STUDIO: Sinful Mermaid
MSRP: $24.95
RATED:  Not Rated
RUNNING TIME: 91 Minutes

The Pitch

Tits sell anything.

Restoration Pegging.

The Humans

Hannelore Auer, Jacques Herlin, Harald Leipnitz, Paul Loewinger and Willy Millowitsch

The Nutshell

The Hostess Also Likes to Blow the Horn is
a dated erotic comedy. Two actors have dashed across the central European countryside, while trying to keep their wits. They use their last few coins to purchase an Inn where they plan to fleece the local villagers. The problem is that a neighboring Baron has decided to tax the hell out of everything. Naturally, this leads to risque humor.

The Lowdown

The local Baron desperately wants to marry the Countess. So, he raises taxes on everyone to help woo the lady. We return to the two actors from before, as they try to find a way to work around the tax hike. Meanwhile, the real heir to the Count title appears and wants vengeance. The Baron won’t have any of this, so that’s what causes everyone’s path to mesh.

The Hostess Also Likes to Blow the Horn takes
the old adage that rape can raise the stakes for any story and flips its on its ear. By ear, I mean its chest…as it then gets the shaft hard and fast. Euro-trash cinema fans will recognize Rosalba Neri and Glenn Saxson, but most readers will only recognize the scenes that sport full-frontal. The scenes are interchangeable, as the fucking gives way to a few lines of dialogue to forward the plot. If you’re worried, things work out well in the end.

German cult film director Franz Antel made a name for himself directing these hostess films. That’s like being proud of a career spent directing commercials for a local Maytag repairman. There’s no skill to the shots or story, as everything plays out like some third-rate softcore house trying to cross-breed Jess Franco with Merchant Ivory. What also strikes me as weird is the fact that this seems to be an Italian print. So many of these low-rent films traded hands time and time again through the 1960s and 1970s. What I don’t get is what happened to its original German cut?

When you get past the thirty minute marker, you realize that there’s no major plot developments. So, you’re back to watching the ol’ in and out. For some reason, these films must be making a cult comeback or Sinful Mermaid attended a liquidation sale. I’ve reviewed three or four of these titles in the last six months at CHUD and they all could pass for the same film. As a sub-genre of cult cinema, European hospitality softcore porn has let me down. For shame.

The Hostess Also Likes to Blow the Horn is a film that comes to DVD with jack to show. The A/V Quality is pretty decent for a film of this age. But, the audio feels like a mono track that was recorded in a seedy toilet. There seemed to be a picture gallery stuck away in the main menu. Since when did seeing a few stills count as a special feature?

The Package

with no special features. There is nothing that will make you spend the intense effort needed to hunt down this flick. Brick and mortar stores aren’t an option to pick up this flick. So, you’re left with buying it through the CHUD Amazon link. Have fun.

Thriller? No…I just let her grab One Eye.

3.5 out of 10