The B Action Movie Thread

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

Times like this I actually wish I had a DVR so I could set it to record flicks like that.

Just popped on the Spaghetti Western Keoma starring Franco Nero as the title character, KEOMA! Complete with his own theme song. There's some Peckinpah slow motion shootouts going on. Pretty badass.

[kain424]

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

I'm not really much for chipotle sauce, myself.

I just saw the Sly tribute video. It was FUCKING AMAZING. What was that movie the still was from with Sly singing all dressed up in weird garb. Rhinestone? Either way it was amazing. Another great one, kain!

Thanks. What'd you say to Sly in that e-mail?

All this talk of Mexican food got me to go make myself a couple tacos. Worth it so far...

I watched Jet Li's first film, The Shaolin Temple. Loved it. The fight scenes were simply amazing and I can see why Jackie Chan is gonna remake it, but I'm not quite sure who he'll play. Gonna do a write-up on it.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

I basically said that I've been a fan of his for a long time and gave him a big thumbs up for still being in the action game. I even said that I liked Eye Seen You and got the chance to see it in the theater when it was only available for about a week back in 2002.

[HunterTarantino]

Welcome to the Stallone fan mail club, Rene! Hope he replies to you.

Dorm's dead tonight cause everyone's seeing New Moon: No Matter How Dreamy We Look the Near Dark Vampires Will Eat You Any Day of the Week, I presume. Fuck them. To paraphrase Seth Rogen in Knocked Up, Twilight gargles my balls.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

That New Moon crap is getting everywhere. A few of my students said they were going to see the midnight show. My girlfriend's best friend is going to be coming down sometime soon, and she wants her to watch it with her, so I probably won't be dragged to it. Although I'm curious to see if she'd actually like it, or think it meh like she thought with the first one.

Good to hear that your dorm is free of any stray people mucking about. Be bold, Hunter. STREAK!!!!!!!

[felix]

I confess that I was a reader of all 4 Twilight books. I was insane.

I am mildly embarresed by the whole thing now.

[HunterTarantino]

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

Good to hear that your dorm is free of any stray people mucking about. Be bold, Hunter. STREAK!!!!!!!

Not with my dipshit roommate in the room.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

Your dipshit roommate didn't take the opportunity to try and scam on some poon? So not only doesn't he take a crap properly, but he's got no brains either. You figure after all that shit with his girlfriend/ex-girlfriend/whatever the fuck that broad is, he'd be scamming on the young'uns/dimwits.

felix, only mildy? I kid I kid. I've only held those books, and I could feel the unholy power coursing within that I had to drop it that I had to drop it and walk away.

[The Perfect Weapon]

All the Mexican food talk and I'm surprised no one brought up or thought about eating nachos. The last time I had them, they were at a dollar theatre in September and they were pretty much the opposite of the nachos in Death Proof (someone putting that scene on YouTube makes me laugh and laugh). They were chips from a bag and old liquid cheese. They did a number on my digestive system, I'll put it that way. One of these days I'll find some halfway decent ones, even if they don't measure to the Death Proof ones.

Oh, I feel the Twilight pain. The person who is obsessed with it is... MY MOM. That's right, not my sisters or anyone I know who is a teenage girl. She is old enough to get a senior ticket at most auditoriums and she did the double-dip of seeing the first one and then the new one at midnight; she usually goes to the bedroom to fall asleep by like 10 PM and she's staying out until after 2:30 AM to see THIS... it's mortifying. I have zero idea why she feels the way about the series but I try to not think about it.

Then again, I presume, Hunter, that most of the guys in your dorm who are gone tonight were saps who got dragged to it by their significant others. I couldn't be forced at gunpoint to see it! As for Hunter's roommate being a dipshit and not trying to get as much poontang as he can, I'll quote a line from the movie Road Trip and say, "Think about it, you're in college. The window of opportunity to drink and do drugs and take advantage of young girls is getting smaller by the day." That's the motto you should live by and follow while you can!

Anyway, that Stallone video was awesome, Kain.

[kain424]

Haven't read any of the Twilight stuff, but I did catch a lot of it on YouTube with RiffTrax. Seemed pretty bland. But then, I've not been into vampires and crap since middle school.

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

I basically said that I've been a fan of his for a long time and gave him a big thumbs up for still being in the action game. I even said that I liked Eye Seen You and got the chance to see it in the theater when it was only available for about a week back in 2002.

I wonder if he'll be like "It's D-TOX, dirtbag!"

Originally Posted by The Perfect Weapon

Anyway, that Stallone video was awesome, Kain.

Thank you.

[felix]

Personally for me Driven is one of my favourite Stallone non-Rambo/Rocky/Cash flicks.

It's corny and dumb as hell. But for some reason I dig it.

[HunterTarantino]

Originally Posted by Rene (Mr.Eko)

Your dipshit roommate didn't take the opportunity to try and scam on some poon? So not only doesn't he take a crap properly, but he's got no brains either. You figure after all that shit with his girlfriend/ex-girlfriend/whatever the fuck that broad is, he'd be scamming on the young'uns/dimwits.

felix, only mildy? I kid I kid. I've only held those books, and I could feel the unholy power coursing within that I had to drop it that I had to drop it and walk away.

Yeah, he hooked up with this not terribly attractive girl last week, which made me leave the room because I wanted nothing to do with any potential shagging that went on, which I don't think did. He also looks like an ultra-retarded Sylvester Stallone with an Oswald Cobblepot-like nose. And yet much like the protagonist of my screenplay, I can't get any action because everyone I like has a boyfriend, who's usually some hipster douche that probably quotes Wedding Crashers hourly. Fuck being just friends.

Weapon, not sure if there's any guy who I'd wish got dragged to this in my hall, except for my roommate, who's in the room. Fuck him.

Also, one of my friend's roommates is trying to coax me into coming to their room at 2 AM, so I keep antagonizing him with increasingly bizarre text messages, including one of them being about flossing with his mom's pubic hair.

[kain424]

I dunno. I've always been very pro-active in getting women. To hell with whether or not they had boyfriends.

Originally Posted by felix

Personally for me Driven is one of my favourite Stallone non-Rambo/Rocky/Cash flicks.

It's corny and dumb as hell. But for some reason I dig it.

I used to enjoy this film, but after watching it again I can hardly stand the thing. The non-stop soundtrack is probably what bugs me the most, but also the "passing-the-torch" feeling of much of the movie. Sly should've done something more deserving... like a straight-up Action flick with the same message.

[Erix]

Originally Posted by felix

I confess that I was a reader of all 4 Twilight books. I was insane.

I am mildly embarresed by the whole thing now.

And you damn well should be!

Aw what the hell... We've all done things we're not proud of. At least you're man enough to own up to it.

Still... You got through 4 of those fucking things? I could barely make it through the paragraph that was briefly sampled here a year or so back.

Originally Posted by felix

Personally for me Driven is one of my favourite Stallone non-Rambo/Rocky/Cash flicks.

Hmmm...

Originally Posted by HunterTarantino

I can't get any action because everyone I like has a boyfriend...

Welcome to the real world, my friend.

It happens.

I'm head-over-heels with the girlfriend of a good friend of mine. So that's off limits, of course. But I still feel your pain.

My advice? Just keep reminding yourself that it's open season until she has a rock on her finger. Bros before hos? Perhaps. But how many of them are really your bros?

Originally Posted by kain424

I dunno. I've always been very pro-active in getting women. To hell with whether or not they had boyfriends.

Yeah... That's just about the best attitude to have.

...

Oh... Just a little heads up guys. We're about 4 and a half pages away from a truly historic event. I hope I'm back in La Paz when it happens so I can spend the ENTIRE DAY with you fine gentlemen, joining in the festivities.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

I've felt that same pain, just like we all have. You like girl, she likes, or is with another guy. Even if the relationship is going down the drain. Those are the stupid girls, and from what I've seen, there is a hell of a lot more of them than any of us could have thought. Those broads just aren't worth wasting time on.

[felix]

It's something I am really really not proud of. I look at these Twilight books now and can't see how I they could anything but complete shit.

Driven is definitely not a good film. Fortunately I can still chuckle at it now and then whenever i see it on Cable.

I'd heard Stallone cut out 20mins worth of footage. His character was supposed to be some kind of Ace race track driver with a thing for painkillers.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

It is incredible how much shit is stuffed into the Twilight books. Those are some fat bastards. All that emo angst. Fuck that shit.

One of my students said that the movie was funny. I think she meant it was intentional. She's a superfan, so I'd expect the gushing over the book.

[duke fleed]

Felix, This is not...Oprah, this is CHUD.COM's...B-Action Movie Thread, no need to shed tears over some vampire books. Watch Blade and Blade II and you will feel better.

[Moltisanti]

Couple cover shots of DTV flicks hitting in January.

First, Berenger, Busta Rhymes, Armand Assante and Sticky Fingaz unite for BREAKING POINT:



Next, Russell Mulcahy directs Thomas Jane and Ving Rhames in GIVE 'EM HELL MALONE. Didn't sound like this one bowled them over at Comic-Con but it's now due out on 1/26:

[ForsakenNoMore]

Originally Posted by duke fleed

Felix, This is not...Oprah, this is CHUD.COM's...B-Action Movie Thread, no need to shed tears over some vampire books. Watch Blade and Blade II and you will feel better.

Spoken like a BOSS! You best listen to duke, felix. I say throw in BLADE 3 in for good measure. WHY? Jessica Biel laoding up an IPod prior to hunting vampires.

Originally Posted by Moltisanti

Couple cover shots of DTV flicks hitting in January.

First, Berenger, Busta Rhymes, Armand Assante and Sticky Fingaz unite for BREAKING POINT:

No cover art of Rico... WTF?! I'll prob still catch it. Armand Assante is the man.

[Judas Booth]

Originally Posted by kain424

I dunno. I've always been very pro-active in getting women. To hell with whether or not they had boyfriends.

Exactly. You know that YOUR girlfriends got hit on by other guys, right? It's how the game is played.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

My girlfriend told me her ex-boyfriend called her work out of the blue yesterday (and this is 3 years after) and asked for her. She didn't want to talk to him and he asked for her phone number and she told her co-worker who was on the line with him not to give it to him. She's one girl thats not going to fall for that stupid trick like others have. I can never say it enough I LOVE HER. I'm glad I have her and treat her right. Plus she's just plain awesome.

[Hans Gruber's EYE CONDITION!]

UGHUGH this thread is turning into a The View episode. Here is some news on AMERICAN GLADIATORS: THE MOVIE that I will not see because I only acknowledge old school American Gladiators like Gemini, Laser, and Nitro, not this new crap.

"American Gladiators" Movie Hires Writer
http://worstpreviews.com/headline.php?id=15856&count=0

Back in May it was announced that Johnny Ferraro, creator of the "American Gladiators" TV franchise, would be bringing a live-action adaptation of the property to the big screen.

Now comes news that Peter Iliff (Patriot Games, Varsity Blues) has been hired to write the script. Scott Mednick (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) is on board to produce and is eyeing a 2011 release for the film.

The "American Gladiators" movie will be based on the TV show that first aired in 1988 and has been on the air every year except one during the past 20 years. Most recently, NBC aired a primetime installment in 2008. Ferraro noted "American Gladiators" was originally conceived as a film, but the property "took a detour and became a TV phenomenon."

I hope they can work in clever cameos for Mike Adamle and Larry "The Zonk" Csonka.

[natalia]

Originally Posted by felix

Personally for me Driven is one of my favourite Stallone non-Rambo/Rocky/Cash flicks.

It's corny and dumb as hell. But for some reason I dig it.

I must admit I also liked Driven. Kill me now.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

We are a view, Hans. We're A VIEW TO A KILL!

[duke fleed]

Rene (Mr. Eko), I found a website, while looking for information about...Go Nagai's final Super Robot series-Shin Mazinger Z, I found the actual episodes on...animefreak.tv! You can watch...anime, subtitled for free. Shin Mazinger Z is...Awe-Inspiringly Awesome! While not a re-make in the strictest sense, Nagai took his classic...Mazinger Z characters, and created a new story for them, centered around a tale featuring...the Gods- Zeus, Hades and Posidon. Zeus is not only a hero, but he is the inspiration for Mazinger Z, as well. The hero of our story and pilot of...Mazinger Z, is Koji Kobuto (he is also included in...Ufo Robot Grendizer, and he is a friend and confidant of...Duke Fleed. Shin Mazinger Z, has already been green lit for season 2, and I do not know when this site will acquire that, but with 26 episodes of season 1, if you enjoy...Super Robot Anime, then...Shin Mazinger Z is must...Z TV!

[duke fleed]

Rene (Mr. Eko), I know you said you were thinking of buying a...Wii! Well in addition to of course...Tatsunoko vs Capcom, Sin And Punishment 2 (a rail shooter) there is another must buy for 2010! The Data East Arcade Collection. It is a compilation of 15 games, which includes...Bad Dudes vs Dragon Ninja (the ninja have kidnapped President Ronnie, and are you...Bad enough, to get the job done?), Secret Agent (2D James Bond) Heavy Barrel and many other fine games, which should be included on every action movie fan's...Wii entertainment system. TDEAC is only...$20!

Right now I am playing...Kamen Rider Dragon Knight. I never saw the series, but you wear armor, weild weapons ranging from swords to guns, and can call for help. Help can include a giant robot, or creature, to aid you in your time of need. It is a fighting game, and it is...Glorious!

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

duke fleed, that Data East Collection will definitely be a purchase for me when I buy a Wii.

[Hans Gruber's EYE CONDITION!]

That Data East collection sounds tempting but I don't have a wii! Also, only 15 games? Didn't that Sega Xbox collection have many more? And finally... where is Robocop??

[duke fleed]

Hans Gruber's EYE CONDITION!, Licensed games are always a problem in these compilations. Even...Intellivision Classics didn't have either of their terrific Advanced Dungeons and Dragons Games. The same thing happened to...Capcom Classic Collections. The missing games in those collections were their Dungeons and Dragons titles along with...The Punisher. Data East also had adaptions of Captain America and the Avengers as well as The Avengers: Galactic Storm. Anyway, the Data East Collection is a must buy for Bad Dudes and Heavy Barrel alone. Do you have a...360? Konami Classics Vol 2, with Super Contra and Castlevania Symphony Of The Night arrives in Jan 10 as well.

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

I have Captain America And The Avengers for my Super Nintendo. My Dad got it for me back in 1995 at Kay Bee's Toys. It was the last copy too. Its a really fun game. I always wanted to play that Punisher game, and I have fond memories of playing Robocop A LOT.

[HunterTarantino]

Rene, that RoboCop game was pretty sweet. Decent graphics for the time, I remember they had a machine in Point Pleasant, NJ and at an old nearby theater where I saw Dennis the Menace twice! The machine itself was surrounded by pics from the movie, and you could get your hands on the Cobra Assault Cannon! Did you have the NES version or are your memories reserved for the arcade one? Never played the Punisher game in full till I got it for MAME. For me nothing beats NARC (that game is the shiznit, it's Death Wish 3 with Charles Bronson in colored SWAT armor!) or the Konami beat 'em up holy tetralogy: Ninja Turtles, Turtles in Time, X-Men, and The Simpsons.

[duke fleed]

HunterTarantino, While I do argree with you about Konami's...TMNT and X-Men arcade titles, I would never put any game by them over...Contra. Contra is an...awesome run n' gun game. Robocop and Narc are equally great. I played...The Punisher numerous times in the arcade. You are either...The Punisher or Nick Fury, or you and a friend could play. You must take down...The Kingpin Of Crime. People say...Final Fight was better, but I disagree. Sure both games are side scrolling beat em ups by Capcom, but in addition to using knives and kung fu...Capcom's The Punisher has the latest in military hardware, probably enough to win WW I and WWII...combined!

[Rene (Mr.Eko)]

I played the arcade version, Hunter. Never had a Nintendo sadly. First thing I ever had was a Gameboy back in 1992. Then a Super Nintendo in 1994. A Playstation followed in 1997, then the firsr system I bought with my own money, Playstation 2 in 2004 as well as a Gameboy Advance the same year, and finally my awesome Playstation 3 that I got last year.

[Bobby Bear]

Originally Posted by Judas Booth

Exactly. You know that YOUR girlfriends got hit on by other guys, right? It's how the game is played.

So that's why I'm on the bench. Well, that and all the other reasons.

[kain424]

Originally Posted by Judas Booth

Exactly. You know that YOUR girlfriends got hit on by other guys, right? It's how the game is played.

Of course. My girlfriend STILL gets hit on. Funny thing about women: they don't always seem to know when a guy is coming on to them. It happens.

I watched an early Jackie Chan flick identified, depending on where you get it, as Rumble In Hong Kong, Police Women, or The Heroine. Jackie was the bad guy!

Anyone know of any other Chan flicks where he plays the villain (aside from the teenage thugs he occasionally played in Bruce Lee flicks)?

[felix]

He played a semi-bad guy in The Shinjuku Incident. His latest Chinese film.

Which is kinda suprising as Chan is a sort of a icon here in Asia. The Chinese Government supposed frowns on him taking on bad guy roles as they feel it provides a bad image example.