Maxwell at the playground.”
All was fine on the set of Signs
until the members of Max Fischer’s Assassination
Club showed up and blasted little Kieran Culkin
to fragments.
“Speak up, I can barely
hear you. What was it you said about the secret
whereabouts of D.B. Sweeney and Noah Hathaway?”
From the police sketch artist’s
work, they were able to apprehend the fugitive
known to his victims as Handless Club-Footed
Nondescript James.
Owen does his best impersonation of James Dean
with a shattered nose.
Among his many gifts (including
screenwriting, acting, and fireproofing the
home), Owen Wilson’s greatest skill was discovering
the true names of mannquins. Here he identifies
Rebecca, Pierre, and the aptly named Orange
Mallgazer.
“Luke, Wes, Owen… you
guys go ahead and get rich and famous. I’ll
wait here.”.
From his perch on high, Leonard
could only watch in horror as his loved ones
were slowly devoured by the rabid and extremely
dangerous Sally Kellerman.
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