It's the holidays and we're feeling it even here in the Sewer. This year we're taking stock of the many gifts we've gotten from the movies over the years and celebrating them in the form of a Christmas carol. In our own special way.

While the traditional 12 Days of Christmas counts up from one, we think it's more fun to count down between now and the big day (and yeah, we built in some slack for ourselves). So sit back and get ready for some great moments from some great CHUD favorites, and some possible holiday gift ideas while we're at it.

On the eleventh day til Christmas my true CHUD sent to me...

Eleven Inappropriate Kills



When a traumatized kid dons a Santa suit, Christmas runs red. Eleven people (not counting the snowman) are killed by one of two psychotic Santas in Silent Night, Deadly Night, the holiday horror film that is one of the few films in the US as reviled as the legendary 'video nasties' in England.

Charles E. Sellier Jr's low-budget slasher flick earned loads of controversial press (and a scathing review from Gene Siskel, below) for featuring a criminally deranged Santa who violates a family (after killing a convenience store clerk) and for the carnage that follows when one of the family's surviving children snaps on Christmas Eve. It's also notable for Linnea Quigley's denim shorts, which might be the shortest in Christmas history. All the kills (counting the snowman) are cheap, and more fun than they have any right to be.



Actually, hold up. Silent Night, Deadly Night is a terrible movie. It's a salty old scab on the soft, dewy body of Christmas horror films. So why is it on the list? Because a couple days ago I had a hell of a time watching and ridiculing the movie at the Plaza Theater in Atlanta. (The scenes with Grandpa are some of 1984's best.) A handful of other CHUD readers were there along with an audience excited to have a good time watching a stupid movie.

Not long ago Devin was re-energized after going to the New Beverly in LA, and we've got a lot of readers who patronize rep theaters all across the country -- enough that Devin and I have both talked about doing a weekly feature to round up what's playing across the nation's rep houses. I'm proud that we've got a readership that supports houses showing the good and the bad, that our audience can be equally thrilled seeing a run of Kurosawa films or a piece of crap like Silent Night, Deadly Night.

So celebrate the holidays by going to see something with a group of friends. Buy a friend a membership at the Brattle if you're in the Boston area, or get the some tickets for shows at the monumental Harvard Film Archive, currently curated by Haden Guest, who might have more books signed by David Lynch than anyone I know. Take some friends to one of the great shows at the New Beverly, or do as Alex Riviello has done for months and find a local bar where you can get folks together to enjoy seeing a film alongside a bunch of fellow drunks. (And if you run or love another rep theater, write me and I'll link it here and in the upcoming column.)

And yeah, if you really want to, grab a copy of Silent Night, Deadly Night from CHUD at Amazon.