If it was you, how would you have handled it?

[donde]

I figured that I would start a thread for people to drop in and give their ideas on how would chewers handle a situation in movie if they were in a particular position? It can be any kind of movie and scene (porn excluded), just give both and how you would have dealt with the situation. I'll leave it up to you to decide if you would already know how things are going to go down or not. I'll start:

Movie - House on Haunted Hill (1999)
Scene - All the major characters are standing in the lobby of the haunted house and being offered $1 million to spend the night in the spot.
Knowing how it all turns out - "Yeah. Uh, you can keep your money, I've got to go."
Not knowing how it all turns out - "Oh, a night in a haunted house you say? I've got to go. There's a Giants game on in a little while and they're on a roll. Good luck."

[Van Read]

I don't think I would have jabbed a huge iron rod into Voorhees' corpse on a stormy night. Maybe pissed on him a little, but definitely no iron rod-ering.

[Kovacs]

I would have taken the blue pill in the Matrix. I'm no one's savior and let me eat steak instead of waking up with tubes in my newly created orifices. Also, a handful of (beautiful, sweaty and horny) people against a billion machines? No.

[Mattioli]

I would have almost certainly punched the hell out of (or, at the very least attempted to) Alec Baldwin in Glengarry Glen Ross. Great scene? Do I even need to answer that? Would I put up with that in a similar situation? Hell to the no.

[Timothy225]

Movie - Pulp Fiction
Scene - Marsallus Wallace is speaking to Butch about throwing his upcoming fight.
Knowing how it all turns out - My ass would be hitting the canvas EXACTLY as instructed.
Not knowing how it all turns out - Fucking pride, per Mr. Wallace's instructions. You don't argue with Ving Rhames, no sir.

[MissZooey]

Why do they all go into the basement/attic/dark room? I would never, ever go in the basement/attic/dark room. Oh, and as soon as I find my friend's tongue in a little flannel bag, I'm calling a forest ranger and getting the hell out of there.

[Jacob Singer]

To continue MissZooey's theme, if I'm ever at the point where I've shot the killer/slasher/monster that's been terrorizing my family and friends, I'm going to make goddam sure he/she/it is fucking dead before I limp away in assumed victory.

I mean, stabbing, head-stomping, rock-smasing, fully unloading my clip, showing it a picture of Ann Coulter, whatever it takes, to Make. Sure. It's. Dead.

[pagoda]

Movie - Pulp Fiction
Scene - Marsallus Wallace is speaking to Butch about throwing his upcoming fight.
Knowing how it all turns out - My ass would be hitting the canvas EXACTLY as instructed.


Wait, even knowing that everything would work out - you'd make a ton of money, win the fight, get a free gay-cop-pornshow, and get off scot-free (and a nifty chopper) you'd still throw the fight?

[Timothy225]

To take what MissZooey posted a step further, why the hell would anyone wnat to work as a counselor for a camp as notorious as Crystal Lake? Especially if they never catch the killer?

I'd rather spend another lousy summer working at Great Adventure, thanks. Lot of weird stuff there, yes, but you knew you were going home in one piece.

[Trejo]

I mean, stabbing, head-stomping, rock-smasing, fully unloading my clip, showing it a picture of Ann Coulter, whatever it takes, to Make. Sure. It's. Dead.

Hey now, that's just uncalled for killer/slasher/monster brutality.

[pagoda]

Running Scared
The Entire Movie
I would have just blown my cover. Getting the gun back isn't really necessary, or worth everything he goes through if he's a cop. That always bothered me.

[MissZooey]

To take what MissZooey posted a step further, why the hell would anyone wnat to work as a counselor for a camp as notorious as Crystal Lake? Especially if they never catch the killer?

Forgive this, as it isn't film related, but I've been watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer (made it partway through the 3rd season. I've seen a lot of it before and know how it ends, but I've also forgotten a lot. So hush.) and I'd really like to know how they're able to continue finding teachers for that high school. Can you imagine what those job interviews are like? So, yeah, I wouldn't be the school nurse at Sunnydale High.

[Rob]

I'd rather spend another lousy summer working at Great Adventure, thanks. Lot of weird stuff there, yes, but you knew you were going home in one piece.

And at the worst, maybe smelling like shit.

[Doug]

Why do they all go into the basement/attic/dark room?
Actually, in Night of The Living Dead, they should have all just locked themselves into the basement. Cooper was right, man. Cooper was right.

[MissZooey]

Point taken. But if anyone's standing in the corner with his face to the wall, you've made a huge mistake.

[Doug]

They would definitely have to deal with Cooper's infected daughter. When she gets up all zombified and Ben has to shoot her, well, after that things could be... awkward for the next few hours.

[Moltisanti]

Running Scared
The Entire Movie
I would have just blown my cover. Getting the gun back isn't really necessary, or worth everything he goes through if he's a cop. That always bothered me.

Personally I would have just bought the bar and kept my ass in Key West. So what if Julio Gonzalez becomes the underworld king of Chicago? No skin off my teeth.

[Trejo]

Terminator: (assuming the Michael Biehn role)

Not knowing the outcome - I would have just let Sarah take her uzi clip to the chest, knowing I'd have a few good years of the sweet life in the past before everything went to shit, and y'know.. get wasted all the time, pick up a few chicks, check out everything that didn't survive the bombs.. live life to the fullest, y'know?

Unless like, letting her die somehow erases his existance in the future.. and he starts to disappear ala Marty in Back to the Future. If that was the case.. well.. shit.

[Timothy225]

Wait, even knowing that everything would work out - you'd make a ton of money, win the fight, get a free gay-cop-pornshow, and get off scot-free (and a nifty chopper) you'd still throw the fight?

Yeah. I'd still get a nice chunk of change from Marsellus, I can live without the gay-cop-pornshow, I'd avoid the car crash and wrecking my pretty face, wouldn't have a dead John Travolta in my crib while I'm waiting for my Pop Tart, wouldn't have to lose my LA privleges, and I don't know how to ride a motorcycle so Zed's hog would be useless to me.

Too much aggrivation, sorry.

[TzuDohNihm]

To continue MissZooey's theme, if I'm ever at the point where I've shot the killer/slasher/monster that's been terrorizing my family and friends, I'm going to make goddam sure he/she/it is fucking dead before I limp away in assumed victory.

I mean, stabbing, head-stomping, rock-smasing, fully unloading my clip, showing it a picture of Ann Coulter, whatever it takes, to Make. Sure. It's. Dead.


Cue end credits for Behind the Mask.

[Timothy225]

Point taken. But if anyone's standing in the corner with his face to the wall, you've made a huge mistake.

Speaking of Blair Witch, even though I'd probably be the one in the corner at the end, I'd immediately turn around and profusely thank the Blair Witch for shutting Heather up at long last. I'd also have greased that one yahoo after he lost our map (these dolts couldn't get copies of the map made for each of them in case they get seperated? Didn't they have a Kinko's or something back then?).

EDITTED TO ADD: To run with what Jacob's saying, once the monster's down, cut off it's fucking head. I was yelling this over and over again at Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween H20. Fortunately, she heard me.

[MissZooey]

Remember, Timothy, these are the same people who thought it would be good fun to go into the woods to stalk an unchecked supernatural power that was allegedly responsible for the gristly murders of dozens of people. I think operating a photocopier was probably a hair too complex for them.

[Overlord]

I'd much rather rule the galaxy with my dad than throw myself off a thousand foot ledge.

[BillyG]

EDITTED TO ADD: To run with what Jacob's saying, once the monster's down, cut off it's fucking head. I was yelling this over and over again at Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween H20. Fortunately, she heard me.

The Headless Horseman can still attack sans cranium. Be sure to remove head, hands, arms, legs, and feet. Bury each 10 feet deep, covered in a layer of salt, in locations no closer than 50 miles apart so that they cannot self heal and allow the psycho/killer/monster/demon/warlock to come back to life wondering why he only got one hand back.

[Timothy225]

Remember, Timothy, these are the same people who thought it would be good fun to go into the woods to stalk an unchecked supernatural power that was allegedly responsible for the gristly murders of dozens of people. I think operating a photocopier was probably a hair too complex for them.

They can run a video camera, they can drive a car, they can pitch a tent, but they can't drop a couple of dimes in a copy machine? Y'know what, fuck 'em. They deserve to be whacked by the Blair Witch.

[Trejo]

The Headless Horseman can still attack sans cranium. Be sure to remove head, hands, arms, legs, and feet. Bury each 10 feet deep, covered in a layer of salt, in locations no closer than 50 miles apart so that they cannot self heal and allow the psycho/killer/monster/demon/warlock to come back to life wondering why he only got one hand back.

Your still screwed in both The Blob and The Thing

[Stormin]

I'd much rather rule the galaxy with my dad than throw myself off a thousand foot ledge.

That's why you've got that avatar.

In all those scenarios where a supporting character is captured by the bad guys and tortured/interrogated into giving up the good guys' identities/locations/plans/information, they've always made a huge mistake. Never. Get. Taken. Alive. I am a definite believer in Tojo's military strategy in that sense.

[Stormin]

The Headless Horseman can still attack sans cranium. Be sure to remove head, hands, arms, legs, and feet. Bury each 10 feet deep, covered in a layer of salt, in locations no closer than 50 miles apart so that they cannot self heal and allow the psycho/killer/monster/demon/warlock to come back to life wondering why he only got one hand back.

Now this guy knows what he's talkin' about.

[Timothy225]

The Headless Horseman can still attack sans cranium. Be sure to remove head, hands, arms, legs, and feet. Bury each 10 feet deep, covered in a layer of salt, in locations no closer than 50 miles apart so that they cannot self heal and allow the psycho/killer/monster/demon/warlock to come back to life wondering why he only got one hand back.

I'm writing this down, just in case, but there's an even easier solution - stay the hell out of Sleepy Hollow.

As for monsters, I live in Jersey Devil country (he says "hello" by the way), so we're used to these shenanigans these critters pull. We also know how to put these persnickity critters down, for we have no fear and we taste terrible (must be the radon and carcinogens we grew up with).

Back on thread: blind or no, I would definitely yield immediately to Zatoichi in any of his films.

[Doc Happenin]

I would not have let that German sonofabitch go, not when we're in the middle of a war and especially not in the manner in which they did. Stupid Tom Hanks, bet you're really regretting that one.

[Timothy225]

That's why you've got that avatar.

In all those scenarios where a supporting character is captured by the bad guys and tortured/interrogated into giving up the good guys' identities/locations/plans/information, they've always made a huge mistake. Never. Get. Taken. Alive. I am a definite believer in Tojo's military strategy in that sense.

Sort of related, but if I were Auric Goldfinger, I'd have let the laser do it's work on 007. He knew about Operation: Grand Slam and he wasn't supposed to? Fuck him. Then it'd be me and Pussy Galore and a shitload of gold and Oddjob and a mint julep and...

[Van Read]

I would have blown the fuck out of the escape pod. No escape pod, no dead Palpatine.

[BillyG]

Your still screwed in both The Blob and The Thing

Pour a tablespoon of sugar on The Blob. I'll think on Thing.

EDIT: Timothy225 - The solution isn't really pointed towards Sleepy Hollow, just that those that wish to destroy us have the ability to continue on their destined path of blood and guts without a head. Or even a head with a pipe through it. And if I was in Sleepy Hollow I would be more worried about the frogs croaking my name.

[Richard Dickson]

Interview with the Vampire: If I'm Christian Slater, I listen to about ten minutes of this whiny bullshit, open a window and be done with it.

[Doc Happenin]

That makes me think of The Thing more and, really, there's not a whole lot you can do, short of killing every other living thing in sight. The terror of that film works because you're stuck in the Antarctic with no way out. Damn, gonna have to think long on this one...

[Rob]

"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Richard Dickson again."

[LisaNY]

Remember, Timothy, these are the same people who thought it would be good fun to go into the woods to stalk an unchecked supernatural power that was allegedly responsible for the gristly murders of dozens of people. I think operating a photocopier was probably a hair too complex for them.
And who continued filming no matter what horrible thing happened to them. At what point do you think to yourself, "Yeah, okay, evil entity out in the woods is after me. I can run faster if I drop the fucking camera, the footage isn't worth it."

[Timothy225]

And who continued filming no matter what horrible thing happened to them. At what point do you think to yourself, "Yeah, okay, evil entity out in the woods is after me. I can run faster if I drop the fucking camera, the footage isn't worth it."

But what if they were going to submit the footage to "America's Funniest Home Videos"? A wad of cash and a chance to meet Bob Saget (and if I have the time period right, Tawny Kitaen)? Shit, I'd clutch that footage like a football, and ditch the other two. Blair Witch would be so busy with them, I'd make a clean getaway.

Then I'd use the money to kick start my plans to RULE the WORLD. But, alas, you know too much... Oddjob! The Laser!

[Richard Dickson]

Jurassic Park: "Mr. Hammond, this is Doctor Malcolm. Yeah, I've read enough science fiction to know that I don't need to travel all the way to some tropical island to tell you that cloning dinosaurs is a terrible idea."

[Doc Happenin]

"You're a dude? I'm out!"

[Ratty]

I would get a bigger boat.

[Xagarath Ankor]

Movie: The Deadly Spawn
Scene: Two campers in a tent. They converse:
"What was that noise outside?"
"Let's go check"
Knowing how it all turns out: Hiding in the tent instead would probably have been no help whatsoever, so I'd run for the hills instead of stopping to look around
Not knowing: Hide in the tent?
Certainly not doing what they did and going outside for a nice long look around.

[le Stephanois]

Easy Rider- Hunt down the rednecks who killed Jack Nicholson.

[EdHocken]

The Fly: Make sure those telepods have proper seals and to gave one last look around to make sure nothing is in the freakin chamber before turning the switch.

Scarface: Check the tats on Montana and his friend's hands to see if they've got any association with the criminal underworld. If so, alert the feds.

Silence of the Lambs: Put way more fuckin secuity than just two cops watching Hannibal Lecter.

[JGButler]

Remember, Timothy, these are the same people who thought it would be good fun to go into the woods to stalk an unchecked supernatural power that was allegedly responsible for the gristly murders of dozens of people. I think operating a photocopier was probably a hair too complex for them.

For some reason I've always thought that word was spelled "grisly," throwing in the extra t just makes it AWESOME. A "gristly" horror movie sounds so much more intense than a simple "grisly" one.

Oh, and so as not to derail - off the top of my head, I obviously don't hijack Keitel and his family in their RV and drive them and my brother to the Titty Twister. That was a colossal fuckup on Mr. Seth Gecko's part.

[EdHocken]

Hey now, that's just uncalled for killer/slasher/monster brutality.

Hey, it's not like he said they were nude pictures, now.

[Timothy225]

Knowing what I now know, I'd have spared myself the money I spent watching the Prequel Trilogy.

I also never would have sent Luca Brazzi out to talk to Sollozzo. I also would've given Johnny Fontane the part - the audience he'd bring in with his Guinea charm... Best Picture Oscar and more horses.

I'd have asked Bruce Lee to check himself into a hospital and get a complete physical before shooting his last movie.

[Syd]

I've never understood (and this goes for real life too) why anyone would ever work in the mob. Yeah, the money's good, but the worst thing that can ever happen in any other job is your boss will fire you; you screw up in the mob, and they FUCKING KILL YOU. And for little things! Tell a fat joke about the boss's wife? Kill a horse? Gay? Dead.

Yeah, I've got Sopranos on the brain lately.

[horrid]

If I was Ned Beatty, I would have squealled harder.

[donde]

Godfather - If I was Michael I would have stopped having kids after the first one. Would have cut out the worst parts of Part 3.

[Timothy225]

Army of Darkness - If I was dating Bridget Fonda, I'd take her to a nice hotel room and make sweet, sweet love to her, instead of taking her to that cabin in the woods with that pesky 'ol Necronomicon.

[BubWilliams]

I would have told Tom Hanks not have all that gay sex in Philadelphia. It would be a less funny movie without the AIDS though.

[teledork]

The Movie: The Natural

Scene: Memo Paris (Kim Basinger) implores Roy Hobbs (Robert Redford) to take the money offered and leave with her...forcing Hobbs to choose between Kim Basinger and a bunch of guys that have as many sags in their jowls as they do in their baseball uniforms or blowing her off and putting it to the Man(s).

Knowing how it turns out: "Hmmm...if I win the game, next year I can renegotiate my contract and I'll be Flush forever....yeah...that's sounds good."

Not knowing how it turns out: "Hey, Memo....you notice how all the chicks here are pregnant or new mommas? hehehehehehehehehehehhe....wanna play doctor?"

[Raspberry Leper]

There is a pretty good chance I would have folded and told Mom that the babysitter was dead.

[BubWilliams]

There is a pretty good chance I would have folded and told Mom that the babysitter was dead.
Before or after you did "stuff" to the body?

[Brendan]

Movie - Aliens
Scene - Deciding whether to join the mission and go to the planet to check on the colony
Knowing how it all turns out - "Nuke the fucking planet. There's plenty more."
Not knowing how it all turns out - Do my job and go in. This is all assuming I'm one of the marines.

[Syd]

Would you ensure that there was someone, anyone, anyone at all up in the spaceship so that they could come down and get you should your only mode of transportation is destroyed?

[Samurai Mike]

"Samurai Mike, will you take the Ring to Mordor?"

"Nah, fuck that for a lark. I'm getting on the piss."

[Virtanen]

I probably wouldn't choose to drive to a hotel that has police surveillance, shoot Waingro in the cranium, dump my girl and get shot. But that's just me.

[teledork]

Forgive this, as it isn't film related, but I've been watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer (made it partway through the 3rd season. I've seen a lot of it before and know how it ends, but I've also forgotten a lot. So hush.) and I'd really like to know how they're able to continue finding teachers for that high school. Can you imagine what those job interviews are like? So, yeah, I wouldn't be the school nurse at Sunnydale High.

Teacher's Union negotiated an extra 8 minutes on the prep period for each day. Plus, after 90 days you're vested fully in the life insurance program.

[Doc Happenin]

I would have gotten those damn eagles to fly me to the volcano. Would've saved me three movies (not that I am not appreciative of said movies).

[Brendan]

Would you ensure that there was someone, anyone, anyone at all up in the spaceship so that they could come down and get you should your only mode of transportation is destroyed?

Well... that would be a good call and you'd think they would have done something like that. But if those other two pilots didn't open the back door to their ship the problem could have been averted. If I were the pilot I'd be scared shitless that something was in fact out and really... should they not have heard the team communications? That seems to make sense that they could have tapped into that and heard them all getting slaughtered.

But they were all a bunch of hot shots, know it alls. And none of them seemed to believe the "alien story" Ripley told them.

[Richard Dickson]

GoodFellas:
When Paulie tells me not to deal drugs, I don't deal drugs.

Temple of Doom:
"Hey Indy, where lady?"
"Oh, she, um, must have ... fallen out of the car a few blocks back. Got the antidote though."

[C.Swicegood]

MOVIE: The Departed

Scene: Final showdown between Sullivan and Costigan

Knowing how it's all turns out: I would have given Sullivan a couple of more kicks to the teeth and then taken the stairs.

Not knowing how it all turns out : At least get somebody else there to back me up. I mean you're in an abandoned building in a remote part of Boston, come on!


ETA: Shouldn't this be moved to Movie Miscellany?

[Trejo]

the 25th Hour:
Took Brian Cox up on his offer.

[Abbott & Prospero]

The Fly: Make sure those telepods have proper seals and to gave one last look around to make sure nothing is in the freakin chamber before turning the switch.


Or, you know, simply program the computer to abort the sequence if anything else is detected in the pod aside from the main subject.

[Devildoubt]

I would have gotten those damn eagles to fly me to the volcano. Would've saved me three movies (not that I am not appreciative of said movies).
Yeah, and you would've gotten your ass handed to you by 10m arrows and 9 screaming Nazguls.

Anywho...

When Gozer asked me if I was a God, I would've said "Yes."

[Devildoubt]

One more:

In Dawn of the Dead (2004), I would've suggested that the group take a whole bunch of gas from their gasoline supply and use it to set all the Zombies on fire outside the mall. The mall outside is fire-proof (unless I'm mistaken, mostly internal components are flammable in modern buildings), so those a-holes can burn and bump into each other, setting everyone on fire. Once they've burned, THEN go get Andy and the ammo.

If nothing else it would clear out a whole bunch of asshole zombies.

[TzuDohNihm]

WarGames: I would have just taken my ass whipping from my dad and gone to summer school.

[LisaNY]

Oh, Bruce Willis, why did you have to go upstairs when you heard the noise? You and Olivia Williams don't have a phone extension downstairs to call 911 that there's an intruder in your house? You couldn't have hidden in your basement? Since that's where your home office was located, I assume you had a phone downstairs there too? You would have been safe and un-shot by Donnie Wahlberg.

[Doc Happenin]

In Kingdom of Heaven...Orlando, you fuck up. Marry Eva Green (she's hot) and lo and behold, you irrevocably alter the course of Christian/Muslim relations for the better for a thousand years. But nooo...stupid son of a bitch.

[Timothy225]

300 - Leonidas, Leonidas, Leonidas. Would it have killed you to give Ephialtes a shot at glory? You could've sent him out ahead of your phalanx, have him charge into the Persians and do his thing. He'd most likely get cut down, but I'm sure he'd take a few Persians with him - just like a real Spartan would. That way, he'd never have betrayed you to Xerxes, you and the Spartans wouldn't have been outflanked, and we'd get some more battle scenes.

Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith - Anakin, why the FUCK didn't you listen to Mace? You wait in the Chambers, Mace destroys Palpatine, you eventually become a Jedi Master, and get to spend the rest of your life drilling Amidala and playing with your kids on Naboo, teaching them the ways of the Force. Putz.

[Raspberry Leper]

I wouldn't have let Marla take both parasites. That's not fair.

[FrankCobretti]

The Passion:

Flay me alive, then crucify me? I think not. Say hello to my little friends ... fire and brimstone!

[Chris Myers]

If I had been Ian Malcom, I would have made sure Nick van Owen stayed home.

[Doc Happenin]

You know what Holly? You're a pretty bad person, so no, I'm not going to the airport and if you just happen to get stuck in a plane circling in the sky because a bunch of ex-army terrorists are mad at the government, then you can go fuck yourself. I'm watching the game.

[Doc Happenin]

If someone asked me if I were a God?

I'd say YES!

[DARKMITE8]

Personally, I wouldn't have brought a knife to a gunfight.


In the Goofus and Gallant equation on this life lesson... Goofus = Wop.

[Daughters]

Robocop 2

Scene 1.22+ http://youtube.com/watch?v=1ygMd5Kq_44

The fat guy so close but yet so far, should have stayed down
and crawled his way out.

Love that scene I always feel great relief when Kuzak makes it
out down the drain.

[Patrick Ripoll]

How would Patrick Ripoll have dealt with the mixed signals Claudette Colbert sends Clark Gable in It Happened One Night? A little bit of passive-agressive flirting, a lot of obsessing, perhaps a bit of crying (I would try, but no tears would come out, which is a frustrating and stupid feeling), and ultimately, when she ends up with King Wesley, self-loathing.

But that's why I'm no Clark Gable.

[DARKMITE8]

I woulda killed my brother, not myself, at the finish-line of Consumer Recreation Services' mindf**k.

EDIT: And I wouldn't buy any flora and/or fauna in Chinatown. Seymour Krelborn and Randall Peltzer were schmucks. Scratch that, maybe I would. I'm a schmuck.

EDIT 2: You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Patrick Ripoll again.

[Alan "Nordling" Cerny]

"You're right, Gordon. Greed is good. Fuck Bluestar. If my dad bitches, I'll toss him Daryl Hannah and she can blow him while she redecorates his house. While she's doing that, I'll figure out some way to spend my billion dollars."

[Casey Moore]

Thomas Crown Affair remake: when the paint washes off it would be a big fuck you. Then there would have been a note for her at the helicopter landing saying: Come with the painting or you keep the car. All my love, Tommy.

Reservoir Dogs: I don't tell "my friend" I am an undercover cop. Instead I try and talk him down from dying. If not, fuck it.

[LisaNY]

Hmmm, lemme see... I'm a smart, beautiful, talented and successful 57-year-old woman. I have my choice between this gorgeous, kind, sexy as hell, but much younger 39-year-old doctor who loves me, or this fat, obnoxious, 66-year-old slob of a gasbag who treats me like shit, but is more age appropriate. In this case? No, Diane, you don't ditch the younger guy who treats you like gold for the obnoxious fat asshole just because he's closer to your age.

[Johnny Bola]

If I were Vincent Vega I would have kept my Amsterdam quality heroin in my pants pocket.

Pros-Don't risk becoming a fucking grease spot if the boss finds out his wife almost OD'd on my drugs while I was supposed to be watching her.

Cons-Might not get to hear the joke about the family of tomatoes.

[Doc Happenin]

Pros-Don't risk becoming a fucking grease spot if the boss finds out his wife almost OD'd on my drugs while I was supposed to be watching her.

Cons-Might not get to hear the joke about the family of tomatoes.

That's a god damn Sophie's Choice right there.

[Timothy225]

Animal House - Were I Dean Wormer, I'd go ahead and give Delta Tau Chi just ONE MORE CHANCE.

[JacknifeJohnny]

Movie - Night of the Living Dead
Scene - Basement vs. Upstairs debate.
Knowing how it all turns out - Lock myself in the basement and put Barbra outside as a distraction / zombie bait. Simply tell Harry Cooper to shut the fuck up and leave me alone lest he suffer a vicious ass-kicking. Actually saying something to let redneck rescuers know that I'm not a zombie. Also, I'd have the Cooper's restrain their daughter, then work it out amongst themselves whether or not to put a bullet in her head.
Not knowing how it all turns out - Lock myself in the basement and relieve stress by punching Barbra out everytime she got annoying.