I have to admit that I used to dig Jackie Chan’s schtick back in the old days where his dexterity and ingenuity took center stage and allowed his films to be fun and great party experiences where everyone gasped at how next the guy would implement a household item or somehow not die from the physical torment he put himself through.
It wore off though. Numerous shitty American films and the fact that there’s only so many times we can be stunned by the same old thing coupled with the amazing folks to come into the scene both influenced by Chan or boasting their own skill set made Jackie seem more and more like a dinosaur. Somehow there was always a Rush Hour or Shanghai Noon film to keep him in the public eye, even though at their best those were mindless bits of entertainment that you felt cheap for watching [or even liking] but did it for the common good whether that be rewarding Chan for his Hong Kong work, Chris Tucker for his rise through comedy, or Owen Wilson for his indie successes (and fabulous nose). We knew that they weren’t all that good but assumed they were built with noble intentions.
Now here comes Jackie Chan saying that he doesn’t like the films, doesn’t find them funny, and only did it for the money. He’s not saying that he was disappointed in how they turned out, he’s saying that they were never good. He’s saying that he took his fans’ money, promoted the films by lying through his teeth, and that the folks who are fans of those films are idiots with no sense of humor.
Now, on principle I sort of agree. The films pretty much suck a dick. In fact, many of Chan’s Chinese films suck a dick. But he’s basically shitting on his fans and that to me is a big time no-no.
Fuck you, Jackie.
Fuck you and your entourage of stunt performers who look to you as a god. The Rush Hour films are AT BEST annoying guilty pleasures and I’m not proud to have given them my dollars but I gave them primarily for you. Boy was that dumb.
Fuck you, Jackie.
For not keeping your mouth shut and being respectful that the films you hate have allowed you even further financial flexibility. Not all of us have so many opportunities to sell out.
Fuck you, Jackie.
For being such a smug dick. You are a grown man and have to realize that there are some things you should just keep to yourself.
Fuck you, Jackie.
May you forever burn in spiraling torment in your Cannonball Run car, tenth billed in an American film behind a bunch of over-the-hill shitstormed celebrities.
The Rush Hour films do suck, but you should have used your so-called clout and done what you could to keep them from being so. Bashing them is insulting to anyone who has bought a ticket to your American films, a mistake I’ll never make again.