Welcome to “Dear…”, a series of micro-letters addressed to persons, places or things that need some good addressin’ to.

Without further ado…(ahem):

Dear Whole Foods Market,
I understand that everysinglething in your market is good for me, but do you really have to charge so much for my health?

-me

Dear Vegetarianism,
Your food tastes like suck, so I’m switching back to eating like any regular “normal” person would.

-me

Dear Jon Arbuckle,
He will always eat your lasagna.

-me

Dear Marvel Comics,
Does every new or resurrected/returning character have to have claws?

-me

Dear Overpriced/High-End Movie Cineplex,
If you have armrests that fold up into the seats, please make sure the cup holder does not hang low enough to stick out from in between said seats when folded up and bonks us tall people in the head when we lean over.

-me