A Nice Hard Slap – Doppeltracheotomygängers!!
There’s a pilot for a Sci-Fi Original Series in here somewhere…
was at lunch the other day and saw a dead ringer for a friend of mine.
I mean, a serious dead ringer. Same bone structure, hairstyle, height,
frame, and even the same sparkle to the eye. Except they had a
tracheotomy tube sticking from their neck. Pretty fucking weird.
Then, two days ago I saw Sarah Silverman. At least the Crisis on Infinite Earths version of Sarah Silverman,
the one with a tracheotomy tube sticking out of her neck. Two
lookalikes. Two necktubes. Something is happening beneath the
surface of the fabric of reality and I Want To Believe.
The new X-Files
movie would have tripled its business if Fox and Dana researched the
secret strain of doppelgängers, this race of seemingly
innocuous human beings with a breezeway in the throat. These
superficially harmless beings who have ingratiated themselves into
society, living amongst us but with a new hole all their own. To
breathe the future air of a defeated ozone layer? To communicate with
the Mother Brain on Zebes? To sip Mountain Dew without mussing the lip
gloss? My research is incomplete, though I will return to Outpost 31
once the mess is cleaned up with the snow and the base and the dogs and
the meantime I feel it’s my task to warn you that there’s a very good
chance that there’s another you out there. Resting. Thinking. Breathing
painlessly through their amazing throathole. Each of us has a
Doppeltracheotomygänger. If you find it, kill it first. There
will be no second chance.
Nick Nunziata has a stoma ache.
I go, here’s the latest thing I’m adding to the blog. Each day I blog I’ll
have a song, a piece of artwork, a photo, a Mary Worth, or something to
further justify your click and to give the trolls a little more ammo. Today, an old PKG instrumental, Last Transmission. The last track from The All Devouring Beast, circa 2004.