View Full Version : THE TRUTH ABOUT CHUDWEST '02 -- or, You'd Better Know What You're Getting Into....
Blofeld
07-11-2002, 09:13 PM
Transcript of my recent IM session with Ol' Will:
Blofeld: Thanks for the pictures. The place looks like I'll really enjoy it, and if I decide not to return to Colorado, I can hide on your property for years without you ever being any the wiser.
Will: That's true. Lots of hiding places here. I sometimes think that actress from Superman, Nichol***** whatever is living on my grounds.
Blofeld: Margot Kidder? You've got a woodpile?
Will: Yeah, her! Lots of them. I have about five cords of wood stacked around the place
Blofeld: Ah ... now the truth comes out. We're being invited only to cart the wood up the hill...
Will: Shit. I let the cat out of the bag
Blofeld: "Hey, gang. You want a beer? Two more logs from the depth of the property... Looking for food, idjuts? Cord and a half... FASTER, FUCK-NUTS!"
Blofeld: "But, Will ... it's hot. Can we have water?"
Will: NO water! Water costs money.
Will: Sweat. I have sweat right here
Will: Damn. Like I really need a lot of firewood in August, when it will be between the high 90's and over 100 degrees. Heh!
Blofeld: Yes, but you're getting ready for the winter...
Will: Winter is 70 degrees here
Will: Not like Denver at all
Blofeld: I know. But you need the wood for your imported, Italian pizza oven...
Blofeld: Will, your cover is blown, the secret is out. I'm posting the wood hauling conspiracy on the site.
Will: Its not my wood I need hauled, its my ashes
Blofeld: Your ashes ... need your barbecue pit cleaned, huh?
Will: Yep!
Just thought you should know. We're a work-party, folks. REBEL! REFUSE TO GO (like Django).
Kronos
07-11-2002, 10:35 PM
Ok, since you think you know I'll tell the part you don't...
Django is the firetender. And he carries this branding iron all the damned time...I don't know why.
Here's the rest of the transcript:
Blofeld: And Will, is that butthole Ludwig coming?
Will: No Blo, sadly my wonderful friend Mikey isn't going to make, although I'd happily pay for his ticket.
Blofeld: Screw 'em! Is that Timmy guy coming?
Will: Why yes Blo, Timmy is my best friend I would never consider such a party without having him here.
Blofeld: Damn it! Are there any fine women I can score on or guys I can roll for their money?
Will: No Blo, I think we should try kindness and love with one and all.
Blofeld: Homo!
Now the transmssion is complete! :D
Ludwig
07-12-2002, 01:08 AM
Will: No Blo, sadly my wonderful friend Mikey isn't going to make, although I'd happily pay for his ticket.
I can't ask this of you, but thank you for thinking enough about this event to mention it dude!
Blofeld
07-12-2002, 01:10 AM
You know who is going to be expected to keep the yard deer warm at night...
Ludwig
07-12-2002, 02:13 AM
Hands off my bitches foo'! They'll wait for tha Mack daddy to arrive yo!
voltes5
07-12-2002, 02:44 AM
Haha, Will, that was awesome! You know, when it comes to hauling wood, I'm tops! It's in my blood to do these things cause I'm ethnic.
Kronos
07-12-2002, 11:26 AM
Th truth about CHUDWEST '02...
It's gonna be epic and you too should be there.
Mike Arsenault (Ludwig):
Will: No Blo, sadly my wonderful friend Mikey isn't going to make, although I'd happily pay for his ticket.
I can't ask this of you, but thank you for thinking enough about this event to mention it dude!Wanna come down, Mikey? Email me.
Voltes & The Topkapi Schmo:
Haha, Will, that was awesome! You know, when it comes to hauling wood, I'm tops! It's in my blood to do these things cause I'm ethnic.Voltes, you can come and NOT haul wood. Let's see, who is going to be my bitch that weekend?
CTDeLude
07-12-2002, 11:53 PM
Will:
Voltes & The Topkapi Schmo:
Haha, Will, that was awesome! You know, when it comes to hauling wood, I'm tops! It's in my blood to do these things cause I'm ethnic.Voltes, you can come and NOT haul wood. Let's see, who is going to be my bitch that weekend?Sorry someone else already holds my reins!
(It was the Wine lover, in the garage loft, with timmy's tooth!)
Kronos
07-13-2002, 08:01 PM
The REAL truth about CHUDWEST '02 is:
It's meant in part to show what can be made possible in the future...re: CHUD.CON.
Enough interest in a simple BBQ which gathers the illuminati of CHUD will prove that interest in an even bigger event is surely possible.
Some don't realize, some don't want to realize.
But every institution began in humble surroundings...so too CHUD.CON.
CHUDWEST is its predecessor.
Search your feelings...you know it to be true.
Jim Pappas/Jabba
07-14-2002, 12:07 AM
Well, it is true Kronos, because we will BE a de-facto Chud.con.
I am bringing my appetite, as I am in the early stages of a diet in an effort to lose a few pounds. By Chudwest time I should be very hungry. . . .
Jabbadonut V.1:
Well, it is true Kronos, because we will BE a de-facto Chud.con.
I am bringing my appetite, as I am in the early stages of a diet in an effort to lose a few pounds. By Chudwest time I should be very hungry. . . .We shall feed your hunger Jabba.
Kronos
07-14-2002, 12:26 PM
Or is that "we shall feed on Jabba"...that's what the memo was about, wasn't it?
Whoops, I shouldn'ta said that...
CTDeLude
07-14-2002, 01:44 PM
No No. I think it was more along the lines of we would drink of Jabba's blood then stuff him for show at CHUDCon!
We love you Jabs!
Kronos
07-14-2002, 05:13 PM
Then put it on the webcam for display at GnomeDex?
If Grendel brings the twins, I know exactly where I am setting up the webcam!
Da grebdel has officially announced his apperance at CHUDWEST along with the beautiful HotPants.
Kronos shall be there.
Blofeld the mad bomber, shall be there.
CT will be there.
Nelson will be there.
HAM will be there.
The man himself, O'l Will will be gracing you with his presence.
Subtuoi(sp) will be there.
Smiling Jack will be there.
The infamous Rylander will be there.
Rhinestone Cowboy has confirmed (Email me dude and let me know if you are alive) will be there, I hope.
Other chewers whom I forget right now will be there.
Hopefully, yt will make it and I am setting a very special place for her. Its the Sony setting.
Jabba will be there.
Actors will be there.
Actresses or Starlettes, will be there.
Never seen before footage will be there. Incredible food will be there.
Drinks of every description, including one's you'll like but have never tried will be there.
Pictures of the Chewers taken with starlettes will be there.
Free t-shirts and hats will be there.
Dinner at Nick's favorite LA resturant will be there.
Your cost for all the above? Nada, zero, zilch, nothing, gratis, free.
Who says there is no such thing as a free lunch? Sat. August the 24th at 1:00 O'Clock, that myth will be abused and destroyed.
CHUDWEST '02, THE PLACE TO BE" "BE THERE OR BE SQUARE
You KNOW you owe it to yourself. You owe the stories about it, the legend, to your grandchildren.
Blofeld
08-12-2002, 06:16 PM
What, no Django?
Kronos
08-15-2002, 01:27 AM
Lacey?
billylove
08-15-2002, 12:32 PM
Damn, wish I had the dough to see Blofeld haul wood.
lol, Have fun guys and don't be shy in front of the camera.
P.S. No, nut picks. Please...
Brian (billylove) Collins:
Damn, wish I had the dough to see Blofeld haul wood.
lol, Have fun guys and don't be shy in front of the camera.
P.S. No, nut picks. Please...But I was thinking of taking pictures of my Macadamia and Pecan trees and they are both full of nuts. Are you sure you wouldn't want to see ol' Will's nuts on the boards?
CTDeLude
08-15-2002, 01:11 PM
God no I couldn't take the last one.
And above all I don't want to be present for any of those nut shots!
And you know what I'm talking about!
P.S.
Lacey heard Kronos would be there. We'll see what becomes of that.
Kronos
08-15-2002, 02:46 PM
Dammit...someone blabbed?
CTDeLude
08-15-2002, 07:00 PM
Kronos:
Dammit...someone blabbed?Well she was threatening not to come if I didn't name drop!
Now she'll see what's up.
Hope is still alive Kronos my man!
Still Alive!!!!
Subotai
08-16-2002, 12:51 PM
I must say - I'm quite excited. Break out the Sleeman's Honey Brown!
CTDeLude
08-16-2002, 02:53 PM
Subotai:
I must say - I'm quite excited. Break out the Sleeman's Honey Brown!You're from Canada.
You should!
Subotai
08-16-2002, 03:10 PM
You're right, I should.
Last night I was watching Jay Mohr on Kilborn, and 'Burbank' caught my ear - home of the Gay Rodeo?
Blofeld
08-16-2002, 03:21 PM
The cat is out of the bag...
CTDeLude
08-16-2002, 06:30 PM
Blofeld 28.06.42.12:
The cat is out of the bag...AHHHHHHHHH DAMNIT!
But a on semi serious note what is the bill now for the CHUDWest? Or is that to be worked out to perfection at Vida, which I never actually said I was going to (damnit again!)?
What is the line up? HOw is this puppy organized? When is the gay rodeo making its trip thru the playground where the children play?
Kronos
08-16-2002, 07:06 PM
Comped CHUDWEST caps are in limited supply...be early unless you want to order one later.
CTDeLude
08-16-2002, 08:56 PM
I'll show up at 12:30 or something...that way I can meet everyone one at a time. All at once may be an overpowering experience.
Jim Pappas/Jabba
08-16-2002, 11:29 PM
One week. Lordy, Lordy, lodry, lfyeagyag,
G'uh . .. l.
Lord have mercy. Me am sometimese=
Wondri
Goh.
Subotai:
You're right, I should.
Last night I was watching Jay Mohr on Kilborn, and 'Burbank' caught my ear - home of the Gay Rodeo?"Yippie ki yeah, bitch!"
Ah, Jay Mohr. Truly a gifted comedic talent. Did you know that Joy Mohr spends a lot of his days off entertaining orphans (not the gang) and homeless children? It's true. He seems like he would be a hell-of-a-nice guy.
CTDeLude
08-17-2002, 02:53 PM
Oh and looks like I will be getting there at the fashionably late time of 1:30.
Got to get my haircut so I look good for you guys.
CTDelude:
Oh and looks like I will be getting there at the fashionably late time of 1:30.
Got to get my haircut so I look good for you guys.That's great. It gives the other guys a chance to take the best meat and put back pieces they didn't like the taste of, but that's OK, you take your time.
1:30 is fine. Blofeld will probably already be in his cups, long before that, but hell you can still talk to him when he's drunk, right? Right?
CTDeLude
08-19-2002, 12:44 AM
Wait it does start at 1:00pm right?
Kronos
08-19-2002, 12:54 AM
Yeah...THE DAY BEFORE!
CTDeLude
08-19-2002, 12:48 PM
Which reminds me...did I ever sign up for Friday? I thought I did but I don't think I got any feed back about that!
Ah!
BEANS!
HAVE!
BEEN!
SPILLED!
:)
Blofeld
08-19-2002, 01:35 PM
Sure, you can talk to me when I'm drunk. I get all amorous and stuff...
Kronos
08-19-2002, 02:38 PM
And then the pictures start...
CTDeLude
08-19-2002, 03:55 PM
Dang cryptic answers!
Why you digging on the young'n!
Blofeld
08-19-2002, 07:31 PM
WAIT A MINUTE! Ol' Will just called me and told me that my performing the entire collection of Shakespeare plays WOULD NOT BE WELCOMED at CHUDWEST. Well, I'll tell you, I'm rethinking this deal. If I can't have a captive audience...
Kronos
08-19-2002, 07:47 PM
Blofeld 28.06.42.12:
WAIT A MINUTE! Ol' Will just called me and told me that my performing the entire collection of Shakespeare plays WOULD NOT BE WELCOMED at CHUDWEST. Well, I'll tell you, I'm rethinking this deal. If I can't have a captive audience...Only if you play Puck.
CTDeLude
08-19-2002, 08:38 PM
I'm up for Blo playing Romeo AND Juliet!
Kronos
08-19-2002, 08:46 PM
Uh...uhuhuhhuhhh...up...
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