Official Team Django Recruitment Drive...

[Django]

That's right kids, now you can be one of the few and proud members of the elitist group of the 21st Century.

All you gotta do is come here and post why you think you should become one of the thousands of registered Team Django members that run rampant across this fine planet.

And all you pre-screened members, do the same and make your membership official.

Service guarantees citizenship.

KNOWN TEAM MEMBERS

UPDATED: 7-8-01

ELITE BLACK OPS UNIT "BLACK FLIGHT"

- Under the leadership of DJANGO himself

- DJEvil
- grim_fist
- General Zod
- Tripping Billie41
- raoul duke
- DB Cooper
- flyers130

SPECIAL FORCES UNIT "TEXAS THUNDER"

- Under the leadership of HOT ANIMAL MACHINE

- Johnny Butane
- Lowshot
- General Logan
- Kronos
- Eddie 5
- Ludwig
- Axiom
- Poxy Von Sinister

THE SCREAMING BRUCE STOVE DUCKERS

Team Django's version of The Blue Blaze Irregulars. Next in line for membership status pending the death of any active member...

- Robbo77
- THX472
- Yando
- Andre Dellamorte

TEAM DJANGO'S GLAMOUR GALS

- girlcreeture
- Shelby
- Linnifer
- Diva

And Will is our Unknown Soldier...

[This message has been edited by Django (edited 07-11-2001).]

[DJEvil]

Cause I was first?

Cause we both start our names with "dj"

Cause I was co-captain of my high school's rifle team (with a high score of 280, but averaging at 250)? Gotta have a sniper...

Fuck, I dunno. I just want the jacket.

[grim_fist]

Here you go:

WHORE!

[Poxy Von Sinister]

Because if you let me on the team I'LL LET YOU LIVE.

------------------
Poxy Von Sinister
"That's the biggest hyperbole in the whole wide world!"

[LowShot]

Because I agree that Bring it On is a cinematic classic.

[Innocent X]

Because I too would go into Zone 7 to get Pamela Gidley's body.

[flyers130]

Because I didn't laugh when you called yourself a "CHUD Legend" and I didn't cry profanities when you said my brother was "wise."

------------------
Ob La Di, Ob La Da
http://film.fanhosts.com/

[Eddie5]

Well, modestly, because of this:

http://fp.geocities.com/morekirsten3/pics7/getoverit3.jpg

[This message has been edited by Eddie5 (edited 02-26-2001).]

[Johnny Butane]

I can't top the above reason, but I think I should be let in cause I get to have sex with this girl...

http://www.creature-corner.com/graphics/purtygirl.jpg

------------------
EAT THIS (http://www.creature-corner.com)

[Blofeld]

You know what? I don't believe you, Johnny. And, actually, I don't believe girlcreeture exists. She's too perfect a creation for fanboys like us to dream of ... a girl who will like to do the things we like to do? Watch the films we like to watch? Nope. There is no girlcreeture, Virginia.

[Hellblazer]

Because I think some people on these boards are way too open about their personal lives. Either that, or he just likes to brag about going out with a hottie. A =cool= hottie, no less.

You ass.

http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif

------------------
"Bugger this. I want a better world."--From the epitaph of Jennifer Sparks (1900-1999)

[This message has been edited by Hellblazer (edited 02-27-2001).]

[General Logan]

Sharing about our personal lives isn't the scariest part.

It's when we identify oursleves by our "handles" that is creepy as fuck. Like when "Grabass" and I would mention names out loud in discussion, such as "The bastard HAM ( http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif )"; "Where the fuck is Crowe?" and "Yeah, Zod is pretty fucked up."

------------------
www.generallogan.com (http://www.generallogan.com)

[Will]

Did you mention his royal sweetnes, Sir Will?

Hey django if I join do I get a signing bonus, like with the Yankees? I still can throw the heater, even at my advanced age. Maybe not 98 mph anymore but I can still strike out. Maybe that's supposed to be "strike them out?" I can't remember.

Oh well, make me Sargent, gimme the booze! Make me A Sargent and charge the booze," Quickly ID that one, django and I shall have to start referring to you as "The great django." Also give me the stars names and a little known fact about the tallest star in the movie.

------------------
http://www.homeownersrights.com Are you owed money?

[Johnny Butane]

Will's turned the tables on DJango. That's funny.

Sorry you don't believe, young Blo, I have a hard time believing it myself. But I'll tell you what. If we get married, you'll all be invited, how about that? And you can all take turns with her.

Heehee.



------------------
EAT THIS (http://www.creature-corner.com)

[Will]

Ewwwwwwwwwwwww! Guess whose gonna be sleeping on the couch after a certain lady reads that one?

Buttane: Repeat after me, "Yes, dear!" "It was my fault dear." "You were right and I was wrong, dear."

Repeat often and as needed about five million times. Then you will be ready.

You still going to be on the sofa after she reads the above.

[This message has been edited by Will (edited 02-28-2001).]

[Jason Pollock]

Problem there is that she's so fucking cool, when she DOES read it, she'll giggle.

Yeah-he'll be on the couch, all right. And she'll be sitting shotgun, watching Cat in the Brain until they decide to get tantric.

I didn't know I was a member of Team Django. Wasn't presumptuous enough to consider myself so lucky.

As for a reason why...well-why bother-

DEEDS NOT WORDS.

"And like a wise man said, no problems-only solutions..."

Bless ye' and thankee, Sean.

[LowShot]

HAM's right Will. Michelle is probably the coolest girl I've ever met.

Of course I was homeschooled and only know about 3 girls besides my mom and sisters.


... That was a joke. Seriously..

[Blofeld]

... he knows 4!

[DJEvil]

BA-DUM-BUMP-CRASH!

It's funnier when I don't have to edit a sound effect, so just never mind.

[This message has been edited by DJEvil (edited 03-01-2001).]

[girlcreeture]

Thankee for the coolness points gents, you aren't so bad ya'selves http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/wink.gif

And yeah I coulda put him on the couch after that remark Will, but HAM is right, I chuckled quite heartily. Donations for "turns" will be accepted at the reception http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/wink.gif

And though we didn't watch Cat in the Brain, we did have a nice mini Buffy fest on Saturday http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif

[Will]

Lowshots said, "Of course I was homeschooled and only know about 3 girls besides my mom and sisters."


Ah, Daniel?? How did you mean that? To "KNOW" a woman. in the biblical sense? Cause if you did, you should go on the honeymoon with Butane and Creeture. Wow!Things are really different on the East Coast, huh? To think people say we are weird out here in California!

Johnnie: I hate being a doomsayer, but I would like to be there after you and creeture have been married for about 10 years and hear you say the same thing. They change, man. They change.

BTW, don't let creeture eat that food that makes women start to hate sex, what's it called????? Oh yeah! Wedding Cake!

No offense creeture, maybe you are the exception. I hope so. Luckily, mine has retained most of her humor, but it only goes so far.



------------------
http://www.homeownersrights.com Are you owed money?

[girlcreeture]

Yeah we East Coasters know how to have a good time lemme tell ya http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/wink.gif

But Will dear you seriously need to rethink how you look at the wimmins after marriage.

And who says it's just females who get all poopie after a few years of being betrothed. The menfolk can get just as boring and cranky. And it'll take more than wedding cake to sap my Butane "drive" if you will http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/wink.gif

But let's not get all serious like and marriage minded, that's a big consideration there.

I've always made an effort to have fun first and foremost and not to let anything make me some evil demonic bitch from hell (and believe me there have plenty of opportunities for me to make the change). I'm not going to become the feminine version of Archie Bunker, what a nightmare.

[Johnny Butane]

Trust me, Will, that is a concern, which is why I plan on spending a lot of un-married time with her first. But I don't believe she'll turn super-bitch or frigid, because she's just too damn cool. And if the shit she's gone through hasn't made her uncool by now, nothing I could do would.

Trust me.

And HAM and Daniel have first dibs on her when you get to take turns. http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif

------------------
EAT THIS (http://www.creature-corner.com)

[Jason Pollock]

Thankee for the invite, Hondo-but meethinks I'll pass...

[Shelby]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Johnny Butane:
Trust me, Will, that is a concern, which is why I plan on spending a lot of un-married time with her first.

Thats why me and my BF have been together 7 year and no marriage.

That, and after those orgies, its easier to convince yourself that technically you're not cheating, because you're not married. http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/wink.gif

[This message has been edited by Shelby (edited 03-06-2001).]

[Johnny Butane]

HELL YEAH! I want to hook up with some orgy goodness!

I figured you wouldn't bite, HAM, since you're too good natured to take advantage of it, but I thought I'd throw it out there anyway.

Looks like it's all you, lowshot.

------------------
EAT THIS (http://www.creature-corner.com)

[LowShot]

Well, I would decline, because I care for you and Michelle so much, but since Will pointed out that I've never been known a woman in the bibilcal sense (certainly don't know my family like that, I live in Georgia, not Alabama {sorry DJ}), I guess I can't refuse.

[DJEvil]

You mean, you don't know your mom!? Damn, Low, you don't know women till you've had a slice a' that sweet Momma Pie...

...Who wants pie?

[generalzod]

Kudos and props. What's our next mission brother Django?

[Axiom]

Despite my total lack of knowledge of what actually goes on inside the team, and what is required of me if I join, I wonder if Mr.Django's offer from the Sliders thread(ah, memories :-) ) still stands?

------------------
Veni Vidi Castratavi Illegitimos
~I came, I saw, I castrated the bastards~

[This message has been edited by Axiom (edited 03-09-2001).]

[Johnny Butane]

If that offer had something to do with fisting, be assured that it does still stand.

So yeah, Django, what the fuck does your "team" do, anyway? I've been a member for a while now and I still haven't gotten any secret instructions or anything.

------------------
EAT THIS (http://www.creature-corner.com)

[Django]

The team is still in the formation stage.

Then we begin the training and planning stage.

Then we take back Hollywood.

More to come...

[girlcreeture]

So, uh, can I be a cheerleader?

------------------
You KNOW you want to touch it..... (http://www.creature-corner.com)

[General Logan]

"cheerleeder"

Heh.

[Jason Pollock]

Can you be a cheerleader...?

Well, creetchie...bring it on!

Heh. Heh-heh! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAAAAAA-hehhhh...whoo! heh...(clears throat)...

I'm retarded.

[girlcreeture]

But retarded in a good way!

------------------
You KNOW you want to touch it..... (http://www.creature-corner.com)

[Django]

Creech...

Baby, you're the (so far) only chick on Team Django. You're our Scarlett, our kitten with a whip.

Which makes Butane Duke and HAM Snake Eyes.

God damn I hate being Destro...

[Axiom]

Roll Call!

http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudcreech.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudbutane.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudham.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chuddjango.gif

I will be Beach Head someday, of that there shall be no doubt.

[girlcreeture]

Yeah!!!! Scarlett! I always had a dislike for Lady Jaye http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/wink.gif

That is fucking beautiful Axiom... &gt;bows&lt;

------------------
You KNOW you want to touch it..... (http://www.creature-corner.com)

[This message has been edited by girlcreeture (edited 03-10-2001).]

[Jason Pollock]

....

[Django]

And that kid is why you're the fastest recruit in the team's history.

Now if someone can find me the god damn Baroness all would be damn good times...

[Poxy Von Sinister]

Hey, can I play too?
http://home.sol.no/~frsat/orkocar.jpg
WHAT?!? That's not right! I -- I'll be in my room....

------------------
Poxy Von Sinister -- Now with the great taste of bacon!

[This message has been edited by Poxy Von Sinister (edited 03-10-2001).]

[Shelby]

Orko!

Ok um, I wanna be in, but I cant really think of a good reason why I belong.

Ok I got a reason. I was one of the few people here who really, really liked Q.

[This message has been edited by Shelby (edited 03-10-2001).]

[Jason Pollock]

....

[Shelby]

Thanks HAM, that was encouraging.

[Django]

No worries Shel. See HAM is our little Snake Eyes so as such he doesn't speak during official Team Django fuctions.

In fact he wears a really funky face mask that looks like a cross between the ones the Visitor's wore in "V" and Thomas Jane.

You can be TDj's Lady Jaye.

And I have just decided how we're gonna figure out our ranks.

We're gonna have a tournament on my Atari 2600!

[Shelby]

I fell so honored. http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif

[Axiom]

Roll Call!

http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudshelby.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudzod.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudwill.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudgrim.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudlow.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudeddie.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chudix.gif

Because DJEvil took Beach Head away from me, I give him the most compromising picture of Beach Head I could find.
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/chuddj.gif

[Shelby]

awesome! Im kinda sexy in a butch kinda way! You rock Axiom.

[This message has been edited by Shelby (edited 03-11-2001).]

[Jason Pollock]

....

[Poxy Von Sinister]

Hey! I'm a Stove Ducker! I ... I must stand on my head!

I am truly honored.

------------------
The Pangea Reunification Army. One world. Eventually.

[General Logan]

http://fp.geocities.com/generallogan/Misc/Shipwreck.jpg
Just making sure before it's too late.

You may commence with your "But a General is ARMY, and he's a sailor!" or your "In the NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVY!" jibes.

(Fucking Geocities!)

------------------
www.generallogan.com (http://www.generallogan.com)

[This message has been edited by General Logan (edited 03-11-2001).]

[Axiom]

I figured I'd save you the trouble of editing
http://fp.geocities.com/generallogan/Misc/Shipwreck.jpg

When using Geocities, put fp instead of the www, otherwise others won't see the image

"Argh! This stash of pornography will keep my sailors from turning to homosexuality during our long trips at sea....For about five minutes!"

[raoul duke]

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

The real question is what Navy is general logan in?

I think I'll join this Django worshipping cult, but for the record I'm only joining for the low protein gruel.

------------------
and a voice was screaming: Holy Jesus! What are these damn animals

[flyers130]

I feel a strange tingling for being a part of all this...and I don't think it's honor...

------------------
Ob La Di, Ob La Da
http://film.fanhosts.com/

[Django]

Well then, be gone with you!

[flyers130]

I figured it out! It was HAM's caressing touch...

Now I do feel honored...In a CHUDish sort of way...

------------------
Ob La Di, Ob La Da
http://film.fanhosts.com/

[DJEvil]

I don't mean to sound like the presumptuous little shit that I am, but I nominate myself to head up the International Muppet Extermination Force (IMEF).

...Or at least be named Head Sniper.

[Django]

Sure, but you're not TDj's top marksman.

I took out Silent Scope on two bucks and one continue...

[DJEvil]

Deal. I just need $200 funding for the operation in MGM Studios....

[Django]

Well as soon as I get a paycheck from IGN I'll send you the cash...

[Axiom]

http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/muppetor1.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/muppetor2.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/muppetor3.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/muppetor4.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/muppetor5.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/muppetor6.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/muppetor7.gif
http://fp.geocities.com/axiomr/muppetor8.gif
There can be only one!

[This message has been edited by Axiom (edited 03-12-2001).]

[trippingbillie41]

Because the first rule of Project Mayhem is that you don't ask questions about Project Mayhem.

[billylove]

hmmm

------------------
You want a little? Huh? You want any?
-ButtheadnPopeye.com (http://www.buttheadnpopeye.com)- and -for my stalkers (http://www.buttheadnpopeye.com/butthead)-

[Django]

For those of you who came in late...

[Linnifer]

Because I think Team Django is cool and I have a wonderful little mean streak and I hate SPAM and I'm female and... just... because.

[Robbo77]

Top 10 reasons why Robbo should be a member of Team Django...

10 I am a crude,rude, and hateful SOB
9 I too, liked Episode 1
8 I am a genuine lover of all things Eliza Dushku.
7 Ditto Kirsten Dunst.
6 I also, like Butane, get to have sex with that girl! http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/wink.gif
5 I believe Bring it on was a cinematic triumph of biblical proportions.
4 I don't believe I have ever read a Django post that I haven't enjoyed.
3 I can suck up really good. (See #4)
2 I know a guy who shoved play doh up his nose, drank gasoline, and ate his pet Turtle!
And the number 1 reason why Robbo should be a member of Team Django is...
1 My dog's farts smell so bad that I have to evacuate my house!



Read This Dammit! www.geocities.com/fumanpimpskeeto/CHUD.html (http://www.geocities.com/fumanpimpskeeto/CHUD.html)



[This message has been edited by Robbo77 (edited 07-08-2001).]

[THX472]

I just want to be the first kid on my block to say I'm part of Team Django.

[kronos]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">2 I know a guy who shoved play doh up his nose, drank gasoline, and ate his pet Turtle!
That's really been on your mind a lot lately, hasn't it Robbo.


------------------
-KRONOS AN ARMY OF ONE (http://www.sci-fighter.com)

[Robbo77]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by kronos:
2 I know a guy who shoved play doh up his nose, drank gasoline, and ate his pet Turtle!
That's really been on your mind a lot lately, hasn't it Robbo.


Yeah it has. Sorry guys and girls it just really bothers me. But think about it how many people can say they know someone who belongs in a Jim Rose Circus sideshow?



------------------
Read this, or something. www.geocities.com/fumanpimpskeeto/CHUD.html (http://www.geocities.com/fumanpimpskeeto/CHUD.html)

[Yando]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by THX472:
I just want to be the first kid on my block to say I'm part of Team Django.

Ditto. And because Team Django just sounds so cool to be in...

[flyers130]

Because who doesn't wanna be like Django???

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[Diva]

How can you have Glamour Girls without a Diva?

Django, we share a love of Bring It On, Days of Our Lives, and a hatred for some fucker named devilf! What more do you want?

------------------
Why must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots?
-----------------------
Religion is for people who are afraid to go to hell. Spirituality is for people who have been there.

[kronos]

Heh...

------------------
-KRONOS AN ARMY OF ONE (http://www.sci-fighter.com)

[Atma]

Because I don't even want to be on the team, and that's the only thing that makes a person cool enough to warrant being on it.

[Seahawk]

"Put me in coach, I'm ready to play...."

pleeeeeaaasssee?

------------------
"Hold onta' ya' butts!'

[assgoblin]

Hmmm...Nibb High Football Rules!



------------------
"We can't just call it Breakin' 2, it needs a name..."

[Eileen]

And yet again (twice in one week no less) I notice the old wrinkled CHUD people are leaving out the newbies!!!

Oh wait...it's some of the newbies that are causing the wrinkled CHUD people to create these teams!!

Nevermind

http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/biggrin.gif
~Eileen

[Jason Pollock]

...

[Django]

Well...the circle is now complete...

[Shelby]

Yay http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif

[Will]

As one of the more "wrinkled" old CHUD people, I will, have decided to take charge of the recruit training, for the female members of team django. I shall personally oversee your training in every minute detail. We have many, many secret missions coming up and I shall guide through the various arts of bewitching men and wrapping them around your little finger. Its a tough job, but somebody has got to do it.

A partial list of the training you will need to undergo is as follows.

1. Physical training a specialty of mine. http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif
("Will, I don't want to run today. Can I stay here in the barracks with you?")

2. The black arts of love as a weapon. (I have had those used on me to great sucess probably more than anyother CHEWER.)

3. How to torture a man with a couple bottles of champagne, a feather and open mind! http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/eek.gif

4. Secret night Ops. (The "undercover" Ops manual.

5. Cold weather survival. How two people can survive extreme cold weather and stay toasty warm all night!

I tell ya, now isn't Ol Will a nice guy for offering to conduct the training for all the Team Django female members? Whataguy, whataguy, whataguy!

Okay! Whose first? UH, I can make an exception and train two at a time!!!!!!

Train, heh!

------------------
Just out of curiosity, exactly how much body hair do you have to have before it is socially acceptable to throw feces?

http://www.homeownersrights.com Are you owed money?

[flyers130]

"Black Flight."

Oh yes...

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[Diva]

Heh. In just three days of officially becoming part of the Team, I have already been promoted to Field Commander. All you new recruits eat my dust, suckas! (See http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/Forum26/HTML/000320.html )

------------------
Why must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots?
-----------------------
Religion is for people who are afraid to go to hell. Spirituality is for people who have been there.

[Ludwig]

I WAS a Blue Blaze Irregular, but my name is strangely abscent from this list. Am I the first Team Django NON MEMBER?

------------------
"Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam."

[Diva]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">SPECIAL FORCES UNIT "TEXAS THUNDER"

- Under the leadership of HOT ANIMAL MACHINE

- Johnny Butane
- Lowshot
- General Logan
- Kronos
- Eddie 5
- Ludwig
- Axiom
- Poxy Von Sinister

I don't know what a Blue Blaze Irregular is, but you are still part of the Team. http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif

------------------
Why must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots?
-----------------------
Religion is for people who are afraid to go to hell. Spirituality is for people who have been there.

[Django]

They are not Blue Blaze Irregulars.

They are Screaming Bruce Stove Duckers

Know your roll...

[Ludwig]

Obviously my role doesn't invlove knowing how to read...thanks guys!

------------------
"Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam."

[Ludwig]

Or how to use these messagebaords...
------------------
"Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam."

[This message has been edited by Ludwig (edited 07-12-2001).]

[Chris Redfield]

I don't know about the 200 bucks in funding, but I have two pair of black pants, two black shirts and $300 in personal burial money.

[This message has been edited by Chris Redfield (edited 07-12-2001).]

[flyers130]

*looks at Redfield*

Too blonde.

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[D_B_Cooper]

Good news all around. Now when do we get to start trashing bozos?!

------------------
The sad result of a wasted life.

[DJ Dylan]

ok,django,im here,because you said to come here.

i think you should let me be a member of Team Django because of Will's last post in the Sexy Like Django! thread. I am the only one here who can bring comedy from stupidity,plus,i can work as a getaway driver,incase we ever need to get away.

------------------
Bring out the Gimp.

Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-laying motherfucker, motherfucker! Everytime my fingers touch brain I'm Superfly TNT, I'm the Guns of the Navarone!

"Muff diving without The Pussy Snorkel is like scuba diving without air tanks!"

[flyers130]

We'll need two getaway drivers.

Dylan (the one who will get caught and take the fall) and someone else to make sure everyone else doesn't get caught and doesn't take the fall.

So Dylan, if they ask who your leader is, you say..."Innocent X" http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/smile.gif

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[Chris Redfield]

Too blonde, Flyers?! Damn, I'll just wait it out.

By the way, did it ever bother anyone that the recruits for Project Mayhem had to have that 'personal burial money,' but they just ended up throwing Robert Paulson in the garden behind the house?

[kronos]

That's the definition of pork barrel spending.

Mmmmmm...pork...

------------------
-KRONOS AN ARMY OF ONE (http://www.sci-fighter.com)

[flyers130]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Chris Redfield:
Too blonde, Flyers?! Damn, I'll just wait it out.

By the way, did it ever bother anyone that the recruits for Project Mayhem had to have that 'personal burial money,' but they just ended up throwing Robert Paulson in the garden behind the house?

Well, in the book I think they buried everybody behind the house, so I just presumed 'personal burial money' was Tyler's way of getting everyone to just fund the crap they were pulling.

Maybe I'm wrong, but that's just my theory.

"His name was Robert Paulson."

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*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[DJ Dylan]

hey,thats fine. I'd take the fall any day for the good of Team Django. If you wish me to say that my leader is Innocent X,then i will.

------------------
It's not rectum,it's mercy!

Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-laying motherfucker, motherfucker! Everytime my fingers touch brain I'm Superfly TNT, I'm the Guns of the Navarone!

"Muff diving without The Pussy Snorkel is like scuba diving without air tanks!"

[Django]

Two more posts and we take over this forum...

[Diva]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by flyers130:
So Dylan, if they ask who your leader is, you say..."Innocent X"

Flyers, I like you more and more! http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/biggrin.gif



------------------
Why must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots?
-----------------------
Religion is for people who are afraid to go to hell. Spirituality is for people who have been there.

[Diva]

Haven't we already taken over this forum?



------------------
Why must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots?
-----------------------
Religion is for people who are afraid to go to hell. Spirituality is for people who have been there.

[DJ Dylan]

so am i the Team Django Getaway Driver or not?

------------------


Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-laying motherfucker, motherfucker! Everytime my fingers touch brain I'm Superfly TNT, I'm the Guns of the Navarone!

"Muff diving without The Pussy Snorkel is like scuba diving without air tanks!"

[flyers130]

Dylan, a test:

Who is your leader?

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[Poxy Von Sinister]

I must offer my neck and ask for mercy.

I just now saw that I am a member of Texas Thunder.

I respectfully take back anything I ever said about Django that could be construed as even slightly negative and await my punishment.

He who breaks the law goes back to the House of Pain.

[Zeus]

When will there be offical team Django hats and bumper stickers?

[kronos]

Didn't you read? NO PUBLICITY!

The beauty part of Team Django is knowing you're in. Telling the World is not necessary.

------------------
-KRONOS AN ARMY OF ONE (http://www.sci-fighter.com)

[Django]

Well there is that deal to start a chain of Django Themed resturants called House of Nero's.

And the Django's House of Nachos coming soon to Universal's Citywalk...

[Zeus]

Sounds pretty damn good to me

[D_B_Cooper]

What about the official Django House Of Pain? Any news on when that franchise is set to blow up across this great nation?

------------------
The sad result of a wasted life.

[DJ Dylan]

to anyone who is not a member,my leader is Innocent X. To fellow member,my leader is Django.

------------------


Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-laying motherfucker, motherfucker! Everytime my fingers touch brain I'm Superfly TNT, I'm the Guns of the Navarone!

"Muff diving without The Pussy Snorkel is like scuba diving without air tanks!"

[professor6]

He said "member"

[flyers130]

Yup, looks like "member" to me too, prof.

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*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[professor6]

I hasten to add that I question to whom or what he is referring to when the good DJDylan talks about his "fellow member."
I also feel obligated to state that upon clicking on the link to sir Dylans website on the culture and free form board, my computer crashed and the propane tank in my basement burst.

[flyers130]

So wait, are you sayiny Dylan's a woman?

http://www.chud.com/board/ubbhtml/eek.gif

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*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[This message has been edited by flyers130 (edited 08-03-2001).]

[DJ Dylan]

If I had been talking about what you were thinking I was i would have said "my quivering fellow member". No, I am all man baby!

------------------


Well I'm a mushroom-cloud-laying motherfucker, motherfucker! Everytime my fingers touch brain I'm Superfly TNT, I'm the Guns of the Navarone!

"Muff diving without The Pussy Snorkel is like scuba diving without air tanks!"

[Deadtony]

Well...

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Johnny Butane:
I can't top the above reason, but I think I should be let in cause I get to have sex with this girl...

http://www.creature-corner.com/graphics/purtygirl.jpg




that chick looks like she is affected with Mongoloidism

big round head like the Yongie-Bongie-Bo

plus she has the beginnings of a moustache

get it while you can, the only thing this chick has going for her is that she is young. when she gets some miles on her, she is going to be real horror (excuse the homophone). hopefully, you will break up with this chick, then run into her ugly ass years later and think "thank god I got it when the gittin' was good."
i've done this, and nothing is more satisfying



------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[Poxy Von Sinister]

Well you've really done it now....

You know, throwing yourself in front of a bus would have gotten the job done a lot less painfully.

Hunker down, Doc. The Reaper's a'comin'.

------------------
Sempre viaoloso. Sempre nefasto.

[Nick Nunziata]

Johnny, videotape the slaughter.

[doc_weasel]

If this creeturegirl (a more apt name I can't imagine) is you chudders' idea of a good looking chick you are even more pathetic mouse-potatoes than I thought.

As to your vengeance, I am quite unafraid.
Anyone who would like to chastise me in public, I will be at the Ice Palace in Tampa this Saturday, the 17th, as the band Doc Weasel performs there before and after the 'ning game. My name is Graham and I'm the lead singer's nephew (kind of, I'm his cousin's nephew really) so I'll be happy to meet and greet you there!

------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[LlamaRama]

Someone really needs to be there to hand out printouts of some of the things he's said about the WTC victims. With luck, the mob would lynch him for us and Mr.Butane could avoid the murder charges.

[D_B_Cooper]

God, what an asshole. Fuck off, weasel!

[Poxy Von Sinister]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by doc_weasel:
My name is Graham and I'm the lead singer's nephew

"I'm also his brother and father."

------------------
Sempre viaoloso. Sempre nefasto.

[Deadtony]

You come here and insult people's girlfriends, What a stupid fucking life.

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Deadtony:
You come here and insult people's girlfriends, What a stupid fucking life.

I calls 'em like I sees 'em and this pig creeturegurl has a face like a foot, I'm sorry.
She's what we call a mullethead. Eyes too far apart or something.
But just because her facial charact3ristics are unpleasantly arranged doesn't mean she isn't a nice person. Just a funny-looking one.
Again, I apologize for all my shortcomings, but I read the post where her bf Johnny Limpdick is bragging about how cool he was cuz he was fucking this beast, and sometimes someone just has to step up and say "the emperor has no clothes" or in this case "the mongoloid has a moustache".
I'm proud to be that someone.
Ciao baby.

------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[D_B_Cooper]

Ladies and gentleman, we've found him. The Tact-less Man! Now that you've crawled out from under your rock, why don't you go back to your life of seclusion with Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster, and leave us decent folk alone. Dick.

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by D_B_Cooper:
Ladies and gentleman, we've found him. The Tact-less Man!

heh, I love you DBCoop. you don't fault my perception she's ugly, just that I lack tact. Ok. Ms. Creeturegurl's countenance lacks some of the essential elements of pulchritude one might wish to see in a young lady. I guess that is better than saying the troll is as ugly as a mudfence.


------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[Poxy Von Sinister]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by doc_weasel:
I guess that is better than saying the troll is as ugly as a mudfence.

How is your mother, by the way?

------------------
Sempre viaoloso. Sempre nefasto.

[DJ Dylan]

Doc, you are the biggest moron i have ever seen. I think you have succeeded in pissing everyone off here. If i were you I would stop now, unless you want everyone here to kick the living shit outta you. Im sure everyone wants to. Fuck off!

[Eyeball Kid]

Hey doc_weasel:
http://www.theaskguys.com/%7Epics/jeffythekitten.jpg

-and-

http://www.theaskguys.com/%7Epics/PISTOL.jpg

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by DJ Dylan:
Doc, you are the biggest moron i have ever seen. I think you have succeeded in pissing everyone off here. If i were you I would stop now, unless you want everyone here to kick the living shit outta you. Im sure everyone wants to.

note the signature, DJ_Diddlydangdoofus


------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[grabass]

Now he's purposely picking fights with chewers?

What, no one visiting that "hot" website of yours, and now you're just bored and trying to piss on people?

'Cause, ya know, any time you wanna discuss movies and show us some of that deep intellect of yours, I'm sure we'd all be thrilled to glean a li'l insight into that huge brain of yours.

You don't piss me off, kid. You make me chuckle.

No, not WITH you...

You're out-classed here, genius.

And thanks for keeping the Django Recruitment thread alive, as I've been seriously considering signing up...

[Rex Hudler]

If doc was contributing anything other than self-promotion and starting fights I might see this differently, but seeing as how he isn't, why hasn't he been banned? What more does someone have to do? This isn't garden variety trollage.

[The Duke]

Why is this thread still open? Please lock it, delete it, and have Django start a new recruitment drive. Continuing to reply to this guy is pointless.

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Russell Lucas:
If doc was contributing anything other than self-promotion and starting fights I might see this differently, but seeing as how he isn't, why hasn't he been banned? What more does someone have to do? This isn't garden variety trollage.

its the self-promotion forum you fucktard. that's what my post is all about. and what's with all the whining, you fucking baby. you and you no-life-having cohorts (1000 posts = no life) spammed my thread with your bull and you didn't see me whining about it. I read your post here and it translates "wah wah wah I'm Russell Pukeus and I'm a big fat baby and I'm too stupid to top doc_weasel with words or deeds so please ban him and delete his posts wah wah my diapers wet and my pussy hurts."
Get your ass in a plane and come to Tampa, Saturday night and I'll kick your fat ass all around the Ice Palace, you cry baby. God, what a bunch of babies on this board. Talk about can dish it but can't take it. And that goes for you too, DJ_Dypshit



------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[LlamaRama]

This thread has been twisted and warped beyond its original intent, grown to incredible size, and serves no purpose than to support a festering, disgusting evil.

I'm sure Django is very proud of what he has created.

[imported_Adam Warren]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by doc_weasel:
its the self-promotion forum you fucktard. that's what my post is all about. and what's with all the whining, you fucking baby. you and you no-life-having cohorts (1000 posts = no life) spammed my thread with your bull and you didn't see me whining about it. I read your post here and it translates "wah wah wah I'm Russell Pukeus and I'm a big fat baby and I'm too stupid to top doc_weasel with words or deeds so please ban him and delete his posts wah wah my diapers wet and my pussy hurts."
Get your ass in a plane and come to Tampa, Saturday night and I'll kick your fat ass all around the Ice Palace, you cry baby. God, what a bunch of babies on this board. Talk about can dish it but can't take it. And that goes for you too, DJ_Dypshit

Weasel, you run an internet website devoted to the untalented re-hashing of onoinesque humour. The only person here with no life, is the one who coined the profoundly insulting personal jab: "Russell Pukeus." I'm no English student,--don't bother taking jabs at my writing, I could care less-- but I sense a few shortcomings in your skills-- mainly the whole bit about you not being funny.

I suspect you were one of those annoying children in school who hurled insults at his/her more volatile classmates, and ran to the teacher when those classmates tried to kick your ass. Funny in elementary school, sad when you're old enough to get into night clubs. You're a one trick pony, doc. You hurl insults and hide behind the anonymity of the internet-- a stand in for the authority figure who once protected you from the violent urges of your peers.

Feel free to keep "calculating everything you do to piss me off," doc. It's a good goal to have in life.




[This message has been edited by Adam Warren (edited 11-14-2001).]

[Will]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by doc_weasel:

that chick looks like she is affected with Mongoloidism

big round head like the Yongie-Bongie-Bo

plus she has the beginnings of a moustache

get it while you can, the only thing this chick has going for her is that she is young. when she gets some miles on her, she is going to be real horror (excuse the homophone). hopefully, you will break up with this chick, then run into her ugly ass years later and think "thank god I got it when the gittin' was good."
i've done this, and nothing is more satisfying



Hey doc, why didn't you just say something horrible about someone's mother. Have you been doing a lot of crack lately?

You are fucking with teh girl of most of the guys on chuds, dream. Crack is so nasty!

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Adam Warren:
Feel free to keep "calculating everything you do to piss me off," doc. It's a good goal to have in life.


at least I have a dream!



------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[Django]

I have no idea what to say about any of this, so please pick your favorite from the following:

Choice A: I despise foreigners with red hair, green eyes, drinking human blood. I won't sell dolls to them.

Choice B: Those bastards made me not being promoted. They made me to remain small potato. Go to hell.

Choice C: Grandma, refrain from so much foul language.

I'm so old, I can speak whatever shit I like.

Choice D: Dammit! Beaten by a woman! And a bean-curd seller at that!

Choose wisely...

[A-Pathetic]

I believe what Doc is trying to tell us is that he's glad we aren't trolls like he is. If we were trolls, we could probably bombard the Tampa Bay Lightning office with emails angry about a band that plays at the hockey games. You know, emails from hundreds of different random email addresses? Then, the Lightning might let the band know they really aren't much needed any more. Then, Doc's mothers sisters little friends fuckfriends uncle might get a little cheesed at Doc and kick the living shit out of him.
So thank goodness we aren't like that.

[Rex Hudler]

You're right, A-P. But in case people have other things they want to tell the Lightning about, they could use the below "contact us" link.

http://www.tampabaylightning.com/contactus.cfm?category=3&pageid=230

Personally, I think they should give Matthew Barnaby more ice time. And get rid of the music group that plays before and after home games.

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by A-Pathetic:
I believe what Doc is trying to tell us is that he's glad we aren't trolls like he is. If we were trolls, we could probably bombard the Tampa Bay Lightning office with emails angry about a band that plays at the hockey games. You know, emails from hundreds of different random email addresses? Then, the Lightning might let the band know they really aren't much needed any more. Then, Doc's mothers sisters little friends fuckfriends uncle might get a little cheesed at Doc and kick the living shit out of him.
So thank goodness we aren't like that.
Shoot your best shot chudders
If I was at all worried about any of you chicken shits I wouldn't have told you about it.
There's been a lot of talk about 'hiding behind the internet'. Well, I'll be there in the flesh, to meet and greet anyone who wants to show up. My RL name is Graham, all the guys in the band know me and will be glad to point me out. Loudmouths like DeadTony who are supposedly from Florida should come and tell me just what an asshole they think I am.
The idea your puny emails could derail the band is ludicrous. I won't even go into the reasons why. But I wish you well. Knock yourselves out.




------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[Deadtony]

I don't live in flordia.

I am visting there and I have no desrie to meet you or kick your ass or have you kick my ass or do anything with each others asses.

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Deadtony:
I don't live in flordia.

I am visting there and I have no desrie to meet you or kick your ass or have you kick my ass or do anything with each others asses.

I never said anything about anyone kicking anyone's ass, you violent femme.
Altho, if you do show up, there's a good chance you will be witness to another ass-kicking taken by our lowly Tampa Bay Lightning (when are they gonna move? The keep threatening to)


------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[flyers130]

I'll be there, doc.

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by flyers130:
I'll be there, doc.



You'll have fun. I expect them to open with "And She Was" then prolly "Real World" and then "If You Could Only See" or maybe just "Chain Gang". "Push" and "Slide" and "Rain King" and "Mrs. Robinson" will follow shortly thereafter.
It's an early game, they start around 3pm

------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[This message has been edited by doc_weasel (edited 11-17-2001).]

[flyers130]

Well, I don't plan on listening to the shitty music.

Viva la CHUD!

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by flyers130:
Well, I don't plan on listening to the shitty music.

Viva la CHUD! I am Gay!



Oh, it was shitty alright. Shitty like a _fox_!



------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by flyers130:
I'll be there, doc.

-------------------

*fist pump*



Well, where were you flyer? You didn't show. Maybe you were pumping you fist or being pumped by a fist or I don't know what.

------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[flyers130]

Or maybe I was just talking random shit because I don't give a flying fuck about you and your friends, you sick fuck.

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by flyers130:
Or maybe I was just talking random shit


Well, at least you are consistent.

------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.

[flyers130]

You know, you'd be better off posting your sick fucking beastiality then trying to be a smartass.

------------------
*fist pump* (http://film.fanhosts.com/)

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by flyers130:
You know, you'd be better off posting your sick fucking beastiality then trying to be a smartass.



Sorry, have neither the time nor the inclination. But whatever turns you on, in the privacy of your own home, far be it from me to condemn your sexual peccadillos.

[This message has been edited by doc_weasel (edited 11-19-2001).]

[DJ Dylan]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by eyeball kid:
Hey doc_weasel:



http://www.theaskguys.com/%7Epics/PISTOL.jpg


Ok,that is completely innapropriate. Please see my thread titled "and now for the bad news" for my reason why. That is exactly what my friend did.



------------------
"NEVER RUIN A DIBBS SHIRT"-Eyedea

"LOVE ME NOT"-mf Shalem

"Yes/No/Maybe"-Sage Francis

"God Hates me! Turntable Hardcore"-Mr Dibbs

Slug is Dumb, Dylan is smart"-Atmosphere(a.k.a Slug)

Heres an Explanation of the Preceeding quotes. I was at this really tight concert.They were all things the performers wrote for me.

[doc_weasel]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by DJ Dylan:

Ok,that is completely innapropriate. Please see my thread titled "and now for the bad news" for my reason why. That is exactly what my friend did.
When will people learn? If only those instructions had not been carelessly posted on the internet, Dj's friend might be alive today. Very unthinking and callous of you eyeball kid. I apologize for his insensitivity, DJ. That was just wrong and I am just appalled he would post such a thing.
Even _I_ would never go that far! So I feel pretty superior to eyeball.


------------------
Everything I do is calculated to piss you off, dumbass.