The B Action Movie Thread

[Hans Gruber's EYE CONDITION!]

GET DOWNNNN THERES A BOMB IN THE TRASH RECEPTACLE

"Heh welcome to new york!"

[Russell Faraday]

BABYLON A.D. continues to give off a distinct whiff.

"CHARLIEYURGONNABEWEARINTHATCHAIRUPYOURASS!!!"

"Jesus Christ, CHARLIE!!"

All the man did was blow up a chair leg. Chill the fuck out!

[ED209]

You guys have me laughing out loud in my cubicle remembering these lines from DH3.

I really wish they would have brought some of those supporting NYPD characters like Cobb and Charlie back for the fourth DIE HARD.

[kain424]

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

Seagal must've just finished eating a large meal, because he only got like 6 words out.

Couple points I hadn't brought up yet:

Really dug kain's An Eye For An Eye killcount, as well as the use of that awesome piece of music from the film. Love that music, and wish I could find it.

Always wondered why that broad was behind the dude when Matrix and Cook bust into that other motel room. Glad to see someone finally highlighted that.

Yeah, I did too... as well as why she had those ridiculously-sized breasts... but then, I figure that's for another article. Glad you dug the killcount, by the way.

Originally Posted by Fat Elvis

Conan just leap-frogged over Total Recall to become my third favorite Schwarzenegger flick. (Had not seen it in close to a decade) All bow down to the genius (madness) of John Milius.

Now i fall asleep to the commentary track.

It's my FIRST favorite Arnie flick. And how could you fall asleep to that commentary? It's classic!

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

And he saved his life with his magic too. As well as taking out that guy with the spear.

Oh, you guys. For one, Arnie has no way of knowing that Mako is gonna stand with them. For another, Subotai kills that guy after Mako makes him fall off his horse from spearing him.

I like that little "Eww!" groan that Mako makes after shoving the shield away with the snake-arrow in it.

[Crazy Jim]

Originally Posted by ED209

As for the DIE HARD: WITH A SHITTY ENDING, I remember hearing that they tossed around one idea that had the terrorists get away on a plane, before being blown up by that suitcase bomb in the park. Remember when that terrorist (played by Tony Halme, Ludvig Borga from WWF fame) wanted to leave the bomb on the street, but then doesn't because some kid found it. Well, somehow that bomb gets on the plane and blows them up as they get away.

They opted against using it because it really had nothing to do with McClaine.

That ending sounds exactly like the one from Last Boy Scout. And Ludvig Borga was in this movie? I'll have to look for him when I next watch it.

[ED209]

Yeah, I'm not sure where or when I had read about that ending, but I'm pretty sure I didn't dream it.

As for Halme/Borga, he's pretty big in Finland. Just type "Tony Halme" into YouTube and you get lots of great Borga clips (including ones where he complains about how polluted Detriot), an unbelievable Finnish rap song he made a few years back, and a clip from an old UFC fight where he loses to Randy Couture in about a minute and a half.

I think he was also a member of Finnish parliament.

[wadew1]

BORGA! I didn't even know he was a wrestler. He's the sissy meathead guy disguised as a cop who wants to leave the suitcase bomb from the 'water jug incident' on a sidewalk.

Thank god for the other considerate german terrorist!

"SOME KID COULD--!!"

[Hans Gruber's EYE CONDITION!]

Originally Posted by Russell Faraday

"CHARLIEYURGONNABEWEARINTHATCHAIRUPYOURASS!!!"

"Jesus Christ, CHARLIE!!"

I've been a fan of DHWAV since before DVDs were around and before I could see that the subtitles of the scene actually say "Christ Almighty!" For the longest time I thought Walter Cobb yells out "RACE CARS!!!" when Charlie blows up the chair. It sounds like it too!

[EdHocken]

I just remember Die Hard 3 as being the last major movie I can think of that featured the old NYPD uniform before they changed to the current one.

[Russell Faraday]

Leon star Jean Reno has been rushed to hospital after suffering a serious heart attack, according to reports.

The 60-year-old was on holiday on the Caribbean island of St Barts with his wife Zofia Borucka when he was taken ill on Thursday.

The couple had been staying at the home of French singer Johnny Hallyday.

Reno was airlifted to Fort-de-France hospital. No further details on his condition were available as WENN went to press.

LEON NOOOOO

Edit: Had no idea he was 60.

[Russell Faraday]

A truly worthwhile piece of IMDB trivia:

The line "Yipee-ki-yay, motherfucker!" is used in all of the Die Hard movies

And what the hell?!

Sean Connery was John McTiernan's very first choice for the role of Simon Gruber. He turned down the role, saying that he didn't want to play such a diabolical villain.

But a mere 3 years later he was happy to play the most diabolical of villains in THE AVENGERS?

Not saying I would have preferred Connery but double standards Sean!

[felix]

Actually that Variety review of BABLYON AD makes me intrigued with it. Seems to be loads of action and I am a big fan of European Sci-fi.

[Russell Faraday]

Calm down folks, he's ok!

Latest: French actor Jean Reno's 'heart attack' was actually a bout of heartburn and gastroenteritis, according to his publicist.

Reports suggested the Leon star had been rushed to the Fort-de-France hospital on Martinique on Wednesday night after suffering a "serious" cardiac arrest on the Caribbean island of St. Barts.

But his publicist, Christina Papadopoulos, the fuss was nothing more than the result of "too much spicy Caribbean food".

No man can resist that spicy Caribbean grub.

The biggest insult is this though:

The Pink Panther star was at Hallyday's retreat when he fell ill.

The Pink Panther star

The Pink Panther star

Come on!

[felix]

Unfortunately, Reno may wish he was dead when Pink Panther 2 comes out in 2009. Agghh...that teaser trailer.

P.S- AICN seems to love DEATH RACE. Check out their reviews.
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/38016

[Hans Gruber's EYE CONDITION!]

He'll always be the JUST VISITING star to me!

[Russell Faraday]

I'm dreading the day the PINK PANTHER 2 teaser and DISASTER MOVIE trailer are paired together.

Beaks took a steaming dump on DEATH RACE.

[Russell Faraday]

Vin "Don't fuck with me" Diesel takes on the summer blockbuster crowd.

[mr_adam]

I watched the final battle the other night, i'VE been meaning to watch it for ages and I really liked it, but weirdly young reno reminded me of Devin.

[The Perfect Weapon]

Originally Posted by felix natalya

P.S- AICN seems to love DEATH RACE. Check out their reviews.
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/38016

Well, it IS AICN, a site that I really place no faith in. Would you trust someone named "Massawyrm"? I wouldn't!

Someone I trust a lot more, Andrew Kasch, ripped it apart in his Dread Central review. He is someone who loathes Paul W.S. Anderson, admittedly-he once said that he wanted to blast him to the sun-but it's still a review I take creedence in.

On a lighter note, earlier tonight I went to the Virgin MegaStore at Downtown Disney at Walt Disney World. I don't know if it's at all Virgin stores or just this one, but they had Vern's Seagalogy book on sale for 10 bucks. Not having gotten it before, I had to get it then. I'll read it eventually... and it will also give me motivation to start watching more of Seagal's flicks.

[Russell Faraday]

You've made a considerably wise decision, Perfect Weapon.

[felix]

Originally Posted by The Perfect Weapon

Well, it IS AICN, a site that I really place no faith in. Would you trust someone named "Massawyrm"? I wouldn't!

Someone I trust a lot more, Andrew Kasch, ripped it apart in his Dread Central review. He is someone who loathes Paul W.S. Anderson, admittedly-he once said that he wanted to blast him to the sun-but it's still a review I take creedence in.

I didn't say I believed it. Just making an observation. I am pretty skeptical about AICN myself. Especially Harry.

As for DEATH RACE, I am going to reserve judgement till I've actually seen it this weekend. I don't especially loathe Paul Anderson (Except for AVP). He's pretty much an average Director that unfortunately has been tasked with some very popular franchises.

Is DEATH RACE as bad as they say? We'll have to see.

[ED209]

Hans: Just got around to watching the first few episodes of the B Action Showcase. Good stuff! Keep it up!

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

AICN is major overload in hyperbole, especially from Knowles. It's surprising that he didn't really like Clone Wars. He seems to love every flick he reviews.

Today I went to Hastings after depositing my last Dish Network check, and I picked up 6 flicks taking advantage of the 2 plus 1 for a penny, also because my girlfriend wanted Beauty Shop 1 and 2, as well as the Bratz movie. I found the first Beauty Shop, as well as Bratz, and that one I got for a penny.

My haul was

Executive Decision $6.99
I Still Know What You Did Last Summer $6.99
Signs $3.99
Sling Blade $3.99

Pretty good deals on all of them. I'm also bidding on a copy on E-Bay of The Glimmer Man.

Thanks for the friend request on Myspace, Hans. You have been approved. Now we can spread the B-Action Thread to Myspace hopefully, and turn those emos into fans of action, or they'll simply morph into many many copies of Bennet.

[Crazy Jim]

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

I Still Know What You Did Last Summer $6.99

I love seeing Hewitt jumping up and down in the rain as much as the next warm-blooded male (maybe more so) but probably not worth $6.99.

[Russell Faraday]

Wait, there was a BEAUTY SHOP 2?

This isn't strictly B-Action but I'm stuck and turning to you fine folk for advice. There's a 2 for £20 t-shirt sale on and I've settled on Rambo but can't decide between retro JAWS and GREMLINS.

Either? Neither? I know it's not my place to ask for clothing advice and I could take this to the 'Pop Culture' shirts topic, but anyone got any opinions? Yeah I know some think it's "sad" to be buying shirts like this but I know what I like.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

Originally Posted by Crazy Jim

I love seeing Hewitt jumping up and down in the rain as much as the next warm-blooded male (maybe more so) but probably not worth $6.99.

I found a copy at Big Lots for $3, but the disc was loose, and it was the only one they had there.


Russell, go for *Larry David "bingo voice"* Giiiiizzzzzzzmmmmooooooo!!!!!!!

[ED209]

Originally Posted by Russell Faraday

Wait, there was a BEAUTY SHOP 2?

This isn't strictly B-Action but I'm stuck and turning to you fine folk for advice. There's a 2 for £20 t-shirt sale on and I've settled on Rambo but can't decide between retro JAWS and GREMLINS.

Either? Neither? I know it's not my place to ask for clothing advice and I could take this to the 'Pop Culture' shirts topic, but anyone got any opinions? Yeah I know some think it's "sad" to be buying shirts like this but I know what I like.

I really don't like either. If I had to lean one way though, it would be toward the JAWS one.

If you want a really cool, semi-action themed shirt. Go with this MAGNUM PI one.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

There's no other 80's action shirts? Surely there's got to be a Commando one somewhere on that site.

[Hans Gruber's EYE CONDITION!]

My big recent Big Lots get was the Space Quest collection. All 6 wacky games in the series. They were my favorite when I was a wee.

[ED209]

I picked up that series not too long ago, but haven't played much of it yet. I was a big fan of the LucasArts games myself and always found the Sierra games to be too difficult.

[Russell Faraday]

Wow INVASION USA. They must have commissioned this when it was 'cool' to like Chuck.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

They really should have used the original poster art. That shirt is pretty shitty.

[Russell Faraday]

Real nifty poster. Quality tagline as well.

[Russell Faraday]

Ended up getting the GREMLINS shirt, and while I was in spending mood picked up special edition of TOTAL RECALL for a decent 4 quid. Looking forward to Arnie/Verhoeven commentary.

[Moltisanti]

Originally Posted by Russell Faraday

Wow INVASION USA. They must have commissioned this when it was 'cool' to like Chuck.

WAIT JUST A GOSH DARN MINUTE!

The quote on that shirt isn't from INVASION USA, it's from BRADDOCK: MISSING IN ACTION III.

Anyone who has purchased that shirt has been bamboozled. Big time.

Proof: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvK3Cj5i1Fs

I've fired off a stern email to the absent-minded folks at 80stees.com. If they don't take that shirt off the site in 48 hours I'll see them in court. Even though I have absolutely no legal recourse to sue them over this at all. Doesn't matter.

[Russell Faraday]

That's actually pretty shocking. How many people are walking around blissfully unaware they're sporting what is effectively a MISSING IN ACTION III shirt?

If 80stees spent less time making "GIZZY IS THE SHIZZY" shirts they'd maybe pick up on stuff like this.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

Moltisanti: Attorney at law for Golan + Globus corp.

[Crazy Jim]

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

I found a copy at Big Lots for $3, but the disc was loose, and it was the only one they had there.

I could give you that $3 might be worth it but $7? I mean, I've probably asked this more than a few times but outside of JLH looking really hot, what does this movie have going for it? Truth be told. I picked up both "I Know" movies in one of those combination deals (they were both "sealed" new but because someone probably sold them to the store, they were marked "used") at either FYE or a local used DVD bin for less than $5 and as it is, I hide them in a place where I hope nobody will ever see them. Just curious as to why you thought it was worth it?

[Russell Faraday]

I STILL KNOW... has a couple things going for it.

- Rasta Jack Black getting dispatched.

- That black guy shuffling out of the darkness towards the end. "BRASILIA"

- "Will Benson. Don't you get it? Ben son. Ben Son. Ben's Son. BEN'S SON. Benson. BEN'S SON!!"

[The Perfect Weapon]

Originally Posted by Russell Faraday

Wait, there was a BEAUTY SHOP 2?

This isn't strictly B-Action but I'm stuck and turning to you fine folk for advice. There's a 2 for £20 t-shirt sale on and I've settled on Rambo but can't decide between retro JAWS and GREMLINS.

I think you should participate in the "Top Gun" contest as mentioned in the banner ad on the top of that website. Hey, you can fly a helicopter AND an aeroplane! And all just if you can answer who was Iceman in the movie. Yes, that's the question.

80's Tees has shirts of other films we love, such as Indiana Jones, The Karate Kid, Platoon, Predator, and The Terminator.

I read the intro and the Above the Law chapter of Seagalogy. It's a fun read, to say the least.

[Russell Faraday]

A PREDATOR costume.

Sweet zombie Jesus.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

Originally Posted by Crazy Jim

I could give you that $3 might be worth it but $7? I mean, I've probably asked this more than a few times but outside of JLH looking really hot, what does this movie have going for it? Truth be told. I picked up both "I Know" movies in one of those combination deals (they were both "sealed" new but because someone probably sold them to the store, they were marked "used") at either FYE or a local used DVD bin for less than $5 and as it is, I hide them in a place where I hope nobody will ever see them. Just curious as to why you thought it was worth it?

Jeffrey Combs, Jack Black doing a shitty rasta act, it's pretty much gore galore. I dig it for the cheapness it is. Even though the plot is beyond crap and contradicts itself. I was hoping to find it cheaper, but it was part of the 2 and 1 for a penny deal, so it didn't really bother me. On the plus side, after looking at the receipt, I got Signs for a penny.

I probablt should have waited to see if I could find another copy at Big Lots for $3, but it was an impulse buy, as well as there wasn't really anything else there that was that inexpensive.

I really want that Terminator shirt with the .45 longslide quote on it.

[Moltisanti]

Wow! This Barnes PLATOON shirt is marked down to $9.99:



Tempting, but I just can't stomach supporting the dubious business practices of 80stees.com. What with the whole INVASION USA/BRADDOCK snafu.

[Keith F]

I'd rather have an Elias shirt.

"Then the worm has definitely turned for you", with him pointing the potgun at us.

There are no redeeming factors in the I Know movies, Eko. I'm pretty sure a dollar from every purchase of those flicks goes to supporting terrorism. You hate America, don't you?

[felix]

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

AICN is major overload in hyperbole, especially from Knowles. It's surprising that he didn't really like Clone Wars. He seems to love every flick he reviews.

I do recall him being rather indifferent about LXG though. But point taken. Knowles sure exaggerates about a lot of shit in his reviews.
He's the last reviewer I take seriously.

[Crazy Jim]

Originally Posted by Russell Faraday

I STILL KNOW... has a couple things going for it.

- Rasta Jack Black getting dispatched.

- That black guy shuffling out of the darkness towards the end. "BRASILIA"

- "Will Benson. Don't you get it? Ben son. Ben Son. Ben's Son. BEN'S SON. Benson. BEN'S SON!!"

Gotta disagree with all three. Rasta Jack Black getting killed means we have to deal with Jack Black doing his idiotic faux-Jamaican schtick until that happens. Bill Cobb (shuffling black guy) has been in much better films (Brother From Another Planet, New Jack City, etc.) and deserves better than this one. The Will Benson "twist"? Meh.

Saw Street Kings yesterday. Maybe if David Ayer hadn't done pretty much the same exact movie a bunch of times before with much better actors, it might have worked. The ending was jumbo predictable. It seemed like a slight variation on Dark Blue. Granted, it wasn't quite the same but it wasn't much different either. Keanu Reeves really didn't work at all. All I could think of in that opening scene where he dogs the Koreans for acting and dressing like other races was "Man, Keanu does not have the charisma to make this believable at all". Scenes like this really feel like amaetur hour if the right actor doesn't deliver the lines. Reeves can't do the "gray" cop at all.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

Almost every review that I've ever read that Knowles has done makes the flick seem like the best movie ever in the history of cinema. I'm not one to usually judge, as I usually like a lot of movies that others would proclaim utterly shitty, but I don't make them out to be masterpieces either.

[Russell Faraday]

I mock the Benson twist for the sheer idiocy of it. Ben's son! Of course! Don't question why he'd bother picking a fake name that sorta sounds like giving away his 'true identity'.

"SARAH CONNER IS MY HOMEGIRL" is pretty damn lame, and it's quite rightly been given a 1 star rating. Sort it out 80stees!

[Keith F]

A lot of people find Knowles' constant Spongebob like enthusiasm endearing. I think it's sickening. Especially when he does the sex analogy thing. It's troubling that his site is the go to site for the mainstream media, that he's the face of the internet movie fan. Fuck that guy. If it wasn't for Beaks, and maybe Vern, I wouldn't ever visit that place. I used to be in Moriarty's corner, but that super paranoid Star Wars piece turned me off. How fucking hard is it to not publish an early review when embargoes? How hard is it to understand that the movie companies want to control the information, especially considering the prequels, and they don't want all the secrets splashed across the internet?

[Crazy Jim]

Predator is on TNT right now and I can't believe they chopped out the little back and forth between Dutch and Dillion in the middle of the "If It Bleeds, We Can Kill It" setting up a trap montage. I must have seen this movie over a hundred times and it's still bad ass.