THE 12 DAYS OF CHUDMAS – DAY 3

It’s
the holidays and we’re feeling it even here in the Sewer. This year
we’re taking stock of the many gifts we’ve gotten from the movies over
the years and celebrating them in the form of a Christmas carol. In our
own special way.

While
the traditional 12 Days of Christmas counts up from one, we think it’s
more fun to count down between now and the big day (and yeah, we built
in some slack for ourselves). So sit back and get ready for some great
moments from some great CHUD favorites, and some possible holiday gift
ideas while we’re at it.

On the third day til Christmas my true CHUD sent to me…

Three paintballers beheaded

At this point you MUST have figured out that the 12 Days of CHUDmas is just a thinly veiled excuse for us to write about some of our favorite movies. That means you’ve been wondering to yourself ‘How long is it going to take for Faraci to write another article about Planet of the Apes or Friday the 13th?’

Good news!

Conventional wisdom holds Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter to be the best Jason Voorhees outing, but as I get older I find that I’m more in love with the end of the trilogy which began with Corey Feldman shaving his head. Part VI: Jason Lives picks up after Feldman’s character grows up and goes to a mental institution (which takes place in Part V: A New Beginning, the second F13th to feature no Jason). He’s haunted by the spectre of Jason Voorhees, so he heads to the cemetary to make sure the retarded serial killer is actually dead. It turns out that Jason is in fact highly decomposed worm food – but not for long. An errant lightning strike resurrects the killer,and he immediately punches the heart out of Welcome Back Kotter‘s Horschack (Ron Palillo!).

This is where our CHUDmas gift comes in. Jason is let loose on the world again, and this time he’s unfettered by things like ‘reason,’ ‘logic’ or ‘physics,’ and writer/director Tom McLoughlin gets the potential for fun. Wandering in the woods, Jason comes upon a corporate group playing paintball; one guy gets killed for his machete, which Jason then uses to lop the heads off of three paintballers in one fell swoop! It’s amazing.

Don’t go buy the old Friday the 13th  box set that Paramount has on shelves right now – the studio is rereleasing the series in new special editions. Parts 1, 2 and 3 (in 3D!) are available for pre-order right now; I have reliable word that 4, 5 and 6 are on the way. Let’s see if they bother doing 7 and 8 (the last of the Paramount Fridays).

In the meantime, here’s the best gift I can give you – my 10 Days of 13: CHUD Goes to Crystal Lake. This is probably my favorite feature ever, and I’m working on a blockbuster follow-up to it (not similar in terms of genre, but it will murder it in terms of obsessiveness needed to complete it). I hope you enjoy these.

Friday the 13th (1980)

Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)

Friday the 13th Part 3 (1982)

Supplement: Freddy vs Jason (2003)