Bringing Up Chewers

[Maus]

So last night, I give my 11 month old an important piece of life's wisdom:

"Son, always tell women that you love them, especially if you do."

What advice do you have for the baby chewers?

[Jason P. Thompson]

"Don't swallow anything bigger than your fist."

[Charlie Brigden]

"Don't post news without emailing Devin first."

[Chris Allen]

"You can lead a gift horse to water, just don't look him in the mouth."

[Werbal_Kint]

"Your daddy's a loser. Please do better than me."

[FrankCobretti]

"If you don't ask, the answer's always no."

[Rob Rocco]

"Better to ask forgiveness than permission."

[tcjsavannah]

"There's nothing in this life that you truly deserve, except the chance to live it."

[FrankCobretti]

Yes means yes and no means no, except for those times when no means yes and yes means no and no means yes I love chainsaws and leather masks and weird family dinners.

[sweaterbydarwin]

No more wire hangers.

[Werewolf Girl]

"If you don't like your ideas...stop having them."

[Alan "Nordling" Cerny]

"2 rules. One, monkeys are funny. Two, STAR WARS kicks ass, no matter what your mother says."

[Andrew O.]

"Cold ketchup is gross! It doesn't NEED to be refrigerated, please keep an extra bottle for me in the pantry!"

[Napoleon Rodriguez]

"Never get in a car with anyone who's been drinking. No, that doesn't include me. Don't be silly."

[Rath/Brendan]

"Look good. Kick ass. Get laid."

[Anderson]

Don't go chasing women. They're just like buses. Another one will be along in fifteen minutes.

[Andrew Joe]

"Kids............let me tell you about ORIGINAL ASPECT RATIOS..............."

[bigassposer]

It’s a magical place called Hong Kong it’s where good action movies come from. It’s so magical that even John Woo can make masterpieces there.

Oh, and don’t eat yellow snow or cheat on your taxes, that’s how they caught Capone-eating yellow snow.

[Nick Nunziata]

"Talking about working out is silly. Taking about jogging is silly. Making a big deal over going out to do exercise is silly. Do it. Don't talk about it."

[Brad Millette]

"Never retract, never explain, never apologize. Just get the thing done, and let 'em howl."

[Andrew Joe]

Remmber kids..........it's all in the reflexes.........

[ChainsawXxX]

"Have I paid my dues? Yes sir, the check's in the mail!"

"Child, in life, there's only one thing you need to know. One thing that will solve all of life's problems, and open the world up to you.

Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, Start. Now go tell Mommy to fetch me another Labatt's."

[ixnayray]

"Responsibility is a scary thing ... that's why it's always best avoided."

"If a woman tells you she loves you, tell her you love her to. Even if you don't. It just makes life easier."

"If you ever say something sexist, laugh afterwards and wink. Even if you mean it."