The Real Education of Patrick Ripoll

[Patrick Ripoll]

So I got all my college info in the mail today, with roommate list and moving date. Very excited, not gonna lie. Any do's and don'ts I should remember for the beginning of college (particularly how NOT to be asshole roommate, common mistakes of living on your own, blah blah etc.) would be awesome.

I'm lame, I know.

[Pop Zeus]

Show some restraint when that 3rd credit card company is waving free money in your face.

[Greg Clark]

If you get into your dorm room and the first thing your roommate asks you is "Have you been saved?", you might want to consider asking for a different room assignment. If you decide to give the guy a chance, next thing you know you'll be woken up by the Trinity Broadcasting Network at 4am.

[Justin Clark]

Keep your friends close, the label maker for your food closer.

[Tim N.]

Are you staying in a dorm?

[stump]

Don't just give up when it gets hard to wake up for 11AM classes. I almost stopped in my 1st and 2nd years but just trudged through it and the second half of college was fun.

Where are you going?

[Patrick Ripoll]

I'm in a 4 bedroom dorm with 3 other roommates. I'm going to Columbia College in Chicago, majoring in poverty*.

*film

[stump]

Ha! Awesome. I had a few friends over there. Is that a big school? I think I know a guy there now. Sounds like you should have a decent amount of space in your dorm, four dudes in three rooms.

My first year was fucking miserable because I was in one of those cinder block cube rooms with my best friend - the room was facing a courtyard full of retards flashing each other - we lost our minds on weed and LSD and ecstasy and we drove each other nuts. Avoid situations like that!!

[Judas Booth]

Show some restraint when that 3rd credit card company is waving free money in your face.

As a banker, I can give you the following information. Start ONE credit card for college, even if it's just a gas credit card. use it ONCE A MONTH to buy gas or something, and then PAY IT OFF every month. Occasionally, keep a balance in it and pay it off the next month. NEVER miss a payment or be late. This shows the credit bureaus that you know how to maintain a revolving line of credit and use it responsibly.

The credit bureaus look at installment and revolving credit in determining your credit score. They look at the length of time that you've had credit too, so having a card NOW, at 18 or 19, is essential to starting your history. Even if it's at a high rate with a small balance, who cares? You're going to PAY IT OFF every month. When you graduate in a few years, try and get that same card upgraded (rather than cancel it) for a better rate, since you've shown that you can use it responsibly. Upgrade it, because if you close it, you're starting your effective credit history all over again with a new card. Your credit history will simply show a 'closed credit card', which isn't as good at raising your credit score as a still open and perfect account.

If you have loans (car loans for example), move heaven and earth to pay those on time or within the grace period. This will effect your installment credit. The more of these that you have on your record, paid on time and paid OFF (especially early) really bump up your score.

I hope that helps.

[Poprob]

Find out who your resident assistant or hall director or building deputy (or whatever terminology they use) is in your first week. They'll probably hold a meeting or something for your wing or whatever. When damage happens to your room (which it will. You're dudes, after all) report it immediately. Get it fixed right away. If you wait until the end of the semester you will most likely be charged.

And congratulations.

[Scott]

Ignore the RA and all of his meetings/get-togethers the entire year. Don't let just anyone borrow a movie because you'll probably never see it again. Girls will sleep with you, but that doesn't mean they want to fuck that night. Some just don't like sleeping alone. Fuck them another night. Wear sandals to the shower. Spraying shit with hot water only makes it smell worse. Find someone that is 21 and burn bridges with him/her when you reach that age. Get your fucking homework done. Experiment with pot but only if you can filter the smell/blow it out the window effectively. Putting beer cans in the toilet and flushing them is a dick move. Break school property; you're paying for it already.

And don't fucking go home every weekend.

[Slater]

Don't get caught fucking bananas.

[Chris Anthony]

Know your dealer.

(and freerobotsex is right; no matter how hot the girl is, DON'T loan her your DVDs)

[Chris Miller]

Freerobotsex is wise. Invest in plastic cups for drinking in the dorms. Find the closest 7-11(or other convenience store) and perfect the quickest way to it, as your cafeteria only has certain hours, and you will get munchies at the exact opposite hours. Try to set up your classes to get a good sized break in the afternoon, and use that time to do homework and study, which frees up your nights for going out, or a part time job. Speaking of part time job, if your classes aren't kicking your ass too bad, get one. Waiting tables is perfect, because you walk home with cash.
Go out and have fun. Again ,as long your classes are fine, you'll regret not doing stupid shit in college.
As far as roommates go, ask what pisses everyone off early and try to avoid it. Most guys will be reasonable. For instance: smoking. If everyones a smoker, whatever, if some aren't, make sure they wont be pissed if you do, or whatever. Sounds like you have your own bedroom though, so that's nice.
Oh, and lastly, as cliche as it might sound, Ramen Noodles are your best friend.

[Tim N.]

I'm graduating next month, but I honestly can't think of anything out there anymore that isn't common sense. But here's a few:

Take early classes. I was so excited by the prospect that I could schedule classes that all started after 11 AM, but it gets really depressing when your whole afternoon is shot, and sometimes it makes it harder to remember to go to class. Schedule yourself so that you're up at 8 and done by noon. It will suck for a while, but once you're used to it, life is fucking fantastic when you're done with your responsibilites for the day by lunchtime. It honestly feels good to be up and about that early once your sleep has worn off.

Start asking around for where the good RA's are located. I was an RA for three years, and after a year of doing it, I had folks requesting to be on my hall because, well, I'm in it for the free room. I gives a damn what the residents do. Life in the dorms is much, much better once you've figured out where the good RA's are.

Half.com. It absolutely blows my mind that people still buy books at the bookstore when half.com exists. Find out what books you need about a week or two before class starts (the bookstores will let you know), and then buy them at Half for about a billionth of what they would have cost you. Then sell them back to the bookstore at the end of the year for what you paid for them, instead of for about 3 cents on the dollar like everyone else is getting.

[Jonathan Banks is my hero]

Take early classes. I was so excited by the prospect that I could schedule classes that all started after 11 AM, but it gets really depressing when your whole afternoon is shot, and sometimes it makes it harder to remember to go to class. Schedule yourself so that you're up at 8 and done by noon. It will suck for a while, but once you're used to it, life is fucking fantastic when you're done with your responsibilites for the day by lunchtime. It honestly feels good to be up and about that early once your sleep has worn off.

Different strokes for different folks. I used to load up on classes two or three days a week, and then schedule days off for myself. I don't think I had a five-day week after my freshman year.

I don't have any other advice that other people haven't already said, but I will say this: Enjoy the fuck out of these next few years. This isn't a "this is the best time of your life" speech, it's a "this will be a great fucking time, period" speech. Live it up, man.

[Anderson]

Make friends with the cafeteria workers. Most of them have been outsourced to outside companies and aren't the friendly types that have been working on campus for years.

Some of them just got out of prison and have really cool stories/scars.

[WayDen]

Different strokes for different folks. I used to load up on classes two or three days a week, and then schedule days off for myself. I don't think I had a five-day week after my freshman year.

Never take a class on Fridays - you'll end up dropping it. Some of the best drinking/partying nights are Thursdays (for whatever reason), and while you probably won't experience (serious) hangovers until you're around 23 or 24, going to sleep around 5am isn't all that helpful when you have an early class the next day.

I don't have any other advice that other people haven't already said, but I will say this: Enjoy the fuck out of these next few years. This isn't a "this is the best time of your life" speech, it's a "this will be a great fucking time, period" speech. Live it up, man.

I won't say it's the "best time of your life", but it is the last time of your life where you get away with some seriously irresponsible actions without serious consequences. Live it up!

Here's my last piece of advice*: Don't get attached to anyone too quickly. If you meet someone in your third year or something then yeah, go for it. But unless you really, honestly, truly feel like she's "the one", don't start a serious relationship in your first or second year. You just miss out on too much stuff like spring break, ski trips, and most importantly, casual drunken sex when you're attached to someone else during those years. You'll have the rest of your life to deal with serious relationships and taking significant others into consideration - why not be selfish for a couple of years?

*Before I get a bunch of grief from anyone, I would give the same advice to a female going off to college. It's just much more fun and adventurous when you're single...

[Tim N.]

Different strokes for different folks. I used to load up on classes two or three days a week, and then schedule days off for myself. I don't think I had a five-day week after my freshman year.


This is actually a great idea, too, that I totally forgot about. I did this a few semesters. As far as I know, almost all colleges have either MWF classes or T/TH classes. If you schedule yourself so that all of your classes are Tuesday and Thursday, life will be pretty bitchin'. Your Tuesdays and Thursdays will be a bitch, but then you have four-day weekends every weekend. Wednesday can be your homework day.

Also, for God's sake, don't forget about hour requirements. I finished both of my degrees a full semester early, thinking I was done with college. Not so. I was almost 30 hours short, and I had to fill my last semester to the brim with bullshit like Soccer and (as much fun as it really was) that zombie class. I ended up graduating (or will in a month) three months late. Many schools require 120 hours to graduate. I think that's 15 hours per semester. Don't slack off without making up for it the following semester.

[Tieman]

Your tuition is over $16k a year. I'm hoping your parents are assisting you with this (mine didn't). If they aren't and you have a scholarship (like me), don't fuck it up and drink away the minimum required g.p.a. your first year (like me). Graduating with $50k in loans sucks balls.

And I also definitely support WayDen's suggestion to avoid getting attached too quickly (another one of my many mistakes). Especially if you are living on campus, you will never find such a ready supply of unattached women/men ever again.

[Moltisanti]

Make peace with the fact that you have to buy your own scantrons. Can you believe that shit? YOU HAVE TO BUY YOUR OWN SCANTRONS!

[Judas Booth]

Another bit of advice: Every school has guaranteed EASY A classes, usually for the general stuff. Don't take them all at one time or you'll just have one easy semester. Space them out to balance out the killer classes.

[Tim N.]

We were provided with scantrons. We had to buy everything else, though.

[Moltisanti]

We were provided with scantrons. We had to buy everything else, though.

Man, where did you go? Heaven University?

[Dax]

Okay, you're gonna be living in a 4 bedroom dorm room with three roommates. The law of averages means that at least one of them is going to be a tremendous dick.

I had the same set-up, and our tremendous dick was a slacker named Dave. The only initiative he ever showed was on the day Kurt Cobain's death was announced...he got drunk/stoned and wrote "poetry" all over the walls of our living room.

[stump]

Alright, here's a tip. When smoking ismz, stuff an empty toilet paper or paper towel tube full with dryer fabric softener sheets and exhale through that tube. It will kill all the second hand smoke. And put a towel under your door and stuff. And don't make friends with shady dudes who tell you they can get thirty hits of e for three hundred dollars, but only if you front all the cash. Yeah, don't do that.

[Trevor]

I'm going to be the dissenter to the 'take all early classes' argument. I tried that for a semester, and I was tired all day. Ended up taking afternoon naps that negated the value of early classes (which are, ostensibly, to preserve your afternoons). Take late classes. It might be the only time in your life you'll be able to wake up past 11 every day of the week. Stay out late with your friends. Fuck the afternoons.

Some of my best college memories were of pranking the hell out of our friend who went to bed early because he took morning classes. Once, we used an entire roll of duct tape to seal him in his room while he slept.

Oh yeah, that brings me to my second thing: College is a great time to prank the living shit out of everyone you know. I guess it's cliche, but man, I do miss the joy of a well executed prank (I'm 5 years out of grad school).

[captain_oats]

I'll agree with the late classes. Those extra hours of writing or studying the day of a due date for an assignment of exam are worth their weight in gold.

[stump]

I agree with that morning class thing. My first semester I had an 8:30Am calculus TA session every week for which I probably only slept the night before a couple times. 'Twas painful.

[Trevor]

Oh yeah- my film classes at UF all had their screenings at night, so there's another argument for late classes. You might be elbowed into taking them anyway if you're studying film.

[Scott]

Early classes? Don't you people drink during the week?

[Tim N.]

Man, where did you go? Heaven University?

I seriously want to know what broke-ass school makes you buy scantrons yourself.

[Tim N.]

Dear Patrick: Everyone hates my idea about early classes. This may be a sign that you shouldn't listen to that piece of advice.

Still, it never stopped me from partying. I usually sleep about zero hours a night, though.

[Moltisanti]

I doubt I went to the only school that made you buy scantrons and blue books. What a racket if it was. Serves me right for going to a state college.

Forget the late class/early class debate. Take Banks' advice and schedule yourself so you only have classes 2-3 days a week. Usually M-W-F is the easiest way to do this, but don't be too afraid of a Tuesday-Thursday routine. Yes, you're fucked on Tuesday and Thursday but you get a 4 day weekend every week. That's pie and ice cream right there.

[DARKMITE8]

Shower shoes. Are. A. Must.

Only have one of the basic utensils/dishes (forces you to clean them) and guard them with your life. Get a big round bowl or giant mug, you can eat most foods out of it (cereal, ramen, etc) and spillage will be kept at a minimum.

Yeah. Don't lend your movies out, unless you charge a rental fee. People will borrow your shit without asking, so keep stuff stashed.

Huge, new, fluffy bath towel (or 2) and maybe even a robe. It's amazing how good (and more at home) you feel when you're not trekking down a busy dorm hallway dripping wet with a tiny washcloth barely around your waste.

Baby's all grows up!

[Tim N.]

If you schedule yourself so that all of your classes are Tuesday and Thursday, life will be pretty bitchin'. Your Tuesdays and Thursdays will be a bitch, but then you have four-day weekends every weekend. Wednesday can be your homework day.

...don't be too afraid of a Tuesday-Thursday routine. Yes, you're fucked on Tuesday and Thursday but you get a 4 day weekend every week. That's pie and ice cream right there.

That's two, so that settles it. Do it this way. Then you're ballin'.

[Jared Melton]

I think I may have described this before, but I'll go over it again here.

The Ramen Bomb:
10-20 pkgs Shrimp Ramen
Big Ass Bowl
Water for Big Ass Bowl
Lots of Towels

Note - This prank will only work if your victim has a microwave within their dorm room.

Step 1 - Wait for victim to leave for classes/date/church/any activity that will take a couple of hours.

Step 2 - Enter victim's dorm dressed as a ninja.*

Step 3 - Remove "seasoning packets" from all Ramen packages. Dispense noodles about dorm if desired.

Step 4 - Fill Big Ass Bowl with water and empty all "seasoning packets" into water.

Step 5 - Place watery-season-packet-bowl into victim's microwave.

Step 6 - Set timer for 99:99 on HIGH.

Step 7 - Exit the dorm, securing towels to all aspects of room that may "leak" (ie...under doors, windows...etc).

Step 8 - Cackle maniacally.**

Voila, you have successfully executed the Ramen Bomb. Your victim's dorm and every single thing inside it will reek of shrimp ramen for days, if not weeks.

*Ninja attire not included.
**Maniacal cackling instructions sold separately.

[Luca S.]

Drunk chicks.

[WayDen]

Another thing you'll need to know, if you don't already, is how to make Hunch Punch (aka Jungle Juice). This drink will literally take years off the life of your liver, all while tasting like Kool-Aid that could run an internal combustion engine (probably).

Of course this depends on how many people are going to be drinking, but here's what I usually did.

- 1 big ass cooler
- 3 gallons of the cheapest fruit punch you can find
- 1 gallon of the cheapest lemonade you can find
- 1 gallon of the cheapest "orange drink" you can find
- 2 pounds (total) of apples, oranges, and basically any type of fruit will remain solid while soaking in liquid.
- 4 to 5 bottles of Everclear, or if you really hate your liver, get store brand grain alcohol (higher proof is what you want - here in Florida I've seen it as high as 190 proof, but it's usually around 150+ - which is still flammable!)

Slice up the fruit into hand held pieces (about 16 slices from one apple). Mix the punch, lemonade, and "orange drink" together. Throw in the fruit and let it sit for about an hour or two. Then mix in the Everclear, and let it sit for about 2 to 3 hours.

The fruit soaks up the juice & Everclear, and you can either take the fruit out of the cooler, or leave it in. Just make sure that everyone gets at least one piece with each drink. Because while the drink will get the job done, the fruit is is the nail in the coffin. While the drink is mostly for the girls who don't drink keg beer, it still good, and the fruit tastes like a really strong shot once you bite into it...

First time I had this stuff, I fell out of a moving vehicle. Good times!

[Jared Melton]

We call it "trash can punch"...and I use Hawaiian Punch and Boone's Farm.

Of course, everybody has their own recipe.

[Bryan J]

It's sleazy, but girls are their easiest as freshmen. They just go wild.

On my campus fraternity parties are usually better than house parties (but you have to know someone in the fraternity). The reason for this is that the guys are limited by a guest list, there are plenty of girls because they drink free, and they can afford to hire DJs.

I have to agree with afternoon classes, waking up fucked up from the night before and trying to pay attention in class is hell. Also, I'm doing the two days a week thing this quarter and it is amazing, 4 day weekends every week is unbeatable, especially with a break in the middle to spend on homework as was previously mentioned.

I also agree with not getting serious with girls early on, ESPECIALLY with girls who live on your floor in the dorm. It just isn't a pleasant situation to be in if things turn sour.

Some classes may require books that you don't even need, especially in the upper level courses. If there are no homeworks assigned directly out of the book, I usually put off buying the book as long as possible. Some professors put their lecture slides online and that's all you really need, but some professors are shit and you'll need the book to make sense of the homework.

Higher quality booze reduces potential hangovers, I'm looking at you Monarch and 3 star.

Engineering departments (maybe others, I have no idea) have a lot of recruiting events with free pizza, find them and mooch like your life depended on it.

That is all that has popped into my head at 3AM the night(morning) before my last final in undergrad. Enjoy college, make good friends and it will be fantastic.

[Richard Dickson]

Molti, don't feel too bad, we had to buy our blue books in high school.

I'll join in on recommending the Tu-Th class schedule. I did that my senior year and boy let me tell you, each weekend was like a vacation.

If you can afford it (or if what sounds like the suite you're in doesn't have one), get a refrigerator. Having a 7-11 nearby is nice. Having the stuff right there in your room is better.

That said, never leave anything in the fridge you don't mind disappearing.

When you do laundry, bring a book or some homework and park your ass there. You're not doing laundry, you're on guard duty. I had jeans, t-shirts, sweatshirts, you name it taken from the dryer. Hell, I saw people have their still-wet clothes tossed onto the floor because someone else wanted to use the machine.

If you're underage and you're going to drink, make sure you're doing it in a place you're going to stay at all evening, or at least somewhere where it's not a trek across the Yukon to get back to your room. Most colleges aren't so naive that they think none of their underage students drink, so as long as you stay confined to a room and don't cause a riot, you'll be fine -- campus security usually doesn't have the time or manpower to do room-to-room searches for freshman sneaking cans of Busch. If they find you staggering drunkely across the quad, however, all bets are off.

Chances are there will be at least one Grateful Dead cover band on campus. Do with that information what you will.

Most of all, have a good time. I've always said college for me was more about the experience of leaving the nest and living with other people than the book learning. Not to say you should blow off class, but keep your eyes and ears and mind open, and you'll learn all kinds of things you wouldn't learn from a text book.

[Patrick Ripoll]

Among the list of things I may not decorate my room with: metal tipped darts. There goes the Raiders theme I had all planned out.

[Scott]

Chances are there will be at least one Grateful Dead cover band on campus. Do with that information what you will.

In 2007. Totally.

[Timothy225]

Seconding Tim N. with taking earl classes - nothing beats kicking back by noon with the rest of the day open to you. Use that time to explore the surrounding stores, clubs, bars, attractions, brothels, off campus.

If you can swing it (and depending on your major), try to get all your required courses for you major done early in your college career - that way, by your senior year, all the stress and heat will be off you, and you can fill up your schedule with courses that peak your interest and aren't necessary to your degree. I was able to take Philosophy, Pseudoscience, extra Gym courses like Archery and Martial Arts, etc. when I was a Senior, and was rockin' a 5 day-weekend for half the year.

[Richard Dickson]

Timothy225 makes a good point -- my senior year, I had basically one class to take for my major (it was a senior seminar, so I had to take it senior year) and everything else was just fun, interesting, non-stressful classes.

And beware used CD stored near the campus. They will have you debating whether to eat that day or buy that used copy of that rare imported Elvis Costello CD.

[MissZooey]

I guess the question you should really be asking yourself is this - What do you want to do in college? Are you there for the social experience or to learn? I am seriously not being snarky here, because I think college is great for both of these things and both can teach you a lot about the world. But I think this is one of those situations where one can't have all of his cake and eat it, too. You do have to recognize that, on some level, you will have to choose between these things at times. People who wrote above about scheduling classes for partying/long weekends (something I did in the last semester of my senior year only) probably missed out on some good classes. But that's cool. It's a useful choice to make. They probably knew how to behave when interacting with people their own age by the time they got out.

I, on the other hand, I went to one of the biggest party schools in the country and I didn't get drunk for the first time until I was 21 1/2. Much to my intense regret, I had the same, boring, Ayn Rand reading, jackass boyfriend the entire four years (I didn't meet DaveB until three months after I graduated). I didn't go out on Thursday nights, and took classes every day of the week, whenever they were offered. Monday night? Sure! A two-hour honors seminar first thing in the morning? Hell, yeah! I graduated with 20 more credits than I needed, Phi Beta Kappa, with honors, near the top of my class.

When I got out, I was a total fucking social retard. It was worth it, though. I would do it the exact same way, all over again, with perhaps the exception of the jackass boyfriend (I'm going to concur with everyone who tells you to approach serious relationships with caution, but don't make that your lame speech to girls/boys who express interest). I spent 22 and 23 learning how to act like a normal human being and learning how to drink. I'm still not very good at the drinking bit, though I am capable of bar conversation now.

What kind of lame, broke-ass school makes someone buy their own scantrons? That's just sad.

If you're going to stay in the dorms, get your own room as fast as you can. I had one for my last three years and cannot tell you how nice that was. Dorms are breeding grounds for communicable disease and psychosis. Having a lock to which only you have the key is vital.

Yes, yes. Fear the used CD store. I have a very vivid memory of walking down the street, brand "new" copy of Out of Time (oh, yeah - listen to REM in college, my friend) in hand, thinking, "I have 250 dollars in my bank account. This cost me 8. There are 10 more weeks in the semester. So I can buy one of these every week..." Bloodsucking bastards.

[Jonathan Banks is my hero]

I agree with that morning class thing. My first semester I had an 8:30Am calculus TA session every week for which I probably only slept the night before a couple times. 'Twas painful.

And how. My second semester I had an 8:30 calc class across campus. Plus, it was my only class on Friday. And it was winter. In Michigan. Can you guess how many times I went to that class?

And beware used CD stored near the campus. They will have you debating whether to eat that day or buy that used copy of that rare imported Elvis Costello CD.

And how. I was a film music nerd way back then too (I've been a film music nerd longer than I've been a film nerd), and let me tell you, the used CD stores on campus (one in particular) were a fucking goldmine. On Fridays I'd get up and comb all of them in an afternoon. I even got with a guy in Los Angeles and set up auctions for him and made good money selling rare, out of print soundtracks I found around town. Good times.

Good times.

And how. It took me a while to get over the post-college depression (What? I have to work? WHY????), and this thread is bringing all the good memories back.

[Jcassady]

I even got with a guy in Los Angeles and set up auctions for him and made good money selling rare, out of print soundtracks I found around town. Good times.

When the hell were you doing that?

[Doug]

Yes, yes. Fear the used CD store. I have a very vivid memory of walking down the street, brand "new" copy of Out of Time (oh, yeah - listen to REM in college, my friend) in hand, thinking, "I have 250 dollars in my bank account. This cost me 8. There are 10 more weeks in the semester. So I can buy one of these every week..." Bloodsucking bastards.
CDs? REM? That is all soooo twentieth century!

[Richard Dickson]

I had an 8:30 English composition class that I barely remember attending, let alone anything I was supposed to have learned from it. I still have dreams where I'm in college and halfway through the semester realize I've never been to this class.

There is one benefit to early classes in college -- no one really gives a damn what you look like. I saw plenty of people roll in in sweatpants or pajama bottoms, t-shirts, and hats. I'd wake up, slap on some deodorant, gargle real quick, slip on some shoes and go.

[Diva]

I had an 8:30 English composition class that I barely remember attending, let alone anything I was supposed to have learned from it. I still have dreams where I'm in college and halfway through the semester realize I've never been to this class.

There is one benefit to early classes in college -- no one really gives a damn what you look like. I saw plenty of people roll in in sweatpants or pajama bottoms, t-shirts, and hats. I'd wake up, slap on some deodorant, gargle real quick, slip on some shoes and go.

My freshman year I had no choice in which classes I could take. All freshman had to take these 300 person lecture hall classes at 8:30 a.m. I often would wake up 15 minutes before the class ended, and as the mass of people were leaving the hall, I'd stroll in --pajamas, slippers, and all -- throw my homework onto the homework pile, and go back to bed.

And those who are saying take your major classes early? What!? Who knows what their major is that early? I changed my major 3 times before my Jr year. Definitely take random required courses early, but save the major classes until a) you really know what you want to major in, and b) you've got all the partying out of your system and will take those courses seriously.

Patrick, some of the advice in here is good. Some not so much. All I can say is college is a time for you to figure out who you are. Carve a niche for yourself, meet cool people, and most of all, just enjoy it.

[Joe LeFors]

Good luck Ripoll; college is a total blast. My main recommendation would be to major in what you enjoy studying, not something you think will help you find a job. It sounds like you're already on that path, though, so kudos. Core classes can be a boring pain in the ass, but major classes, for me at least, didn't even really seem like work.

And, yeah, listen to some REM. Of course, I went to school in Athens, GA (birthplace of the band), so I may be biased. But it's still good advice.

[Death Surge]

1) In the immortal words of Steve Guttenberg: "Sleep is for fags". Take those god awful early morning classes so your day ends by 1:00. Then your all set to nab a 2 hour power nap right at traditional siesta time, squeeze in a little actual homework there after, and still have plenty of time to head out to the bars to close them.

2) Unless you plan on later entering a prestigious Medical or Law school. never take an Honors class. The difference between regular and Honors Mythology is memorizing who Medusa was vs. analyzing how myths evolved via the interpretations of William Burroughs "The Golden Bough" (receiving zero credit for noting its displayed prominently in and a partial basis for "Apocalypse Now")

3) There are certain professors who hate tests. Pump any seniors you meet for the names of anyone who was willing to let them skip the final if you liked your current grade.

4) Psychology electives are way easier than you would think they are. Astronomy electives are way harder.

5) Rule for all papers with some leeway on subject matter: Write about something your professor knows next to nothing about, and that there is no general consensus of opinion regarding it. (Example- "Wiccans: Is dressing Goth required?")

6) Make friends with a geek working in the IT labs. You cover yourself if your computer crashes the night before a paper is due, and in today's tech heavy world, will ensure all of your bit-torrenting needs are fulfilled sans RIAA repercussions.

7) Never let anyone film you while you are drinking. Double that warning with regards to sex, unless it's Halloween and you're wearing a mask.

8) As fun as it sounds, do not drink 21 shots of alcohol on your 21st birthday. Kick the first person that suggests it in the balls as hard as possible.

9) Money is tight. Remember that Beer is actually a food group.

10) Hot Sorority chicks are completely bored by frat boys by their Junior year. Use that information appropriately.

[Jonathan Banks is my hero]

When the hell were you doing that?

It was in Niagara Falls. You didn't know it.

It was freshman and most of sophomore years. It sort of petered out after that.

[555]

party hard and party often. and go to class, if you can find the time. it's a good place to catch some zzzzzzzzzzz's.

[MissZooey]

7) Never let anyone film you while you are drinking. Double that warning with regards to sex, unless it's Halloween and you're wearing a mask.

Sound, sound advice.

Speaking of Halloween: despite my teetotaling ways, I think getting your drinkin' legs in college is a good way to go, but hear this - do not get wasted on Halloween. I'm serious. Every year at my school there was some poor, stupid fuck who got a little bit drunker than the other stupid fucks and something horrible would happen to him (always, always a him). When I was a sophomore, some kid dressed like the Karate Kid got dropped down the trash chute in a dorm. He ended up with a massive concussion after spending the night sleeping in the trash heap. So drink on Halloween, but keep your head about you. Same goes for St. Patrick's Day, New Year's, and any other holiday where people are going for broke.

[DaveB]

Good luck Ripoll; college is a total blast. My main recommendation would be to major in what you enjoy studying, not something you think will help you find a job. It sounds like you're already on that path, though, so kudos. Core classes can be a boring pain in the ass, but major classes, for me at least, didn't even really seem like work.

Excellent advice. Don't convince yourself you have to be too practical, either (unless, of course, you find out that you actually have a passion for accounting or business or something - then go nuts).

I went practical in my last couple years of school, augmenting my English major with a Journalism minor, thinking "hey, I can write, but this English degree isn't going to get me a job. I might as well look into that far more profitable field of Journalism!" Turns out journalism typically doesn't pay shit, the layout skills and writing tips I picked up in four semesters' worth of classes probably could have been gleaned from a single class or working on the school newspaper (which looks good on a resume and, if you're in Arts and Entertainment, you get free shit), and, when it comes to finding a job in almost any profession, people will hire you if you're smart, not if you know the ins and outs of PageMaker, Quark Xpress, and Photoshop circa 1995. I spent a few months in journalism and will probably never go back - I should have just taken more classes on Romantic poetry and Milton.

[Joe LeFors]

Keep your friends close, the label maker for your food closer.

Hahaha. I don't think there has ever been a college student, EVER, who has not been involved in at least one epic "YOU'RE EATING MY FOOD!!!!" shouting match.

(For the record, I was the eater in my argument. Years later, I'm still not sorry.)

[Richard Dickson]

It's just too bad that, thanks to modern technology, you're going to miss out on the joy of the old "Album Cover Filled with Baby Powder" gag.

[Jonathan Banks is my hero]

Tip: Make sure you lock your door when you're sleeping. A buddy of mine once woke up to a drunk guy mistaking his room for the bathroom, and his bed for a urinal.

[EdHocken]

Here's to hoping that the roomies are cool people and one doesn't have to go thru the pain of having to generate a cleaning schedule because otherwise shit would just get gross.

[Richard Dickson]

Patrick, you said you'll have three roommates -- is this four guys in one big room or a suite sort of thing where there's four bedrooms and a shared common area?

[Trevor]

I remember during my freshman year in '97 that EVERY GUY had either a Scarface, Godfather, or Goodfellas poster in their dorm room. If you insist on decorating your room with movie posters, at least try to stand out and find a Singapore Sling or Dead Ringers or something both interesting and less cliche. If you're an American male between the age of 18 and 30, we already know that you probably like Scarface, Goodfellas, and the Godfather. (This year, my guess is that you'll see this trend with The Departed)

Also, never enter into a food sharing pact with anyone. "Let's go food shopping and split the bill down the middle" is a recipe for chaos, hatred, and revenge.

[EdHocken]

I remember during my freshman year in '97 that EVERY GUY had either a Scarface, Godfather, or Goodfellas poster in their dorm room. If you insist on decorating your room with movie posters, at least try to stand out and find a Singapore Sling or Dead Ringers or something both interesting and less cliche. If you're an American male between the age of 18 and 30, we already know that you probably like Scarface, Goodfellas, and the Godfather. (This year, my guess is that you'll see this trend with The Departed)



Wouldn't the standard now a days also include Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Pulp Fiction and Resevoir Dogs?

I'd also suggest a Repo Man poster for your wall. Can't go wrong.

[Richard Dickson]

Also, never enter into a food sharing pact with anyone. "Let's go food shopping and split the bill down the middle" is a recipe for chaos, hatred, and revenge.
Aviod that same philosophy when dining out. Inevitably you'll end up sharing the cost of your hamburger and their three filet mignons.

[Trevor]

Maybe those, and The Big Lebowski. Or maybe we're all wrong, and this season it's Napoleon Dynamite, and so may god save them all.

[EdHocken]

Never be the collector of the group, if someone wants to spring for cable tv or some other extra. Chip in, but don't be the one who has to harrass others for cash.

[Anderson]

It's just too bad that, thanks to modern technology, you're going to miss out on the joy of the old "Album Cover Filled with Baby Powder" gag.

How old are you? You seem to have started the thread at somewhere around 35-38. Now, I've get you pegged at 55. Stay away from the thread, man. It's the wrong Grail and you're aging rapidly before me.

[EdHocken]

Maybe those, and The Big Lebowski. Or maybe we're all wrong, and this season it's Napoleon Dynamite, and so may god save them all.

I don't know, isn't Dynamite pretty much oh so 2005 or 2004 or whatever the year it came out? I mean it would seem really out dated by now.

However, an Anchorman poster would be classy.

[Anderson]

Never be the collector of the group, if someone wants to spring for cable tv or some other extra. Chip in, but don't be the one who has to harrass others for cash.

That's really true. I was the collector for all four years and it sucked.

Especially, if you make the mistake of asking one of the others to take the equipment back to the Cable company and they forget.

I've been called by an Insight cable collection bureau roughly three out of the four years in college.

[Richard Dickson]

How old are you? You seem to have started the thread at somewhere around 35-38. Now, I've get you pegged at 55. Stay away from the thread, man. It's the wrong Grail and you're aging rapidly before me.
I'm 38. I was in college back in 1986 through 1990, before CDs had completely obliterated vinyl. A lot of indie bands still put out albums (and if there's one thing you'll find on a college campus, it's fans of indie bands), and there were also plenty of 12" singles around.

[555]

Hahaha. I don't think there has ever been a college student, EVER, who has not been involved in at least one epic "YOU'RE EATING MY FOOD!!!!" shouting match.

(For the record, I was the eater in my argument. Years later, I'm still not sorry.)

my roommate and i skipped this one by filling our mini fridge only with cartons of cigs, beer and condiments.

[EdHocken]

my roommate and i skipped this one by filling our mini fridge only with cartons of cigs, beer and condiments.

Truly the breakfast of Champions.

Oh and in regards to textbooks. People have suggested Half.com and it can be a good source. But if you want to bypass the ebay-bullshit of trying to hash when and where you send payment.

I'd recommend the used book section over at Amazon. Just get the ISBN numbers of the textbooks you need and then run them thru over at Amazon. Plus you can sell the books on the same site if it turns out they're worth a couple of bucks.

The only thing you need to keep in mind is to do this a few weeks in advance because they are typically shipped media mail.

[Anderson]

my roommate and i skipped this one by filling our mini fridge only with cartons of cigs, beer and condiments.

I skipped out on that by having a massive fucking lock keeping my shit closed to the rest of the fucking dorm horde.

That and I had the only pair of bolt cutters on the floor. Why did I have bolt cutters? Actually, that's a good question. Why in the hell did I have bolt cutters?

[Anderson]

I'm 38. I was in college back in 1986 through 1990, before CDs had completely obliterated vinyl. A lot of indie bands still put out albums (and if there's one thing you'll find on a college campus, it's fans of indie bands), and there were also plenty of 12" singles around.

I tended to ignore the indie bands. We had a local drunk named Henry Earl who was the entertainment. Henry made it all the way to the Jimmy Kimmel show. If I still have it on my MySpace, I'll send you the link to this profile.

[Anderson]

http://www.myspace.com/henryearl

[stump]

Tip: Make sure you lock your door when you're sleeping. A buddy of mine once woke up to a drunk guy mistaking his room for the bathroom, and his bed for a urinal.
Yes, lock your door, because this does happen. I have done this. It sucks. I didn't pee on the bed, but I gained consciousness while arguing with my roommate that it was my bed and he had to get out, but it was really his...he never really spoke to me again.

[Joe LeFors]

Tip: Make sure you lock your door when you're sleeping.

This is extraordinarily good advice.

[Trevor]

When in doubt over whether to eat your roommate's food, follow this simple formula:

1/f (ah) + r

Where f is the amount (grams) of food you currently have in the fridge, a is how much of an asshole your target roommate is, h is how hungry you are (in Kelvin), and r is the number of other roommates you can blame food theft on. This formula blows up if you have zero grams of food, so always assume a minimum of 1 gram. If you get a result > 5, always go for it.

[Bryan J]

I guess the question you should really be asking yourself is this - What do you want to do in college? Are you there for the social experience or to learn? I am seriously not being snarky here, because I think college is great for both of these things and both can teach you a lot about the world. But I think this is one of those situations where one can't have all of his cake and eat it, too. You do have to recognize that, on some level, you will have to choose between these things at times. People who wrote above about scheduling classes for partying/long weekends (something I did in the last semester of my senior year only) probably missed out on some good classes. But that's cool. It's a useful choice to make. They probably knew how to behave when interacting with people their own age by the time they got out.


I can't agree that you can't have your cake and eat it too. It's all about time management. My major is one of most demanding on campus and so you may have to sacrifice the occasional party night for a major project, but for the most part if you can get your homework done during the day, your nights are open to self-medication.

[Bryan J]

Also, if you get a chance to study abroad, do it. My best year of college was my year abroad in Sweden. What's better is that I got my tuition waived and my Swedish school also gave me a scholarship for being American (we're in short supply over there, which is a good thing in my opinion). A program like that where they actually pay you to study abroad is a rarity, but either way the experience is hard to match. When else in your life can you fuck off to another country for a year because you want to? I got to visit a ton of different cities/countries and had exchange student friends from practically every country that I could stay with when travelling.

[DARKMITE8]

Tip: Make sure you lock your door when you're sleeping. A buddy of mine once woke up to a drunk guy mistaking his room for the bathroom, and his bed for a urinal.
Truly. But unfortunately my wife's shitty college roomate (she's known as "Dirty Gail" only) got up drunk in the middle of the night, pulled up her night shirt, and squatted in my wife's mini-fridge. She was also constantly asking my then-fiance if she would mind crashing in someone else's room so she could have sex with her boyfriend that visited every other weekend.

And whatever you do, don't be passive-aggressive, too prideful to say anything, or too territorial. If your roommate sucks:
1. kick the identified asshole out if there's a group consensus
2. or if your in a double, switch with someone else ASAP and move in with someone you get along with

You'll only have a better experience. My wife was miserable her 1st year because of the bitchy, inconsiderate (and filthy) slore she roomed with, merely because she was too stubborn ("I spent a lot of time and effort decorating this room!"). I still tease her every time she tells a horror story.

[Stormin]

Those cylindrical towers that blank CDs come in- flip that plastic lid upside down and you've got yourself a handy bowl to eat your EZ-Mac with.

Don't spray a girl in the eyes with Ax. Even when you think she's actually someone else knocking on your door.

Don't do the type of shit that will set off the fire sprinklers. You and everyone on your floor will lose all their electronic property, and you'll be popular then.

If you have the dirtiest dorm room in campus, savor it while it lasts. You and your roommates will have truly accomplished something.

A lot of RAs don't give a fuck, but a lot of them (who you may even become friends with) can be the secret police. I've had guys I thought were buddies search my room, or send RAs from other floors to confiscate stuff so they wouldn't feel guilty doing it or worry about becoming unpopular on their turf.

I brought back an old computer monitor after the Red Sox Riots of '04 that me and my roommate hollowed out, replaced the glass screen with wire mesh, put in a water bottle and wood shavings, and got two mice to live in it. We also got them a ball to roll around the room. And if the RAs had to talk to us from the door all the way to the back of the room it looked like a regular monitor. Top that shite!

[Timothy225]

Timothy225 makes a good point -- my senior year, I had basically one class to take for my major (it was a senior seminar, so I had to take it senior year) and everything else was just fun, interesting, non-stressful classes.

And beware used CD stored near the campus. They will have you debating whether to eat that day or buy that used copy of that rare imported Elvis Costello CD.

Thanks, Rich!

Patrick, usually (at least in my case), when you first arrive at college, or sometime soon after, when you declare a major you'll receive a syllabus that tells you what is required to get that magic Degree. Use that as your map for the next 4 years. If you're an early bird like me, go for the morning classes ASAP. Otherwise, take your classes in the afternoon, party your ass off at night (AFTER you do your homework, young man!), and use the morning to lose that hangover from the 2 six-packs you shotgunned on a dare, buy breakfast for that girl you met last night at the kegger over at the TKE mixer, or find something wearable to class from the pile of laundry that hisses at you as you walk by.

With respect to Diva (Hi, Deev!), in my case I wanted to get the classes I wasn't interested in (mathematics, Sociology, etc.) out of the way FIRST so I could devote the remaining time to the classes I was completely into (I was an Honors Art Major, with a minor in History, Western Civilization and English Literature). Doing that made college much more enjoyable to me (minus the Advertising Art course I had to take at night - that sucked).

And absolutely start budegting your funds. If you can get a part-time job once in college DO IT. In fact, if you haven't already, start saving money ASAP wherever and however you can. If you have stuff to sell, go on eBay.

[Jonathan Banks is my hero]

Tip #2: Careful with candles. For some reason (*cough* getting pussy *cough*) guys seem to get into the candle thing in college, so make sure you keep an eye out for lit candles, candles left too close to paper, etc. When I was living off-campus I was watching a movie in my room when the fire alarm went off in the house. Turns out one of my roommates had left a candle burning and his entire desk was on fire. After I stopped laughing from realizing that his desk was on fire, I put it out. I was the only one home, so we got lucky there.


Tip #3: If you have parties in your room, or if the whole floor is having a party and people are coming in and out, either lock your bedroom door or hide your stuff. No doubt it's tougher to do in dorms, but in my experience thefts happen way more often during parties than they do when you, say, leave your stuff in the library to take a leak or a phone call. One year we had a party and some goons started a fight downstairs. We realized later that they started the fight so one of the other goons could steal my roommate's laptop, the one that had a final semester project saved on it (incidentally, this was the same roommate whose candle started the fire - he also got mad at us for waking him up from naps at 4 in the afternoon because he required complete silence to sleep).

[Jonathan Banks is my hero]

And absolutely start budegting your funds. If you can get a part-time job once in college DO IT. In fact, if you haven't already, start saving money ASAP wherever and however you can. If you have stuff to sell, go on eBay.

This is great advice. My parents were big on me not having a job during the school year, and I drank that Kool-Aid with a funnel because it meant I didn't have to work. It also meant I overdrew several times (those damn CDs!) and occasionally brought a full cart to checkout at the grocery store and didn't have the money to pay. Just retarded on my part. I would absolutely recommend any job your time allows.

[Jcassady]

Tip #2: ...Turns out one of my roommates had left a candle burning and his entire desk was on fire. After I stopped laughing from realizing that his desk was on fire, I put it out. I was the only one home, so we got lucky there.


Tip #3: ... We realized later that they started the fight so one of the other goons could steal my roommate's laptop, the one that had a final semester project saved on it (incidentally, this was the same roommate whose candle started the fire - he also got mad at us for waking him up from naps at 4 in the afternoon because he required complete silence to sleep).

This roommate also would regularly turn on a gas stove, while not lighting the pilot, then get distracted, forgetting he turned the gas on and then leave the house for class. He almost incinerated me multiple times. Ah college.

[Jonathan Banks is my hero]

This roommate also would regularly turn on a gas stove, while not lighting the pilot, then get distracted, forgetting he turned the gas on and then leave the house for class. He almost incinerated me multiple times. Ah college.

Yeah but in fairness you were much more flammable back then.

[Timothy225]

This is great advice. My parents were big on me not having a job during the school year, and I drank that Kool-Aid with a funnel because it meant I didn't have to work. It also meant I overdrew several times (those damn CDs!) and occasionally brought a full cart to checkout at the grocery store and didn't have the money to pay. Just retarded on my part. I would absolutely recommend any job your time allows.

Thanks, Jon!

Start saving them bucks, Patrick, otherwise you might miss out on the most holiest of collegaite experiences... SPRING BREAK! You'll definitely need some scratch for plane tickets, girls, hotel rooms, girls, beach gear, girls, food, girls, hooch, girls, rent-a-cars, girls, bail, girls, souvenirs, girls, and girls you might meet in you bacchanals.

[EdHocken]

Thanks, Jon!

Start saving them bucks, Patrick, otherwise you might miss out on the most holiest of collegaite experiences... SPRING BREAK! You'll definitely need some scratch for plane tickets, girls, hotel rooms, girls, beach gear, girls, food, girls, hooch, girls, rent-a-cars, girls, bail, girls, souvenirs, girls, and girls you might meet in you bacchanals.

Not to mention cash for bail money and when you've got to take care of that post Spring Break VD.

[Chris Myers]

Never give away anything - you'll probably never get it back.

[Richard Dickson]

Never give away anything - you'll probably never get it back.
I let a friend borrow a book. He didn't tell me he was going on some Peace Corps-eque overseas program. To Thailand. Good-bye book.

[Mattioli]

(1) Signing up for credit cards on campus (using exclusively false personal information) is an excellent source of clean t-shirts;

(2) Stay out of the way of Take Back the Night girls... those ladies are ruthless and will not hesitate to persecute your XY chromosomal ass;

(3) Practice chugging. It will be your greatest asset.

[jvc]

I think Death Surge needs his own advice column on this site.

And I wish someone had told me 15 years ago what Judas Booth posted about establishing credit. Print that crap off and live by it.

[Mattioli]

I think Death Surge needs his own advice column on this site.

Holy hell, I just went back and read Death Surge's post. He could not possibly be more correct. In fact, I'm seriously considering asking my mom to crochet "Psychology electives are way easier than you would think they are. Astronomy electives are way harder" onto a throw pillow.

[DARKMITE8]

(2) Stay out of the way of Take Back the Night girls... those ladies are ruthless and will not hesitate to persecute your XY chromosomal ass;
During some drunken partying, I got caught in/collided with a "Down with Penis Power" (it was what they were chanting) rally/march while I was visiting my buddy at the very Liberal Arts Wesleyan U in Connecticut (which is what PCU is based on and partially filmed at).

I'm glad I escaped with my nuts attached. They all had the female gender symbol drawn around their eye.

http://eeo.gsfc.nasa.gov/women/images/female.gif

[Trevor]

"Psychology electives are way easier than you would think they are. Astronomy electives are way harder" onto a throw pillow.

It's true, but my Cosmology class was my all-time favorite elective. Astronomy electives will kick your ass, but you'll probably come out the other end of the wormhole a better person.

[Richard Dickson]

My college had an abbreviated winter term that offered all kinds of eclectic and off-beat classes. The idea was to encourage people to explore outside their major or to study topics related to their major in a different light. The theater department offered a class that consisted of a trip to Broadway to see three or four shows and study the history of the American musical. One English class went to England and followed the path of the pilgrims in The Canterbury Tales while reading the book. I took a class called The Art of Woody Allen that focused more on his non-cinematic works (his stand-up and his essay collections). Don't be afraid to look into a class that at first glance might have you scratching your head wondering what the heck they're thinking for offering it.

And -- although judging by your participation here, this probably won't be a problem -- participate. Don't just sit there taking notes. Question, offer opinion, challenge. The best classes I had were ones where the professor talked the least.

[Diva]

I once took a circus class as an elective. It was taught by the guy who trains the clowns at Barnum and Bailey Circus. We had three things we had to master -- juggling, tight rope, and trapeze. I am really horrible at juggling, but aced the latter two, mainly because of my previous gymnastics experience.

[DARKMITE8]

... mainly because of my previous gymnastics experience.
That's the reason why, suuuuuuure (he said in Innuendo Voice).

[Stormin]

One great thing about college is that it will teach you how to fucking sleep. When I first started college most noise would keep me awake, whereas nowadays I can sleep on hardwood floors with a backpack for a pillow and go right through multiple alarms or loud music outside without any problem. If you go through college and can't crash on any sort of surface or terrain then you haven't gotten a complete education, especially if you're majoring in poverty.

[Ahoatam]

I'm a financial advisor, and one of the areas I specialize in is college financial planning.

If you get a job, and you plan on collecting financial aid in any form, make sure your job is part of the work-study program. Otherwise your income will be assessed against your Expected Family Contribution for the following year at 50%. It may not seem like a lot at college student wages, but over the course of a year it can add up to having to pay thousands of dollars more. It's one of the easiest ways for students to screw themselves out of additional aid without even knowing it. In fact, your job at Blockbuster may have hit you pretty hard with regards to financial aid for next year.

Work-study good. Or get someone to pay you under the table. But I didn't say that.

[DaveB]

And -- although judging by your participation here, this probably won't be a problem -- participate. Don't just sit there taking notes. Question, offer opinion, challenge. The best classes I had were ones where the professor talked the least.

Absolutely. Especially in liberal arts classes.

In fact, I first met Chavez in a philosophy class where the two of us and one other guy were the only ones who ever participated. We had a blast, the rest of the room was dead bored.

[Tim N.]

Those cylindrical towers that blank CDs come in- flip that plastic lid upside down and you've got yourself a handy bowl to eat your EZ-Mac with.

Another factoid about the clear cd-case caps: They are the EXACT diameter of a smoke detector. So, you know, you can stick one up there and it covers your smoke detector. Just sayin'.

A lot of RAs don't give a fuck, but a lot of them (who you may even become friends with) can be the secret police. I've had guys I thought were buddies search my room, or send RAs from other floors to confiscate stuff so they wouldn't feel guilty doing it or worry about becoming unpopular on their turf.

That's really fucking shitty. I wouldn't do you like that, Ripoll.

[Seabass Inna Bun]

I took all the introductory astronomy my university had to offer when I went back to study some radio astronomy in the electrical engineering department. Astro 120 and 122 were trivial. Throw this (http://www.videocollection.com/product.html?product_id=2116) in your Netflix queue and you're 90% of the way there.

[Henry_Hill]

Put a breathalyzer on your phone - don't drink and dial.

[Patrick Ripoll]

Patrick, you said you'll have three roommates -- is this four guys in one big room or a suite sort of thing where there's four bedrooms and a shared common area?
It's a suite with 4 bedrooms and a shared area.

As for posters, I got my Hustle and Flow poster, my Hostel 2 poster (not so much a fan of the movie, but it's signed by Eli Roth) and I have this beauty (http://www.amazon.com/Mondo-Cane-11-Reproduction-Poster/dp/B000JVV3L0/ref=sr_1_1/103-2692530-6652602?ie=UTF8&s=home-garden&qid=1181257426&sr=8-1)on it's way to me as we speak.

And one of the good things about Columbia is that even gen eds are tailored to be relevant to your major.

[Seabass Inna Bun]

As for psychology electives, I earned a 6 by reading the textbook and showing up to get homework and take tests, and by volunteering for the experiments of grad students at ten bucks a pop. Astronomy was more interesting, if not as lucrative. Psychology was a necessary evil, as I had to take at least one arts elective per year.

[Seabass Inna Bun]

Only have one of the basic utensils/dishes (forces you to clean them) and guard them with your life. Get a big round bowl or giant mug, you can eat most foods out of it (cereal, ramen, etc) and spillage will be kept at a minimum.

This alone justifies my living at home through University.

[WayDen]

Not to mention cash for bail money and when you've got to take care of that post Spring Break VD.

Honestly, if you go on spring break somewhere in Florida (or especially out of the country), anticipate the need for bail money. It's one thing that no one really thinks is going to happen, and inevitably, always does.

7) Never let anyone film you while you are drinking. Double that warning with regards to sex, unless it's Halloween and you're wearing a mask.

It's impossible to think that there aren't going to be any drunken photos of you, especially with everyone owning a digital cameras, and the photos being posted by myspace or email these days. The best way to make sure you're not incriminated by photos is to be the photographer (even if it's not your camera). But do avoid video cameras like the plague - you'll always come off worse in video than still photos.

Especially since you're going into film, it wouldn't hurt to learn your way around operating a good SLR camera, which nowadays you can get for under a grand. Learning apertures, framing, compositions, & use of light (especially on your own!) can only be a good thing for you...

[Patrick Ripoll]

As for posters, I got my Hustle and Flow poster, my Hostel 2 poster (not so much a fan of the movie, but it's signed by Eli Roth) and I have this beauty (http://www.amazon.com/Mondo-Cane-11-Reproduction-Poster/dp/B000JVV3L0/ref=sr_1_1/103-2692530-6652602?ie=UTF8&s=home-garden&qid=1181257426&sr=8-1)on it's way to me as we speak.
Oh, and a kickass Night of the Living Dead poster.

...2 horror movies, one exploitation, one Hip-Hop underdog story, that's a pretty good balance, right? Not too nerdy?

[stump]

Maybe it's not too nerdy, but it is a little nerdy that you thought about it to that extent. Just sayin.

[Daniel Strange]

Right. Cause no one on here is nerdy.

My college advice is basically this: college is the last time in your life you are free to do nothing but drink and fornicate. Enjoy the lack of responsiblity, because it goes away once you graduate.

[EdHocken]

Oh, and a kickass Night of the Living Dead poster.

...2 horror movies, one exploitation, one Hip-Hop underdog story, that's a pretty good balance, right? Not too nerdy?

That's better than having anything Bob Marley or Reggae related. In fact stay the hell out of the entire genre while you're at school.

[Mattioli]

Abort!!! Abort!!!

Do not put up the autographed Hostel II poster. Sure, it's cool, but that will just piss you off all the more when it gets ripped/burned/soaked/shat upon. And trust me, one of those four things will inevitably happen.

That's what the colossal poster sales at the beginning of the semester are for.

[Rex Hudler]

Stop me if I've told this story before. My roommate freshman year dyed his hair a bunch of times our first semester. It got like straw. He hadn't been home, and was afraid his parents would disapprove, so the night they're picking him up for Thanksgiving break he decides to try to get it back to his natural color. His hair's so damaged, though, he calls the Miss Clairol hotline for advice, and they tell him to do it in two steps-- first, apply a stripping treatment that removes all dye but leaves your hair pumpkin orange, then apply the dye to get it back to his natural brown. He's planned it out so he has just enough time to get it done, and a girl from the floor is helping him out. He does the thing and his hair is Lydon orange, and then when he wasn't looking I got rid of the brown dye.

[EdHocken]

That story is hilarious but I can only wonder how your roomate got back at ya.

Ah dying one's hair, one of those things I didn't do at college. But I've got dark hair so it would've been REALLY difficult to do.

Still got away with not cutting my hair for two years and at the end I kind of had a Frampton comes alive thing going on.

[Rex Hudler]

Also: another time he said he was never going to have kids, so I drafted some unenforceable contract that he signed whereby he promised that if he ever has kids he has to name them after me. I just found the thing a couple of weeks ago. He signed it 17 years ago.

Seriously, have a good time, Patrick.

[Patrick Ripoll]

Abort!!! Abort!!!

Do not put up the autographed Hostel II poster. Sure, it's cool, but that will just piss you off all the more when it gets ripped/burned/soaked/shat upon. And trust me, one of those four things will inevitably happen.

That's what the colossal poster sales at the beginning of the semester are for.
Ah, good call there.

[Mad Man Mundt]

Chances are there will be at least one Grateful Dead cover band on campus. Do with that information what you will.




Might I suggest a firebomb?

[kingcujoI]

Another thing you'll need to know, if you don't already, is how to make Hunch Punch (aka Jungle Juice). This drink will literally take years off the life of your liver, all while tasting like Kool-Aid that could run an internal combustion engine (probably).
Good times!

This stuff is great. I lost my truck because of Jungle Juice once. I think I might have also killed or injured a migrant worker. But it was all in Boulder so it doesn't count.

[DARKMITE8]

Another factoid about the clear cd-case caps: They are the EXACT diameter of a smoke detector. So, you know, you can stick one up there and it covers your smoke detector. Just sayin'.
I always knew duct tape could help out in any situation.

[KABONG]

The whole page isn't loading, so I'm not sure what others have said, but please, please, please wear a condom.

[Patrick Ripoll]

I do the condom/pull-out combo. Also, the next morning I make sure to push the lovely lady down the stairs. Just in case.

[EdHocken]

I do the condom/pull-out combo. Also, the next morning I make sure to push the lovely lady down the stairs. Just in case.

You do realize that disposing the body is going to be a bitch and a half right?

[Patrick Ripoll]

It actually tastes quite good with Ramen.

[EdHocken]

And suddenly i've just walked into an episode of Dexter: The College years.

[Anderson]

I do the condom/pull-out combo. Also, the next morning I make sure to push the lovely lady down the stairs. Just in case.

You're only a freshman and you've already got your forced abortion plan down? I tip my hat to you, good sir.

[Patrick Ripoll]

So, the way my dorm room works, there is one common living area, with kitchen, bathroom, living room, and then we each have our own smaller rooms. The good thing is that we have them, the bad thing is that they don't have locks on them.

How worried should I be about getting my shit stolen and is there anything I can do to prevent it from happening?

[Greg Clark]

Get a footlocker and put anything valuable you have in there. Won't help much with your TV or the like, but that's part of living in a dorm room. With any luck your dorm mate will turn out to be an upstanding, nice guy.

[Anderson]

You can always take a look at how much they'll charge for installing your own lock on the door.

Head down to the hardware store, get a drill and go to work. That is unless they're dicks and charge you to replace the door frame or something.

Needless to say, my freshman year door room had to get repainted from things still unknown. But, that only cost 8 bucks which wasn't that bad.

[Bryan J]

It is very possible that there is a no lock policy on the doors. A lot of on-campus housing is pretty strict on altering rooms, I've seen policies banning the use of thumbtacks even though I doubt they enforce that.

[Owen]

I seriously want to know what broke-ass school makes you buy scantrons yourself.

I've been taking classes at Shelton State (it's a local CC) this summer, and I discovered that it's the kind of broke ass school you're wondering about.

And for Rippoll, I've got nothing that will help with the lock situation, but if you've got a friend you already know who's got an apartment, I would suggest stashing your DVDs at his place.

I would also suggest only living in a dorm for one year, and then finding a cheap one bedroom apartment nearby. The dorm experience is absolutely essential to a "successful" college experience (as in, everyone should do it), but later on it's a great help to be able to have somewhere to go in which you can be alone or with that hot drunken chick and not be bothered by anyone.

[Stew]

How worried should I be about getting my shit stolen and is there anything I can do to prevent it from happening?

In college, it's important to note that most of the time something gets stolen, it's by someone you know and think you can trust, not by some mysterious prowler who is going to break your padlock.

It's sort of in how you carry yourself. In my experience people tend to start out as very open and "what's mine is yours", only to get taken advantage of and try, in vain, to reestablish some boundaries. If you start out as Mr. Nice Guy who is okay with people walking into his bedroom and rifling through his stuff for something to "borrow", guess what you can expect by spring quarter? Don't lend more than one DVD at a time, that's a useful rule also.

[Timothy225]

Don't know if it's too late for this, but keep your good, important shit (collectables, DVDs, original CDs, etc.) with your folks, until you get your own place. Burn copies of your CDs, rent films via Netflix, etc. Smaller, important stuff that you absolutely need should go into a footlocker, like Greg suggested earlier. Get the best, tamper-proof lock you can.

If you buy anything you really like, consider if it'd be safe at your dorm and how essential it is to you. If you can live without it, do so. If not and you have to have it, buy it and ship it home to your folks for safekeeping.

Get in the habit of carrying your bank/credit cards, driver's license, ID seperate from your wallet and carry them in your front pockets (hard to pick your pocket looking right at the theif, and God forbid you get mugged, you're only out your cash).

Put small ID marks on your clothes (usually on the size tags, inside sleeves, pant legs, etc.) so if anyone steals them, you can prove they're yours by the mark. Had a friend do this at Monmouth - embarrased the shit out of his dorm mate in front of his fellow roomies, then made him walk home minus his pants. The theif had to move into an off campus apartment next day.

Food - you're fucked. Having that last beer, Twinkie, Baked Alaska, etc. saved for a special occasion will be long gone by the time you're ready for it. You might want to get a small fridge for your room and put a lock on it, but that might be overkill.

[Stormin]

The best thing about Emerson was that no matter what shit I had, literally every other person in the dorm had better than me. My laptop is laughable, my food supplies next to nothing, I ate meals using the upside down lids of CD 50-packs as bowls for Christ's sake!

http://delcompusales.com/images/products/thumb_CDR_HP52x50pack.jpg!

My best free acquirement when I was living in the dorms was my freshman year when I was doing homework on the comp with the door open and was so exhausted that I fell asleep sitting up, and when I jerked awake an hour or so later someone walking by had seen me and left a beach ball sitting on my laptop keyboard.

[LisaNY]

I don't know you that well yet, Patrick, so I don't know if you are good about washing dishes, cleaning the bathroom, etc. Four guys living together are bound to be slobs to an extent, and bound to only clean once in a while. It's good if everyone does some housework, but - don't be the guy who does absolutely none, because then they'll all want to kill you. And on the other side of the coin, don't be the chump who is the only ones who *does* clean up, because you'll wind up hating them. A group of friends and I moved off campus in my senior year, there was one guy who absolutely never ever washed his dishes. My one roommate and I who cleaned always wound up washing his fucking dishes. One time we decided we'd wash every dish except his coffee mug - and we just left it there. It eventually sprouted mold, and we wound up washing it anyway. If you've ever seen two really skinny college girls trying to murder a big fat guy, you'll see that although it seems minor, it can cause alot of resentment. Pitch in. Or, your other choice of working it out is that all four of you could ignore the housework all together and just be quadruple slobs.

[teledork]

Great advice here, Ripoli.

Something no one's mentioned is this: If you *know* you're gonna get hammered out of your mind, make small preparation. First, grab a liter bottle of Grape Pedialyte. Drink it. Alcohol will fuck with your electrolytes (it's what plants "want") and THAT'S where that jackhammer headache comes from the next morning. So if you load up on them before going on a bender you'll have less to fear from the hangover beast.

My daughter is going to college in a little over a year. The one and only piece of advice I'm going to try to get her to internalize is to NOT get more than one credit card. Honest to fucking God....more than one will make your school debts seem like a trip to McDonald's by the time you extricate yourself.

btw...do what you can to support live music while you're at school. Going to a bar is fine. Going to see a band is better. Find a group or two that you like and be a bit of a fan. It probably doesn't matter much in the long term, but you'll appreciate the experiences a bit more. Plus, it generates a little good karma.

[Patrick Ripoll]

All moved in, and I'm getting along fine with my roommates, one a film student, the other a jazz guitarist (our fourth roommate never arrived. We suspect he was apprehended by cannibals and consider him lost). I think I'm gonna like it here.

Thank you so much for all your help. You've all been incredibly great.

[Bryan J]

Spring Break! WHOOOOO!

[LisaNY]

We suspect he was apprehended by cannibals and consider him lost).
That should really go in the Meat thread.

Congratulations on a successful move-in!

[Ryan S~]

Okay, here's some advice from a guy who has gone to post-secondary as a young 'un and as the "old man"

1) Nothing is permanent. Use it as a mantra when the shit gets you down. One year out of University and all the shit that happened to you will have been forgotten...provided you successfully graduate.

2) Do nothing that will be permanent. No matter how much your roommate/girlfriend/wannabe lover/prof want you to, do not get a tattoo. Who you are now is a lot different then who you will be for the rest of your life. A tattoo of the credits for Citizen Kane may seem cool when you're surrounded by film geeks but in the real world stunned silence will be the response.

3) Dating is not permanent. I have met one person who met their significant other while in university and they both regret it (they love each other but they missed out on the hot monkey action of casual sex Thursdays). Date, dance with, have sex with, fuck randomly anyone who is willing. (Be sure the rules of engagement are understood ahead of time ie "We're just fucking, right?" There's no need to be a dick but be honest.) STDs are permanent, wrap your whopper!

4) Hangovers aren't permanent. Enjoy them. Starches and elctrolyte replacement drinks are your friends but it's okay to wallow in a good hangover once in a while. You need stories.

5) Road trips are a must. Concerts are the best excuse (my best was traveling from Saskatoon to Vancouver on a days notice to see the B 52s and Ziggy Marley) but a late night "Baby, I was wrong, forgive me" road trip is also good. Just don't be the guy who is doing the grovelling. The trip is much more fun if you're the supportive friends.

As a corollary, always have Tom Waits' Heart of Saturday Night ready to go. It's excellent singalong music for the long ride home. For the way down, AC/DC is a must plus you need "Hollywood Nights" by Bob Seger. Yes, it's a horrible song but it makes the car go around 90 mph.

[Chris Miller]

All moved in, and I'm getting along fine with my roommates, one a film student, the other a jazz guitarist (our fourth roommate never arrived. We suspect he was apprehended by cannibals and consider him lost). I think I'm gonna like it here.

Thank you so much for all your help. You've all been incredibly great.
His bed should now be the drunk bed, the getting ass bed, the keg bed, or a combination of all of the above.

[LisaNY]

4) Hangovers aren't permanent. Enjoy them. Starches and elctrolyte replacement drinks are your friends but it's okay to wallow in a good hangover once in a while. You need stories.
And don't forget in addition to the starches and electrolytes to get LOTS of greasy diner food when you wake up in the morning. Or at noon. Or two-ish. But seriously, I don't know what it is, but the best thing for a hangover is either an egg/bacon/cheese sandwich with hashbrowns, or a cheeseburger deluxe with tons of salty fries. Yum. I almost looked forward to hangovers, knowing that I'd be having food like that.

[Ryan S~]

And don't forget in addition to the starches and electrolytes to get LOTS of greasy diner food when you wake up in the morning. Or at noon. Or two-ish. But seriously, I don't know what it is, but the best thing for a hangover is either an egg/bacon/cheese sandwich with hashbrowns, or a cheeseburger deluxe with tons of salty fries. Yum. I almost looked forward to hangovers, knowing that I'd be having food like that.

Not sure if you can get it in the States yet but poutine (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poutine) is the best hangover food ever...

ETA: Has to be curds poutine, none of this mozza poutine.