As you may or may not know, Sylvester Stallone has been a busy little bee lately.  Even though his latest effort, Walter Hill’s Bullet To The Head, graced screens a mere two months ago, Sly already has three other films in the can:  Escape Plan, Grudge Match, and Reach Me.  The middle effort, an action comedy with De Niro about boxing, was recently pushed back to January.  The latter is a small drama that will in all likelihood end up with a limited theatrical run and/or going VOD sometime in early 2014.  The former is the one I am here to talk about right now.

Does the title sound familiar?  I doubt it does.  The film previously was going under the moniker The Tomb, which is honestly a far better (and less generic) title.  The title “Escape Plan” just wreaks of DTV work and sounds like the kind of film you would expect to see Cuba Gooding Jr or a WWE “Superstar” top-lining at your local Redbox.  This, fortunately, is not the case.  Escape Plan will tell the tale of world-class architect of prisons named Ray Breslin (what a gloriously cliche Stallone name!) who….wait for it….is framed for a crime he did not commit and locked up inside his latest escape-proof creation.  Once inside, he naturally must figure a way to bust out and prove his innocence.  Mr. Sly and the family Stallone is our lead and his expendable pal Arnold Schwarzenegger is backing him up as (I’m assuming) one of the few inmates who helps him in his quest.  They are also journey in their incarcerated shenanigans by Jim “Jesus” Caviezel, Amy “Shitty mother” Ryan, Vinnie “Stay down Boris” Jones, 50 “Blood On The Sand” Cent, Vincent “Edgar Suit” D’Onofrio, Faran “prissy Cobra Commander” Tahir, and Sam “Possession” Neil, among others.

Escape Plan, directed by Mikael Hafstrom, has also been moved up a week and will hit theaters on September 13, which is likely close to the time that Sly plans to begin production on The Expendables 3*.  Still not enough Stallone for you?  Fear not!  He has written and produced an actioner for Jason Statham called Homefront (2014) that managed to score James Franco and Winona Ryder(?!?) as its villains.  Beyond that, he has a slate of other films in various stages of development:  Hunter, Rambo 5, No Rest For The Wicked, etc.  Whether you like it or not, Sylvester Stallone** is here to stay for the foreseeable future.

The Tomb

I double dog dare you to drop the soap.

Source | Moviehole

* – Speaking of which, Wesley Snipes is officially out of the clink, so you might as well assume he is on board this particular testosterone wagon…and probably as the villain with some ridiculous name like “Ice” Cade Uphill.

** – Arnold has a busy slate as well, unless something changes:  Escape Plan (2013), Ten (2014), presumably The Expendables 3 (2014), Unknown Soldier (2015), and The Legend of Conan (2015).  And that’s not even including the likes of Triplets, Terminator 5, Captive, and Cry Macho.